Page 21 of Say You'll Never Let Go

“Please don’t. Don’t go out there. Just run. I can’t keep you safe from them. Couldn’t even keep myself safe.You don’t understand what they do,” he pleads, in a near whisper, breaking her heart with how convinced he is that she’s about to be snatched away.

She cracks the bedroom door against his protests, peeks around the corner, and spots a familiar head above the half-curtained window. The only one tall enough to reach.

“It’s Adam,” she sighs in relief. “Wade, it’s just Adam. I know him. He’s from the place we just left.”

He’s unconvinced, but some part of him must believe her because he doubles over, bracing his hands on his knees before straightening up. “You’re sure?”

“Yes. I’m gonna see what he wants. I’ll be right back. It’s alright, I promise it is. He’s probably just checking to make sure we don’t need anything.”

Fuck, the last thing she needs right now is another visit. Leaving Wade like this, wound up again after she’d just gotten him calm, has frayed her nerves and encouraged built-up anger to bubble to the surface.

How many times did she tell Luke she doesn’t want to be bothered?

How many times did she explicitly sayno visitors?

Too many, and yet here they are with someone on their porch, anyway.

She’s vibrating with rage by the time she reaches the front door and Adam is the unfortunate recipient of that anger.

“Oh no. I told him this was a bad idea,” Adam says, instantly noticing her scowl.

She slips out the door, closing it behind her and hoping that Wade isn’t ten times worse when she goes back in. “Luke sent you?”

“Yeah. I told him that—”

“These visits won’t help. They make it worse. What is he thinking?”

“I’m sorry. He insisted we make sure you’re still alive.”

She scoffs. “Of course I’m alive. It’s not how he thinks. It’s not…fuck.Things were getting better, and now it’s all…I told him not to send anyone. More than once.”

“I know, I know. I tried.”

Her requests have been completely ignored. She’s an adult who can make her own choices and she chose to be here in this house with Wade. Chose to take on that risk, knowing full well what she’s gotten into and doesn’t need anyone checking up on her after demanding privacy.

This is part of the reason she left for the woods when she did. Could have searched for Wade with this house as her home base, but she was never given peace. It was easier to flee to some unspecified spot and fend off the rotters when needed than answer her door all the time.

“You know what?” she says calmly.

Adam hesitates as if it’s a trick question. “What?”

“Can you give him a message for me?”

“Sure.”

“Good.”

There’s a pile of firewood on the porch, and she grabs a long piece, hefting it in her grip before aiming for the converted car wagon just outside her gate.

Horses stand patiently attached to the front with two Paradise Falls men waiting inside. That irritates her even further because she knows they’re here to subdue Wade if needed, possibly kill him if he’s already killed her.

Somewhere in the distance, Adam mutters an ‘aw shit’right before the first taillight on the old Chevy shatters under the force of her hit. It spooks the horses, but only a little. They’ve seen and heard worse.

The second taillight is tougher, refuses to crack, and that’s like fuel to an already raging fire. All her aggression and worry funnels into each strike. Only half of her reaction is even about the visit anymore, the rest is buried frustration that she’s often kept a lid on.

All those sleepless nights she spent wondering if Wade was dead break the padlock on her self-control.

Every man who worked for Silas who laughed in her face before she put a bullet or an arrow through their head. Every time she imagined the horror of what could be happening to Wade and then finding out she’d been right all along….that he really was being tortured and there wasn’t a fucking thing she could do about it. It all flashes in her mind like a horror show.