Page 29

She’s pinned to the bed with roaming hands between her legs and hot breath in her ear, the weight of her husband suffocating her.

His skin is clammy and cold and she shivers, reminding herself that it’s only worse if she fights him.

Give him what he wants. Keep him happy. Be exactly what he calls her or she’ll land in the emergency room again.

As she reaches for his cock, her body goes slack, her eyes blank, and her tone sweet. “You had such a long day at work. Let me make you feel good, baby.”

Olivia wakes with a start, her muscles tense and the feeling of another body flares all her nerves like fireworks.

“Easy, you’re okay. It’s just me. You were dreaming.”

It’s Cole’s voice in her ear this time. His body is beneath hers, warm and solid, and his arms wrap around her back. She isn’t home again in that bed, or in the cottage on the floor. She’s right here in the only place that feels safe.

Despite being aware of her naked breasts pressed against his chest, she closes her eyes tightly and relaxes with an exhale, laying her head over his heart. He’s stroking careful fingers up and down her spine, following each divot and prompting a delightful shiver.

“Is this too much? I was trying to wake you. ”

“No, it’s good,” she hums. “Don’t stop.”

She might feel far too bold on any other day. If he were any other man, he might mistake her permission to touch as permission for more. But she is exhausted in every way she can be and craving the comfort he’s offering after going so long without.

Having moved during the night, they now lay lengthwise on the sofa, her body resting on his.

The blankets still cover them. She’s wearing her underwear, and he’s got his boxers on, but the rest of their skin touches like it was always meant to, pressing soft and warm as he flutters soothing strokes across her back.

“I was starting to think that I would never be that woman on the floor screaming for help again. I thought she died when Jason did, but I guess she’ll never really be gone.”

She thinks he might say something with the way his chest hitches, but she cuts him off. Isn’t sure why she wants to tell him this, but the words burn on her tongue and she spills them into the cold air.

“It was only violent during sex right after we got married. I hadn’t learned then that I couldn’t say no, but it was a fast lesson.

I would end up in the ER for other reasons after that first year, but never because I tried to turn him away.

If anything, I was too eager to please. Too ready to keep him happy.

” She sniffles, her nose wrinkling. “I almost did the same thing in that house. Almost played along and offered them what they wanted to try to stay alive. I don’t want to be her anymore, Cole. I can’t be.”

“There’s no shame in doing what you can to stay alive. For yourself, for your baby.”

“Why do I feel so ashamed, then?”

“They aren’t worth getting in your head like this. Not that asshole in the subway or those fuckers in the cottage. They don’t get to decide who you are.”

She’s about to protest again, but something feels wet and she frowns, lifting her head to meet his eyes right before the realization hits. She flies away from him, taking the blanket with her to cover herself as she sits up and spots a small puddle of breast milk on his chest.

“Don’t worry about it,” he says quickly.

“I need to feed her. I’m so sorry.”

He gets up, using the other blanket to wipe himself clean. “I’ll give her to you. Stay there.”

Watching him cradle the baby against himself after picking her up from the bassinet, something inside her flutters even through her embarrassment. He is the most beautiful man she’s ever seen and her face flames when that desire flickers across her features as naked as her body.

“Hey.” He leans down to hand her Lucy. “I said don’t worry about it. Okay?”

She merely nods, as he grabs his shirt and pants to pull on before he starts puttering around the office, searching boxes.

“You ever watch that show where they bought storage units and resold the stuff?” He pulls out a dark blue t-shirt from a dusty container. “This might fit you.”

“Yes! I was addicted to it.”

“This place reminds me of one of those. So much junk in here, but there could be a few hidden gems.”

He tosses the shirt onto the sofa beside her before opening another box, only to flinch on reflex, cursing a blue streak when the cat pops out. “Fuck, you scared me, you little shit. When did you leave the baby? We could have forgotten you here. Then what?”

“We would have noticed she was gone.” Olivia smiles as he picks up the cat. He plops Flower over his shoulder, patting her back as if burping a baby, and Olivia can hear the purring clear across the room. “She’s far too attached to you to let us leave without her.”

He huffs. “I’m still not a cat person.”

“Sure, sure. I can tell.”

“Keeping her is only practical. She’s a personal heater for the baby.”

“Oh, she has a job now? I see. Yes, that’s very practical.” Olivia grins.

Just as he’s about to reply, the baby’s laughter interrupts them and they both pause.

“Did she just laugh?” Olivia untucks the baby from under the blanket.

“Think so. Looks like she’s smiling, too. That’s not gas, is it?”

“Looks different. More deliberate.” Lucy lets out a giggle and Olivia gasps in surprise at the confirmation. “It’s the first time she’s done that.”

He moves closer, as fascinated as she is. “How do we make her do it again?”

“I dunno….make a face?”

Cole sits beside her and sticks his tongue out at the baby, who finds that more than amusing. With each silly face that makes her baby giggle, she finds herself overwhelmed by a rising wave of affection for him. Her smile spreads wide as the child’s laughter fills the room.

When his expressions run dry and Lucy loses interest, Olivia looks up to find him gazing at her instead, more unguarded than she’s ever seen, her own feelings mirrored back at her.

“I like the way you look at me,” she says softly.

He doesn’t shift his eyes like she thought he might, but holds her stare like he’s glad she caught him. “Good, because I like looking at you.”

There it is again, that forbidden flutter in her lower belly that fans out into a tickle between her legs. Never has she felt more exposed, both physically and emotionally, yet she trusts this man completely. She can only hope that isn’t a mistake.

Then Lucy laughs again in an unpracticed combination of a gurgle and a giggle, and some of the tension between them fades.

“You think this is pretty funny, huh?” Olivia says to Lucy.

“Everything’s funny now that she’s showing us her sense of humor.”

“I’m glad she’s got a good one. We’re going to need it.”

Despite being stranded in a dark gas station, uncertain of their next move, a happy baby brings light to the darkness.

* * *

They’ve been circling the same ten square miles of woods for the last few days. At least, that’s how it feels.

There’s no shortage of food and supplies for looting, but one thing they can’t find is water. All the faucets fail to turn on and the one small pond they stumbled across lured them in with false hope, only to reach out several decomposing arms from its depths.

They’re wasting precious energy trudging through the woods and the last of their water was used up last night. It won’t be long before they’re fucked .

Cole assures her that they’ll find something soon. All these wild animals need water, and one pond can’t provide for them, but they haven’t found another source yet.

Through all of this, the baby strapped to his chest is oblivious to the circumstances. For someone who made a pastime of crying not long ago, she can’t keep the smile off her face. When they stop to rest, Lucy reaches for his hair, trying to grab a chunk.

Things are quiet. With a place to sleep and some water, their journey could be as easy as a walk in the park or a camping trip, but they lack both, and that fosters anxiety.

Her bones creak, her back hurts, and it’s difficult to think of anything but how thirsty she is.

Cole must feel the same, but they don’t complain.

Moaning about it will only make their throats run even drier.

They’re nestled in the roots of an old tree with her head on his shoulder and Lucy in his arms when he spots something in the distance.

“See that?” He points to a long stretch of pipe disappearing between the brush. “Has to go somewhere. Houses. Buildings.”

“Commercial area maybe.”

“Stay close, dunno what we’re walking into,” he mutters, as they get to their feet and follow it further into the wilderness.

The baby squeaks from her sling, providing a running commentary on their travels from her spot against Cole’s chest.

“Coleeeee,” he whispers. “You can do it.”

Olivia smirks. “Keep trying. I told you already I’m gonna win.”

“Yeah, yeah. We’ve been practicing. ”

They haven’t forgotten about that bet. Lately, it’s one of their few sources of entertainment. No opportunity is wasted to try to earn Lucy’s favor and influence her first word.

The abrupt stop and the jerk of her sling cause the baby to frown, almost comically, as the trees part and they face the gates of a community.

‘Magnolia Hills’ The sign reads, framed in branches.

Guards patrol with rifles, but that has to be common now, she figures. Can’t be too careful.

“What do you think?” Cole asks, like she has any clue what the right answer is.

She appreciates the effort, though. His commitment to including her in major decisions, after years of feeling that her opinion was disregarded, provides a small sense of control over her own life, even in a situation where that’s hard to come by.

“It’s risky. They could be hostile. I also think we’ll dehydrate out here if we don’t find anything else soon and this could be our only chance. ”