Page 48

CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN

"I talked to him," my mom says from the doorway just as I’m getting up from the bed.

"LJ already left?"

"Yes. He just left. He looks like a broken man, Alexis."

"Just like I was."

"His sister lied on Instagram too when you said you needed to talk to Lazarus."

"How do you know?"

"I talked to him. He told me he hasn’t been with any woman since he met you. I believe him."

"He could have looked for me."

"Yes. And you could have gone to the hospital. Both of you made mistakes, my daughter. Not just him."

"I’ll never be able to trust LJ, and—” I start to say, but she gently places two fingers on my lips.

" 'Never' is a long time, Alexis. Take it one day at a time. The most important thing you both have is the love you share for the son you made together. And there’s no doubt in my mind that he fell in love with Sedric the moment he saw him."

I can’t deny that—so I don’t even try. "He wants to register Sedric."

"I figured he would ask for that."

"He didn’t ask. He stated it."

"Cut him some slack, Alexis. Put yourself in his shoes, even if you think he was wrong, and ask yourself how you’d feel. From the little I’ve seen of him, it’s clear LJ is controlling. All he wants right now is to keep his son close."

"I’m not a bad person, Mom. I won’t stop him. As for the two of us, I?—”

"Again, don’t rush into promises of hatred, my daughter. I didn’t bring this up before because you didn’t seem ready to hear it, but I know you’ve never gotten over what you feel for him—and unless I’m completely wrong, it’s mutual. Follow your heart."

"My heart is weak. Literally and figuratively, Mom."

"All hearts are when it comes to love, Alexis. That’s what makes it so terrifying and so special."

Lazarus

Later that night

”So you’re telling us you’re the father of a twelve-month-old boy?"

"About that."

"Fuck—and here I thought my life with Taylor before we got married was crazy," William says.

"What do you plan to do about it?"

I take a sip of whiskey before answering. Back when the three of us were single, we used to meet outside of work at least once a week to catch up at a bar. Now, with both of them having families, those meetups have become increasingly rare.

I hadn’t intended to call them tonight. After leaving the penthouse, I headed straight for the hospital.

There’s no chance I’m going back to my house in Massachusetts while Alexis and my son are still in New York.

And I knew if I went to the apartment I still keep here on the island, I wouldn’t be able to sleep.

So I did the only thing I could: I came to work.

I was walking into my office when Athanasios and William found me.

"The only thing I can do," I finally answer. "I'll marry her."

For the first time since this conversation started, William smiles. "Don’t take this the wrong way, but Alexis didn’t seem very willing—judging by the way she was looking at you earlier today."

"It’s not about what either of us wants. It’s for our son’s wellbeing."

"Yeah, that was the excuse I gave myself when I forgave Taylor."

"Your situation was different. You two were in love."

"And you’re not?"

I don’t answer. I don’t want to think about it. I just need to make sure I can keep my son close. Both of them, really. I need her within arm’s reach too. That’s the only way I’ll be certain I’ll get to watch Sedric grow up. "I’m going to have them both. That’s non-negotiable."

"Want some advice?" Athanasios asks, and a few years ago, I would’ve laughed at the idea of my friend giving me romantic advice.

"No, but right now, I don’t have many people to talk to, so I’ll take any help I can get."

"Don’t come at her full-force. William and I tried that approach once, and in the end, we had to beg our women on our knees for forgiveness."

"Alexis was wrong, too."

"And you disappeared from her life after just one weekend together. She’s not like the experienced women we used to date, LJ. What is she now—twenty-five?"

I nod.

"Either way, she still seems like a girl—and her life story . . . Damn, it’s messed up. If you act the way you normally do, you’ll just push her further away."

"Alexis can’t keep Sedric away from me. He’s my son. I have rights too."

"No, she can’t. But she could make your life hell. Swallow your pride and find a middle ground. The one who stands to gain the most from peace between you two is your son."

Alexis

Three days later

"What does he eat?" LJ asks, watching Sedric make a mess with the little bowl of soup Mom prepared for him. He’s been here for an hour and hasn’t mentioned our almost-fight from yesterday, nor has he brought up anything about our son.

That should calm me down—but instead, it makes me even more nervous.

"I was gone for a month, so I missed a lot of his development. At this age, they grow so fast," I say without thinking, and immediately see his expression darken.

A wave of remorse hits me.

Is it always going to be like this? Am I going to feel guilty for the rest of my life because I kept them apart for so long?

"I’m sorry," I say.

"What for?"

"For believing your sister. I’m not apologizing for what happened between us.

Nothing has changed there. You made a choice—to move on with your life without ever coming to talk to me after that weekend.

I don’t want to revisit that. But I am sorry for the time you and Sedric lost together.

I should’ve tried harder. Now, listen to me: there’s no ‘us’ as a couple.

" I give him a sad smile. "There never really was. If you want to be part of Sedric’s life, you’re welcome.

But to do that, you’ll have to forgive me. "

"Why should I forgive you if you can’t forgive me for never coming after you?"

"It’s different."

"No, it’s not. And don’t think you can set conditions for me to be part of my son’s life. Nothing, and hear me loud and clear, Alexis, nothing will keep me from seeing Sedric grow up. I’ve already talked to my lawyers. A notary will come here so we can deal with the paperwork for his last name."

My first instinct is to yell that he has no right to threaten me, but then I remember what I discussed with my mom and try to put myself in his shoes. "I wasn’t trying to threaten you. I just want us to coexist without constant fighting."

"I have a proposal. Something that’ll remove any doubt I have—and guarantee I’ll never be separated from my son again."

"What is it?"

"Marry me. I don’t just want to give Sedric my last name I want you to have it too. We’ll be a family, Alexis."