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It isn’t about him, he tells himself, as she struggles to get away. The flight part of her brain took over, and that’s exactly what’ll happen when it counts. She can’t be out there alone and default to flailing if she wants to stay alive.

“Cole?” The hint of betrayal in her voice and those rapid, harsh exhales on his collarbone cut him deep.

“I’m not gonna hurt you. You know that. You know it. Think. Stop reacting and think about what we just did. Use the airplane arms to get me off you. Really use it.”

He almost lets her go, fearing she’ll suffer more than she’ll benefit, but then she clips his chin with the heel of her hand and escapes. She shoves him and he stumbles back a step, watching anger blaze in those eyes that only held affection for him before he went and did something stupid.

He was trying to make sure she could use this if she needed to, but she isn’t that far removed from what haunts her nightmares and here he is, grabbing her like that piece of shit probably did more than once.

She searches his face, looking for any sign that trusting him was the wrong choice, while he scrambles for a lifeline.

“I should’ve warned you I was gonna do that,” he dips his head, looking away, far more guilty than he needs to be.

Silence hangs heavy, then her doubt gives way to determination.

“This world won’t warn me. It’ll come at me ten times worse and it won’t care if I’m afraid or hurting or flashing back on old memories. What good is all this if I panic and forget? What if I need to protect Lucy and I can’t? Let’s do it again.”

He doesn’t ask if she’s sure and she doesn’t hesitate this time. With each repetition, the movements become smoother and easier, and the trembling in her frame gradually fades.

“Good. Better,” he grunts in approval.

“Again?”

“We’ll come back to it tomorrow, then do a few other things, too.”

She agrees with a nod, lowering to the sofa with a hard exhale. “I used to watch videos on self-defense, thinking one day I’d save myself, but I never did. I’d freeze and forget everything.”

“That’s why we do it over and over again until it comes natural.”

“What if it doesn’t work? What if whoever has me is too strong?”

“Then do whatever you need to get away. Grab a handful of dirt and throw it in their face. Aim for the balls and the nose. That’ll take someone down real fast. Fight dirty.”

“You learned how to fight in the army?”

“Wade taught me first. Started early and didn’t let up until I could kick his ass, not that he’d ever admit that happened.”

“You think he’ll head for that farm on his own? ”

“That’s what I’m hoping. He knew the plan, so maybe we get there and he’s already waiting. I gotta believe that. Don’t think you’d like him. He’s a jerk. He’ll give you a hard time.”

She raises a brow. “I can take someone giving me a hard time.”

“He’ll try to get you in bed every chance he can and he won’t let up.”

She frowns. “Is he dangerous? Do I need to worry?”

“No, no, it’s not like that. He’s just always been the one with a line of women around the corner and he won’t let the end of the world change that. He’ll try to steal you aw—” He trails off, face burning red and his tongue tied.

‘ He’ll try to steal you away.’ He almost said, as if she’s his to begin with.

“I’m sorry I shoved you,” she says suddenly, throwing him a life raft, so he doesn’t drown after that slip. “That wasn’t part of the lesson.”

“It’s alright.”

“I know you won’t hurt me. My instincts haven’t caught up yet in certain situations, but the rest of me knows.”

“I won’t do that again.” He lowers down next to her, their knees brushing. “Thought I was helping, but you don’t need to wonder if I’m about to do something weird.”

“I’m not afraid of you,” her knee bops his and her voice turns sweet. “You can grab me all you want.”

She’s doing that thing again that looks like flirting, but probably isn’t. He ducks his head, mumbling a curse that makes her laugh before the baby cries from her spot on the sofa, breaking the tension with an unsolicited comment.

“One day you’ll learn, too,” Olivia scoops her up to push a soft kiss to a rosy cheek. “We’ll teach you to be brave. ”

We. She’s used that word before and every time it strikes a balance of fear and hope in his gut. They are sticking together, that much is certain, but years from now, who knows where they’ll be.

Maybe she’s feeling some sort of way about that word, too, because she changes the topic, saying they should check what Andrew from the care home put in the bag and dragging it from a corner, revealing far more supplies than he expected.

Towels, blankets, and a fresh first aid kit. Energy bars and those nutrition shakes he used to see in commercials.

“They were loaded if they could spare all this.” He watches Olivia pull out a small disposable camera that they could never hope to develop.

She snaps a quick photo of Lucy. “Who do you think put this in there?”

“One of the residents? They have a lotta stuff in their rooms and no use for it now.”

He leaves out his first-hand experience of how generous they were. The evidence of that still burns a hole in his pocket in the form of an unnecessary condom.

“Hmm. Maybe. Don’t know when we’ll ever be able to see these photos, but it’s nice to have a way to take them. She’s growing so fast. Soon all I’ll have are memories of how little she is.”

She hands him the baby, and just like that, the camera clicks before he can react, making him the unwilling subject of a photo.

“Oh, come on,” he groans. “Don’t do that.”

She smirks. “You didn’t think you were getting out of this, did you?”

“I was hoping. ”

“Nope. And there’s more where that came from.”

His lips form a thin, unamused line. “Great. Okay, gimme that thing.”

He trades the baby for the camera. Olivia’s a natural in front of it, posing with Lucy for the best photo he’s ever taken in his entire life.

Flower’s ears pop up behind Olivia’s shoulder as he hits the shutter button, and she laughs, her face transforming into the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

That’s everything he cares about right there in that picture.

He loves his best friend, wouldn’t ever say that to Wade’s face even if it’s true, but that isn’t tangible anymore.

Olivia and Lucy are. They’re what’s keeping him going now and he can’t help but feel that surge of affection he’s been trying to squash triple and amplify.

They were someone else’s family when he found them. Someone who didn’t deserve or appreciate what he had, and now Cole would give anything to make them both his.