Page 95 of Smoky Mountain Dreams
“You’re very dedicated.” She smoothed a hand over Marcy’shair.
Stop agreeing with me!It was oneof the things that drove him the most crazy about Ronnie. While he leftmediation sessions fuming with impotent rage, she never even raised her voice. “Buther good condition doesn’t mean this is what she wanted, or that I somehowsecretly believe she’s still alive in there.”
“I know. We go over this every time in mediation.” Shelooked at him, her gray eyes as calm as ever. “But isn’t part of liferecognizing that it isn’t about whatwewant? It’s aboutwhat the Lord wants. Marcy’s vanity or even her dignity isn’t what’s important,Jesse. God’s will is.”
“In this case, God’s will only exists because ofmymoney.”
“No, her good care only exists because of your money. If youstopped paying for the best for her, she would still receive care until Godtakes her home. In your own way, Jesse, you’re contributing to how long shestays on this earth by making sure she’s always given the best of everything.”
Jesse sneered, the familiar anger surging. “You’re so sickin the head.”
“I’m just pointing out that your attachment to her earthlybody is…something you may want to more closely consider.”
“You’re giving me a lot of power in that scenario, Ronnie. Ithought your God was the only contributor to her ongoing life.”
Ronnie ignored him. “Mom and Dad and I can take care ofMarcy, Jesse. You can let her go. You’re allowed.”
“I amnotallowed.”
“Why?” Ronnie seemed genuinely puzzled.
“Does your God believe in divorce all of a sudden?”
Ronnie sighed, pushed her red curly hair behind one ear, andbent low to her sister, kissing her cheek. “Hey, baby sis. Your hair cut isreal pretty. Best one you’ve had in a while. Did Jesse pay someone to come in?”She smiled as though Marcy had answered. “I know. Heisa good husband to you. You’re right. But, Marcy, he’s not a very good man tohimself. He should let you go.”
Jesse snarled. “Don’t talk to her aboutmenot letting go when you’re the one who keeps her trapped here.”
“She can’t hear me. Or so you claim.”
“I don’tclaim. Doctorsknowit. Neurologists—the best in the world.”
“You’re making her stressed,” Ronnie said, rubbing a handdown Marcy’s arm to work out the clawing. “She’s tensing up.”
Jesse glared at her. He didn’t bother telling her that theclawed hand had been that way for months. He knew how long it had been sinceRonnie had visited. The nurses kept him up to date too.
“Mom says that you’ve found someone. A man.”
Jesse frowned. He hadn’t spoken to Nova or Tim about hisfeelings for Christopher yet. They knew he was seeing someone—he’d made thatmuch plain when he asked for their help with the kids—but he hadn’t beenexplicit about who or even what gender the person was. He hadn’t known how tobroach the topic, but…he supposed they’d heard from Brigid or Will, or possiblyAmanda. And they’d met Christopher that day at SMD. It’s not like he’d askedthe kids to keep it a secret or anything. Still, he hadn’t wanted the newsgetting back to Ronnie. Talk about the potential of adding fuel to her fire.
“What of it?”
She shrugged. “Nothing really. I always thought you’d end upwith a man, actually. You loved Marcy, but you were wild for…well, wild formale chickens.”
“Male chickens?”
“You know…”
“Cock? Wild for cock? Are youfucking serious right now?”
Ronnie looked mildly disappointed in him for using cursewords but she just said, “My pastor says gay people are emotionally andsexually addicted to sin. Sometimes it’s like they aren’t even themselveswithout it.”
“You are treading a fine line right now.” He was rigid on theedge of his chair, reminding himself that lunging across Marcy to throttle hersister was not an option.
“But I don’t believe everything my pastor tells me, Jesse.Mom says this guy makes you happy.”
He still couldn’t figure out what she was trying to gain bybeing relatively reasonable. “If you plan to use this against me in the appealsprocess, Ronnie, I swear to God that—”
“Shush now. I’m planning nothing of the sort.” She rubbedher fingers over Marcy’s cheek and then smiled at him, a soft kindness lightingher eyes. It gave him the heebie-jeebies. “Mom, Buddhist-leanings though shehas, reminded me that the spirit of Christ is demonstrated through the fruit aperson bears. I’m sure you’ve heard that? The fruit of the spirit?”
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