Page 17 of Ruarc

It was like it all happened in slow motion from that point on.

Suddenly, there was a knife at my throat.

I must have made a noise, or maybe he felt it through our bond, but your sire turned toward me, and the Aynar he was fighting took advantage of his distraction, running him through with his sword.

I do not remember being cut, only collapsing to the ground, unable to breathe.

The world around me became foggy as I watched Einar and Ruarc collapse halfway up the ship’s ramp, while Slavic, my dear youngling, you fought against impossible odds.

I remember praying to the gods that they not take my young ones, that they would give you a chance to fix the mistakes of your lifegivers. ”

Mam reaches over, her hand gently cupping Slavic’s cheek.

“The look on your face when you saw me lying there has forever haunted me.

A youngling should never have to witness that.

I watched as the ship left the surface and broke through the atmosphere.

Then I closed my eyes, ready to join your sire in the afterlife, even knowing I was sacrificing the life I carried inside me.

I was done trying to survive in a world without him.

Just as I felt my spirit heading to the afterlife, a sturdy set of arms yanked me up off the ground.

Kallen risked her life running through the miners still fighting the Aynar to get to me. I was told later that she worked nonstop on that cargo ship for risings without a break, determined to save me and Atasha. Her strength has gotten me through when I was at my weakest.”

“She says the same about you, Mam. Kallen told us that none would have survived here without your counsel.”

Slavic’s heartfelt response is quick and without hesitation as he assures our mam that Kallen’s devotion to her is still as unwavering as it ever was.

“There has been much loss, and even though I have tried, I am not a leader by nature, but I refused to sit in the background and allow others to suffer if I could see a way forward. We barely endured the first cold season. Even after all this time, hunger and clothing issues persist. The survivors deserve more than this; they have all been through so much, but still, each rising they get up to fight again. This compound is a luxury compared to the grass huts we were staying in, and there is a partially working replicator that has helped with sustenance. Nevertheless, because there are so few of us, we have not explored half of this cave system as there is plenty of room in these front tunnels for our needs.”

Ruby gets up out of Slavic’s lap, walking around the room until she stops to peer out of the transparent wall panels. “Kallen said that there were others here like us, other humans?”

“We had been here two lunar rotations when we saw fireballs falling from the sky.

At first, we thought it was either asteroids or an invasion.

When the skies quieted, the scouts went out, and they found four separate pods.

They were closed up tight, and we had no idea how to open them or even if we should.

But the pods started malfunctioning quickly after landing and then started opening on their own.

The females were terrified, but we did our best to help them through the transition and integrated them into the small society we have built here.

Thankfully Ruby, at some point after they had been taken from your home world, someone had given them translators.

I cannot imagine how much harder it would have been for them and us if they had not been able to understand our language. ”

“Oh, it’s a blast, take it from someone who’s experienced that firsthand! Sorry, please go on with your story.” Mam just smiles at Ruby and her playfully flippant quip before turning back toward the rest of us.

“Lunar rotations had passed when, one rising, I saw another human female stumble out of the wood line. Originally, I thought we had missed one of the cryo units, but that was not the case. Ginger arrived in a damaged pod that was stocked with an array of items from her world. Even though she survived the destruction of her planet. She has found little happiness here as she watches the sky every darkness, looking for her mate as they launched at the same time. However, he has not been found so far. She smiles easily, but it never reaches her eyes. I understand more than most the loss of a mate and the struggle to survive in their absence. I have sat with her many a darkness in prayer that her mate be reunited with her. Mine is waiting in the afterlife for me when my time comes, but she is so young it would be a shame for her to live out the rest of her rotations alone. I do believe even if another male took an interest in her, she would never accept his affections as her heart lies elsewhere.”

Mam looks straight at me, and I feel like a squirming youngling.

I see several other Ruks waiting at the doorway, and she motions for them to come into the room.

They carry trays with an array of different foods, and I immediately stand.

“Mam, Kallen has not broken her fast this rising. Can you tell me where Atasha’s room is so that I can retrieve her? ”

She smiles at me, “Three doors down on your right.”

“I will return momentarily.” Stepping out into the long hall, I hurry in the direction mam sent me.

As I approach the entrance, I expect to hear voices behind the hanging curtain which provides some privacy, but instead, there is only silence.

Hesitantly, I step inside, and the familiar smell of mam surrounds me.

Glancing around the space, I take in all the things that have been missing from my own quarters.

The area is sparse, but it still feels like someone’s home.

Seeing a door off to the side, I gently brush back the curtain only to find Atasha and Kallen curled up together on the sleeping platform.

Neither of them moves when I step further into the room and stare down at them both.

Kallen is curled protectively around Atasha while Atasha’s small hands are wrapped tightly around Kallen’s wrist as if she is scared to let go, lest Kallen disappear on her again.

I jerk when a soft hand lands on my shoulder, only to turn and find mam silently motioning for me to come with her. We walk back out into the hall before she says anything.

“That is the first time Atasha has slept on her own sleeping platform since they took Kallen away. I had a time with her when we realized the Velgriddix had taken Kallen, as she blamed herself for not fighting hard enough to get away from them. Kallen has always held a special place in her heart, and she grieved her absence deeply.”

“Kallen is stronger now than she was when we found her on that Velgriddix ship. There are some risings she seems better than others, but lately she appears to be weakening all over again.”

Mam reaches up, tracing the collar I had hoped my vest was hiding the majority of. “Have you considered this might be the cause of her weakened state?”

“No, and I refuse to solidify the bond for reasons I do not wish to discuss.”

My words have more bite to them than I intended, and mam’s face becomes thunderous in her ire. Apparently, my immense size compared to hers does not stop her from smacking me upside the head, making me feel like a youngling all over again.

“Ruarc, you gigantic fool! Since you were little, you have been overly stubborn and quick to distrust, but this time you are throwing away the biggest blessing ever to be bestowed upon our race.”

To say that mam is affronted and disgusted with me is a gross understatement.

“I do not know how to be what she needs, Mam.”

She opens her arms, and even though I tower over her, I tuck my head into her neck, simply enjoying the peace mam’s arms provide.

“Listen to my words and then think on them deeply every time you doubt this blessing. Love is not the flutters you feel in your hearts when you are with someone. It is the brokenness you experience when apart. I did not raise cowardly sons!! You will not run from this and come out as if it never occurred; she will not be the only one broken.”

“Kallen has her collar hidden. How did you know?”

“I am your lifegiver, and it is easy to see the tension between you two. Even though you were listening to my every word earlier, your eyes never stopped watching the door for her entrance.”

“I do not want … to want her.”

“I know. Come sit with me for a moment while your brothers are distracted by the others who wish to speak with them.”

“I have not thought of this in lunar rotations, as life seems to suck your memories from you from time to time. But did you know when I was a youngling, I actually could not stand your sire?”

Shock renders me almost speechless, but after a few tics I find my voice again.

“What?! You always seemed strong in your heartbond.”

“Oh, we were by the time you all came along, but that did not happen overnight.

It took a lot of effort and quite a bit of compromise on both of our parts to make it last and grow.

I remember the first time I saw him, and we were probably not much older than Atasha is now.

He threw mud on my new wrap, and I was so mad I chased him all around the courtyard, ready to scratch his face off.

I can recall him turning quickly, bumping into me so hard we both fell.

When I started crying, he panicked and immediately picked me up.

He just stood there with me in his arms as I fought the tears, refusing to appear weak even though I was upset with him.

I will never forget him looking down at me as he walked to a nearby bench to set me down, saying the words I was convinced marked me on the spot: ‘ Shagar, you will be mine one day ’.

As the rotations continued, he consistently teased and picked on me.

Later, when we were much older, he confided in me that he did not know how to talk to me, so he found other ways to get close.

I remember cuffing him on the back of the head, laughing at all the antics he had pulled when we were younglings, and I was able to see them differently after he revealed that truth about himself.

Your sire was older than me by several lunar rotations, but I recall coming of age and walking past the guard barracks when my collar appeared instantly.

I ran home as quickly as possible because I had no idea what was happening to me.

So, few of us were ever blessed with a heartmate, that I thought it was a fable.

Your sire did not waste any time when he realized what was happening and who had triggered his.

Before my lifegiver could answer half of my questions, he was beating against the door, demanding I come to him.

He was never a patient male, your sire. When I did not immediately fall into his arms, I remember him being furious, even threatening to steal me away if I did not come to him willingly.

Well, you know how it all worked out in the end …

but I did not make it easy on him in the beginning.

Son, what I am trying to say is sometimes the hardest paths forward are the most rewarding.

Come, we will let them rest while we rejoin the others. Your return has blessed this rising, and I am sure the others in the compound would enjoy meeting you all as well. A gathering will be prepared so that we can rejoice in the blessing of my son’s being returned to me.”