Page 121 of Smoky Mountain Dreams

“You didn’t even say that.”

“I couldn’t look at you, so fucking beautiful and about tocome for me, and say something like that. Now calling you a greedy slut or awhore? Sure. Because right that second you weremygreedy slut and whore. But only right that second.”

“I don’t know if we should play that game anymore.”Christopher rubbed his arms and then reached for his shirt. “I feel…gross aboutit.”

Jesse’s eyes went wide and he took Christopher into his armsand kissed his cheeks, eyelids, mouth, and chin. “I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”

“Yeah.”

Jesse rubbed his back. “What can I do to make this better?”

Tell me you love me.

“Just hold me for a few minutes.”

“For as long as you need,” Jesse murmured.

“Or until the phone rings,” Christopher said, and managed toquirk a smile.

Jesse squeezed him tighter.

“You really don’t…think I’m…I mean, you don’t think less ofme now?”

“No. I think less of myself for just doing it and not makingsure it was okay first. For going too far with it.”

“I came so fucking hard, though.”

Jesse shrugged. “Me too. We were into it. Now we’re not andthings look different.”

Christopher nuzzled Jesse’s neck, smelling his skin. “Imight want to do it again sometime. Have you call me dirty things. When we’veplanned it in advance.”

“It’s up to you. I enjoyed it, but I don’t want you to—”

“I enjoyed it too. Someday. Not anytime really soon.”Christopher realized the implication of that comment—that he’d be around forlong enough to make long-term plans about their sex life.

“Sure. In a few months. Or next year. Or never. Whenever youwant.”

And Jesse had assumed it with him. Christopher snuggled intohis arms, warm, safe, and protected.

Chapter Twenty-three

JESSE’SPALMS WERE SWEATING WHENNova opened the door for him and Christopher.She wore one of her long, outdated blue jean skirts and a long-sleeve t-shirtproclaiming love as her guiding force. Christopher wore jeans and the greensweater that brought out his eyes. Jesse nervously hugged her and said, “Hey,thanks for getting the kids.”

Nova had picked them up from school that day, so that hecould collect Christopher to bring him for dinner. They were a little laterthan expected because Christopher had changed shirts three times, unable tofind one he was happy with, until Jesse told him to wear the sweater because noone could resist him in that sweater.

Even though Nova had been the one to suggest invitingChristopher, he couldn’t help but wonder if she’d really be able to acceptJesse with someone else. Sure, she’d practically begged him over the years togive up the burden of Marcy to them and move on, but maybe it was one of thosethings that were better in theory.

He sighed in relief as Nova put her arms around Christopherthere on the doorstep.

“So happy to see you again, Christopher. Come on in and makeyourself at home.” She slid her arm through Christopher’s and guided him downthe hall toward the living room and kitchen, saying, “Tim has taken the kids upthe trail behind the house for a little afternoon mountain walk, but he’ll beback soon enough. Would you like some water or a glass of kombucha? I’ve justgotten it out of the back of the closet and it’s positively fizzy anddelightful. And so good for you!”

Christopher glanced over his shoulder at Jesse with his browcreased. “Kombucha?”

“Have you never had it?” Nova led him to a kitchen chair andsat him down.

Jesse took the chair opposite and leaned his elbow on thetable, winking and smiling when Christopher looked toward him for guidance.

“No, ma’am, I haven’t.”