Page 49 of Soul So Dark

Colson seems like he’s in a relatively good mood, as if he’s never gone to school with a hangover before. But he’s also huge, so what would kill me would probably only give him a buzz.

“Text me if you want to leave,” he calls after me when we part ways at the stairwell.

He says this every morning now. And maybe one day before school ends, I’ll take him up on it. But not today. I’ve decided I finally need to talk to Shelby. We haven’t gone this long without speaking since…ever. And it sucks. It really sucks. And maybe Alex is right that I need to cut her some slack. Anyhow, I need to keep this momentum; the kind that comes from clarity and a different perspective.

And Alex Barrera kissing me before jumping out my window and vanishing into the night.

God…

I’m still thinking about it in U.S. History instead of the worksheet I’m supposed to be filling out while Coach Wheeler stands up at the podium calling on unsuspecting students to identify the differences between the three branches of government. By the time the bell rings for lunch, I’m about to crawl out of my skin.

Routine is a funny thing. Regardless of what’s happened or the awkwardness that persists, I still walk into the cafeteria and sit down at the same table, with the same people, even if I’m currently not speaking to one of them. But I also can’t hide in the library forever, so I sit down next to Shelby, who’s trying to act casual while trying desperately to tear open a packet of mustard for her turkey sub.

Nobody outright ignores me, but they don’t speak to me, either. Carter and Maddie glance at me throughout their conversation in that way that indicates they’re passively including me, but Austin is the only one who addresses me when I sit down. Once he turns to one of his teammates sitting at the table behind us, I’m left with the awkwardness of everyone knowing that I stormed out of Web Design and haven’t spoken to any of them since.

“Hey,” I finally tap Shelby’s arm with my knuckle, giving her a start.

She turns to me, her dark eyebrows unable to decide whether to go up or down. Shelby’s ready at a moment’s notice to go head-to-head with anyone, but this time she doesn’t know what to do. Probably because we hardly ever argue, and when we have, it’s never been so bad that it resulted in the cold shoulder.

“I was angry about the movie, but I understand now that maybe you just didn’t know what to do.Istill don’t really know what to do because everything sucks. But it sucks more without you.”

Shelby starts shaking her head. “I should’ve just asked, but I didn’t want it to come off like I didn’t care, like our plans were more important than what happened. I don’t know you like this, y’know? It’s like—” she pauses, “it’s the kind of thing that happens to someone else, like on the news or a podcast, but it’s not. It happened to you, and I’m sorry I didn’t just ask what you wanted.”

“You’re here now, and that’s what matters. Besides,” I cast a devious glance over my shoulder at Austin, “Austin said he would pay for everyone to go see the movie again. And hemightwear the black lipstick with me.”

“Thank you,” Shelby reaches for me and pulls me in with a sigh of relief, then lowers her voice to a whisper, “because yesterday in French, I accidentally told Kelsey Cutright that CJ was cheating on her and then she called him during class and screamed at him in front of everyone and I had no one to tell.”

I pull away, my eyes bulging. “How did youaccidentallytell her that?”

“You know how we went and sawZero Reckoning?” Shelby asks sheepishly, “Well, I thought I saw her there in the back row with her head in his lap and I might’ve tried to give her a hard time about it. But it definitely wasn’t her.”

I let out a whoop of laughter and then slap my hand over my mouth. After another minute, I’m sufficiently worried that my eyeliner might be running from laughing so hard.

“It happened, I was there,” Carter chimes in from across the table, “you could hear everyone yelling and laughing in Mrs. Tramer’s class down the hall.”

“Well done,” I nod, flashing her theOKsymbol, “bra-vo.”

“Yeah, well maybeCJshould’ve been more discrete about his extra-curriculars,” Shelby retorts as she goes back to fighting with her mustard packet.

“Good, glad that’s over,” Austin mutters before gulping down the rest of his Gatorade, “so can we talk about Shapeshift?”

I shoot him a confused look. “Shapeshift?”

They’re a band that was formed by four guys who graduated from Dire Ridge years ago and they’ve amassed a cult following, us included. Bailin Marquardt’s claim to fame as their lead singer are his filthy screams mixed with animal-like growls and howling. It sounds downright terrifying, which is why they’re one of my favorite bands.

“Ooh, yeah,” Shelby whips around with excitement, “there’s a pop-up show tonight,allegedlyin the basement of the Starliner,” she says, shooting Austin a dubious look.

“Tonight? How do you know?” I ask Austin.

“Adam Casey’s sister gets her hair done by the girlfriend of their drummer’s brother’s roommate and said they’re stopping here on their way to Kansas City.”

As weird as it sounds, it’s probably legit. The really obscure connections are usually the ones that pan out.

The old theatre at the edge of Dire Ridge and Hellbranch is known for playing indie films and campy classics and hosting smaller shows in the 1,200-person venue. However, over the past year, I found out the basement is where the brand-new bands play and the not-so-new ones have secret shows known only by word of mouth. They’re also really cheap, if not free, to get into because they test out their new material. It’s first-come-first-served and the doors close when they hit capacity.

“We’re going,” I say with conviction.

“Yesss,” Shelby hisses, pumping her fists and doing a little dance in her seat.