Page 19 of Ruarc

RUARC

Walking further into the caverns, I try to find a quiet spot away from the overwhelming noise from this mass of beings after being on the Zenith for so many orbital rotations with just my brothers for company.

Overstimulation from trying to keep up with so many conversations is causing a pounding ache behind my eyes, and it is more than my mind can take right now.

The lantern I took from one of the tables lights the way as I gradually go deeper inside this large complex.

Empty rooms appear from time to time, but there is no sign of who originally built this place or why.

Just as I reach an intersection, my knees buckle unexpectedly, and I barely manage to catch myself.

Snarling at my sudden weakness, my claws sink deeply into the rock wall as I slowly straighten up.

Rage pulses through me, and for a moment, all I see is red.

Confused, I shake my head. I have no idea what triggered this sudden anger since I am alone.

Taking a few deep breaths to calm my mind and body, I am suddenly struck by an odd smell.

Raising the lantern, I retrace my steps only to discover a room I initially missed.

Dampness surrounds me as I venture further inside; the only sound is the splashing of my footsteps through the water covering the floor.

I turn a corner and stop abruptly as the steam in the room makes it difficult to see what’s ahead.

Carefully, I move forward only to find a hidden oasis.

A well-placed hole in the ceiling lets in enough natural light to highlight the room, and as my eyes adjust, I cannot miss all the wild vines and flowers lining the rock walls surrounding a hot spring in the middle of the floor.

Setting the lantern down, I carefully walk forward, bending down to test the water’s temperature with my hand.

Seeing that it is hot but not unbearable, I look around, wondering if Kallen and the others would enjoy this hidden retreat.

I can picture the smile on her face as she surveys the natural beauty that has been hiding here all along.

I can see her slipping off the wrap she’s wearing, slowly revealing the curves I long to trace with my tongue.

“Ruarc, where are you?”

My comm unit going off has me growling out loud. I turn, snatching up the lantern before stomping back out into the central passage, knowing the peace I was seeking will not be found this rising as my comm keeps dinging.

“Ruarc?”

“Frack, Slavic! What do you want?”

“Quit your snarling and get your ass back to the main sustenance area. The females have worked hard preparing this meal, and I swear you will regret it if you don’t smile and act like you appreciate it.”

“Slavic, I am not good at pretending.”

“I am not asking, I am telling. This is important to mam, and you will not darken this moment for her or the others. For frack’s sake Ruarc, the gods gave us our lifegiver back, so put your anger aside for a few minutes and think about that.”

I hit the button and cut off our comm’s before I tell Slavic to shove it up his ass. Once more, I feel my agitation rise, and I push it down, confused by my constantly shifting emotions. I am not the most jovial male in existence, but I usually have more self-control over my feelings than this.

I find myself back in the main hall sooner than I wanted and force my legs to carry me through the archway where everyone else seems to be.

The moment I step through the door, my eyes find mam, and she gives me a soft smile before holding her hand out for me to come to her.

“You have been gone from me long enough, young one. No more disappearing. My old hearts could not bear it if you were suddenly taken from me again.”

“Forgive me, I was exploring.”

“Is that what you call escaping or running away this rising?”

“My control is not what it has always been, mam.”

“It is because you are fighting something larger than yourself, and that something was supposed to be rejoiced in, not dreaded. Your rejection is setting things in motion that I fear will destroy you if they reach their end. But we will discuss this again later. Right now, I want to enjoy having all of you here with me once more. There may have been no reason to celebrate before, but your return has brought out the best in the females. They have all worked hard preparing dishes that many of us have not had since being on Uzrul.”

The mention of our homeworld makes me hesitate.

Several questions abruptly surge through my mind.

Would these survivors want to go back to Uzrul?

What happened to the miners who rioted on Viri 9?

I have never allowed myself to look back during all this time, but their numbers here are few, and most are females.

Even though this mountain compound is safe, in a few generations, only a handful will remain.

I need to talk to Slavic about our next steps, and just as I turn toward where I saw him last, I come face-to-face with Kallen.

Her long black hair is intricately braided, and her new wrap curves around her smaller frame for all to see.

We both stand there in awkward silence for a moment.

When I do nothing, I see sadness settle into her amber eyes, which mark her as royalty to all who recognize the signs.

She looks down and turns away, shoulders slumped, and my hearts catch in my throat because all I do is cause her more pain.

My hand lifts on its own, and I barely stop myself from reaching out to her.

For a moment, everything around me seems tinted red, and I feel as if my body is growing larger. A big green hand lands on my arm, and I swipe out, hitting Einars’ massive chest with my open palm, but even with my strength, I barely move him.

“Calm yourself brother, there are no threats here. Come.”

Einar smiles in reassurance but never releases my arm as he pulls me behind him.

Shaking my head, I struggle against my emotions, as my mind yearns to lash out at everyone around me.

He shoves me down into a seat, then someone sets a plate down in front of me.

It’s been so long since I have had a dwelling-cooked meal that I hesitate to take the first bite until I look up and see my brothers practically devouring theirs.

The first bite explodes over my taste buds, and before I know it, I have cleaned my dish. Mam comes walking toward us with a set of plates on a tray. “I had a feeling that would not be enough to sustain the lot of you. Here, I hope this tastes like home.”

She places a small plate in front of me, running her hand over my shoulders as she passes by to give the others theirs.

The small pastry in front of me almost goes uneaten, because I want to savor it forever.

When I was a youngling, I can recall the house smelling like this when we would come back from training.

Closing my eyes, I let my mind drift back to simpler times when I would ride on sire’s shoulders and play war with wooden figures on the floor with Slavic, while mam and sire watched.

Unbeknownst to me, such peaceful times were taken for granted as a youngling.

“I will arm wrestle you for that if you are not going to eat it.”

Slavic’s hopeful voice makes me smirk, “Touch this Slavic and I will add your fingers to the menu. I was simply reflecting for a moment.”

Just as I go to take my first bite, music fills the air and surrounds us with a memory-provoking melody.

Looking up, I see that the older Ruk males who escaped as well have crafted some homemade instruments, and as they begin singing songs that reflect our past, their loud voices fill the air.

Atasha tugs Kallen up out of her chair with a massive smile on her face as she starts pulling her around and around.

I am so focused on the smile on Kallen’s face that I miss my brother’s getting up to join in the festivities until Falon grabs Atasha in one arm before pulling Kallen in with his other.

All of them sway together as Atasha rests her head on Falon’s shoulder making my hearts shudder, and I see spots form in front of my eyes.

Taking a deep breath, I force myself to look away as I fight against the monster within me that wants to tear Falon apart for even touching Kallen, let alone daring to hold her close.

Someone pulling the chair out next to me catches my attention.

“Ok party pooper, you’re so mad I swear I can see steam coming off your body.

If it pisses you off so much for someone else to touch her, then why aren’t you up there yourself? ”

Biting my lip to keep from snarling at Ruby, I swallow the inflammatory words that just came to my tongue. I do not want to fight my big brother right now, and hurting Slavic is the last thing I want. “I do not have to answer to you, Ruby.”

“No shit, really?? Because you sure as hell need to answer to someone. Kallen is probably the nicest person—alien, whatever I’ve ever been around.

And you’re a huge dick , but for some reason that I’m not even going to pretend to understand, your god said you two belong to each other.

Personally, I think she got the shitty end of this deal, but you, now you hit the jackpot, and you’re throwing it all away. ”

“Go away, Ruby! There is no way you could understand.”

“You know, that just riles me right up. Why do you think I wouldn’t understand, because you’re a guy … another species … a jerk?! Please enlighten me so that in your eyes I’m no longer ignorant.”

“I am not worthy of her; Falon or one of the others would have been a better match.”

“Oh, you mean the man-whore? I mean, just look at Falon on the floor rubbing his junk on every female in the area. Yep, that’s exactly what Kallen needs, a male who would never be faithful.

As much as I hate to say it, you’re the better option out of the two of you, if you could get your head out of your ass, that is. ”

“Why do you care? This does not affect you.” Ignoring her comment about Falon and his promiscuity, it shocks me that my snarled response does not have the desired effect on Ruby as she neither drops the subject nor leaves me be.

Her small face scrunches up in vexation before she snaps back at me, her voice low yet heated.

“Are you sure about that? Because I’m pretty sure that if or when you or Kallen die from this madness, your brothers and your mother are going to fall apart.

Not to even mention that little girl over there who just got her best friend back.

Can you imagine what she will go through if she loses her again?

And you, you selfish ass , that’s gonna affect all of us.

You told my sister she was a bitch because she was going to let your brother die.

I can think of several much harsher words to call you since you’re doing the same thing! ”

“Kallen will be fine once I leave. The collar will fade, and she will be able to continue on.”

“Wow, you’re delusional! Okay, let’s assume that your leaving actually works?

Just imagine how you’ll spend every cold night on the Zenith thinking about the man who stepped in and took your place.

A guy who gets her smiles, her tears, and her love.

He will be wrapped in her warmth while you grow colder.

I hope she haunts you for eternity, you selfish prick! ”

Ruby practically throws her chair aside as she gets up and stomps off, her anger with me evident in the stiff movements of her body as she moves back over to where she and Slavic were sitting.

Music continues all around me, and as I glance around, I see many smiles and even notice several small human females joining in the activities, but I feel like I am standing on the outside looking in.

Pushing to my feet, I fight the evil bastard inside of me who is whispering that I can make this all stop with just one word.

All I must do is push my will out to the others here, and this madness would cease momentarily.

But then I see Atasha sitting on Einar’s shoulders and mam being twirled around by Slavic.

It is a sight I never thought I would witness again, and I try to soak up their happiness.

Falon has his arms wrapped around the two Ruk scouts, and the way they are looking at him, I know he will not slumber alone this rising.

Kallen is surrounded by several females, all with concerned, caring faces, and I know that she is finally allowing herself to be a part of something.

Feeling like an intruder, I turn and walk out of the room toward the outer cavern.

The further I go, the more torn I feel as Ruby’s words echo through my mind.

I stop, almost turning back, only to remember who and what I am. With heavy hearts, I walk away.