Page 6

six

. . .

Viv

I need a drink .

That’s my first thought, and the fact that I don’t hesitate is enough to give me pause. Alcohol is not the solution to my problems; it’s the cause of it.

“Do you have what you need?” I ask Eden, who nods. “First round’s on me.”

“Thanks, Viv,” Andi says, giving me a happy smile. “Top shelf, right?”

I roll my eyes as we head to the pub down the road.

She grins, linking her arm through mine. “So tell me. Was that hottie everything we thought he would be?”

“What hottie?” I ask innocently.

“The guy you couldn’t stop salivating over.” Kiana fans her face. “When he came out with that kitten, I think my ovaries combusted.”

Cari gags. “Gross. That’s my brother.”

“I was not salivating ,” I tell her evenly. “I was working. As were you.”

“Uh huh. Working ,” Eden says, clearly amused. “Is that what you call it, hiding away in the back room all by yourself?”

Fuck. I should have been out front, doing things that were worthy of being photographed. I want to do good deeds for the sake of doing good deeds, yes, but I also need them to be documented. If I want an endorsement campaign, I can’t hide away.

“Don’t worry, I got the photos I need,” Eden continues, holding up her camera.

“Including the dude on his bike?” Andi asks.

Eden smirks. “I think I’m going to start a calendar. Hot guys holding small animals. It’ll be a hit.”

I scowl. “Don’t they have to sign a photo release for that?”

Kiana laughs. “Yeah. That is what you’re concerned about?” She shakes her head. “We have got to sort out your priorities.”

“Oh yeah? Like playing isn’t enough of a priority?” I counter.

“We’ve got to get you laid,” Andi announces.

I skitter to a stop. “What?”

“Come on. You were supposed to go on a date with Cari’s brother,” she continues.

Cari grins. “If Al isn’t your type, maybe Tony?—”

“ No .” The word comes out harsh and all four of them stop to stare at me. “It’s a bad idea to go out with teammates’ family members. Especially as captain. I can’t be the cause of drama on the team. No, it’s better not to get involved at all.”

Kiana rolls her eyes. “Yeah, okay. Whatever.”

Truth be told, it has been a while for me. The hookup scene is getting old. My friend Rachel just started dating a hockey player on the Grizzlies, and although I’m happy for her, I can’t help but feel sorry for myself at the same time.

Nobody is falling head over heels for me. I’m too bitter, too caustic. I’m fun for a night but nobody wants to keep me for longer. I’m secure enough in my body, I know my muscles are what makes me strong and sexy, but the fact remains, a lot of guys are intimidated by women who work out and are stronger than them. It considerably lowers my chances.

I typically date other athletes. When Rach started dating Jake, he introduced me to some of his friends… but nobody struck a spark. It doesn’t help that I have a brother who plays hockey in the same league, plus another brother who plays in the NFL. For some reason, they have issues setting me up with their teammates. I can’t imagine why.

At the pub, I order a tonic water and lime and take in the room. It’s a cozy, run-down kind of vibe. The floor is sticky beneath my sneakers and there’s a hazy glare from the yellowed lamps lighting the pub.

Andi settles across the table from me and folds her hands. “Okay, so let’s get serious here for a minute,” she says. She pins me with a look. “Do you need an intervention?”

My eyebrows go up. “An intervention for what?”

“You haven’t gone out with anyone in a while,” Kiana points out.

“Maybe she likes being single,” Eden cuts in. “She doesn’t have to go out with a different guy every weekend.”

“Well, no,” Andi agrees. “But at least once in a while.”

“Know any cute, single guys?” I ask her pointedly. “Preferably someone who won’t be emasculated by the fact that I can bench press their weight?”

She sits back in her chair. “Fuck, you think I’ve been hiding him away? I’m looking for someone too.”

Cari tilts her head. “Have you tried any apps?”

I swallow carefully. “You’ll want to stay away from apps,” I warn her.

“Why? If it’s just a hook up…”

Kiana shakes her head. “You’re a semi-public figure now. If you’re on Tinder and some dude bro screenshots it, you could tank your endorsement opportunities. To the advertising companies, we’re supposed to be strong and capable and sexy, but not actually sexually active. And if you’re straight, you need to be single, because as soon as you’re in a relationship, they lose interest. Lesbians can share the spotlight because it typically furthers their cause and, frankly, we need all the representation of healthy relationships. Straight women are only meant to be some guy’s arm candy.”

Cari blinks. “Really? They still think that way?”

“Oh, sweetie.” I pat her hand. “Just you wait.”

It’s sick and twisted and disgusting. I’m just one person going up against giant corporations who have more money than sense. I can’t change the system.

It’s only part of the reason I’ve stayed single. Before the last Olympics, I genuinely was fine dating casually. After, I stopped dating altogether. A few clandestine hookups left me feeling empty. It wasn’t like that morning, when I felt like the world was crashing down around me. It just didn’t leave me feeling fulfilled.

But fuck, I miss sex. I miss good sex. Hot, sweaty, panting for breath, can’t get it off my mind sex. It’s been forever and a half since I’ve had that.

It almost makes me wish the date with Al had gone on, but I know it’s for the best that we didn’t. Dating teammates’ siblings is really not a good idea. And on top of that, he plays in the same league as my brother. The last thing I need is this getting back to Chuck and him getting all up in my business. Not to mention the press. Ugh . I can only imagine the media shitstorm it would cause if I dated my brother’s colleague and my teammate’s brother and then it didn’t work . I’d surely be the biggest media punching bag since… I can’t even imagine a similar scandal. Maybe the Russian Olympic doping thing.

No, it’s a good thing it’s over before it even started. I’m just going to have to meet a guy organically. Like I told Cari, dating apps are out of the question. I can’t risk my reputation, my career, for a one-night stand. There are apps for athletes and public figures, but they have to vet you to get you into their system, and somehow, I doubt I’m a big enough name to qualify.

Big enough to have to be mindful about it, but not so much that I’d be on the lists. Outside of the rugby community, nobody knows who I am. All it takes is one good season to knock us into the mainstream media—or one big scandal.