Page 100 of Pretty Broken Wings

The earlier fear rushes through me, and my knees feel weak.

“Hey.” Gage catches me, his hands gentle. Before I think about it, I grab Gage’s shirt and pull myself to him, using his body to rest.

For a second, Gage doesn’t move. He’s like a solid wall, firm and strong. But it’s not enough. I want more. Need more. Need that solid strength to feel like it’s a part of me, not just something I can touch but can’t have.

There’s another bang in the kitchen, and I jump.

“It’s okay.” Gage squeezes my shoulders.

Buddy jumps around us, whining. I feel her tension like it’s my own.

“Easy, girl,” Gage says to Buddy, his voice deep and calming. “You’re okay.”

I can’t help the shiver that runs across my skin.

More. I need more. More of that feeling when I kissed him in front of Axel.

Impulsively, I reach up and grab the short hairs on the back of Gage’s neck and pull him down into my face. I care about nothing except calming the confusing feelings rushing through me.

Gage’s breath brushes my lips, and he licks his own, accidentally getting mine in the process. I smash my face into his, kissing him with abandon. I just want to get this ugly feeling out of my chest, and my body is hot. I just want to feel something. To feel a spark of connection, of lust, ofanything.

I kiss Gage harder, feeling the heat curl across my skin. My nipples harden, and when I press my body into his, sensation sparks in my breasts. I press against Gage, pushing him back toward the living room.

He allows it, following where I direct until I shove him back on the couch. There’s a voice in the back of my head screaming that I should think about this. But there’s also another voice, equally as loud if not louder, saying that this is exactly what we need.

I settle on Gage’s lap, pushing him down so he’s lying there.

Gage could fight me. I know he could use his weight to flip me around, pin me down, and take what he wants from me. I see his hands jerk once, then he lifts them up and puts them behind his head. He’s panting, breathing heavily, and I can feel his erection pressing up against his thin PJs and my crotch.

And his eyes. He looks up at me with a look I’ve never seen from him before. It’s like his walls have fallen away, and now I can see the naked desire there. Desire and yearning and a little bit of something I can’t read.

He wants me. Gage wants me.

I suck in a breath, waiting for Gage’s greedy hands to roam all over me. Waiting for him to plow forward like men do, taking what he wants from my body.

But he doesn’t. He waits, pulling in a shaky breath. I feel his dick throb once, and he swallows, his Adam's apple bobbing with the effort. His hands stay behind his head, his biceps bulging.

And still, he doesn’t take.

Gage groans, and it’s a mix between a growl and a moan. His body jerks once, and he tips his head back, exposing his neck to me.

The rush of sensation that tingles from my clit out is insane. I wait for the contempt. The disgust I had with the man in the bathroom stall all that time ago.

But it doesn’t come.

CHAPTER FIFTY-TWO

I want her. I want her so badly, I feel my body shaking against my will. But the way she melts into me? It feels euphoric. Feels like putting on your glasses and seeing the most beautiful sunset. Seeing the details on your dog’s face. It feels like comfort and home.

Just as much as pleasure is there, panic is too. What do I do? After Jess, I could never find someone who didn’t know Axeltoo, and I always took care of my own needs. Now, I’m cursing myself. How do I take care of Raven? I’ve barely had sex. Jess wanted it hard. Wanted me to take her aggressively.

Raven grinds against me, and I bite back a moan. She feels so goddamn good.

There’s movement off to the side, and then Axel’s drunk voice says, “Did he pay you to kisss him?”

Raven stills, stiffness coming back to her body.

Immediately, I want to kill Axel. I want to kill my own brother.