Page 50 of Pretend You Love Me

“Better to be prepared. Will you be angry if I decide against this?”

Angry no. Disappointed as fuck. Yes.

“No,” I say and then shut my mouth.

“Okay,” She stands up and walks over to the sink to wash out her mug. “I’ll let you know in a few days.”

This isn't going to help my focus problem one bit.

Chapter Eleven

Brooklyn

I take the car to go to the library again. I feel weird driving it, but it was part of the deal for the job, and I really need the money. I paid what I owed to have the car towed, and I barely have any money left over.

Rose’s face lights up when she sees me walk through the door. “You’re back.”

“I am. Good morning,” I say.

“Do you want me to get you set up again?”

“I’d love that. Thank you, Rose,” I say.

Once she has everything ready, I sit down at the computer. I don’t start working right away because I’m playing the conversation with Kip in my head over and over again. I’m also playing the two kisses in my head over and over and over and over and over again. I had some wild dreams last night.

I can’t believe I was so candid this morning. That’s not like me. Is it the red hair? The name change?

Brooklyn would never have suggested something like this in a million years. Brooklyn is the sort of person who hides behind other people to stay out of pictures. Brooklyn is the sort who is happy to go along with whatever the rest of her family is doing without a second thought. Brooklyn is the sort of person to follow a man around for years like a puppy dog and never express her emotions until she’s forced to give up because he starts dating her roommate. Ugh.

This isn’t a smart decision. I normally make smart decisions. I take my time. I weigh everything out. I don’t let my emotions drag me around. I’m not impulsive.

Like this escape, I’d planned it for months.

I’m tired of being so responsible and sweet. I don’t want to melt into the background anymore. I always thought I was happy being a wallflower, but I enjoyed being the center of attention last night at the restaurant. I enjoyed being kissed like I was the only woman in the world.

The one thing that’s bothering me is Kip’s response this morning. It was not as enthusiastic as I’d hoped. Last night though, his body was plenty enthusiastic, that’s for damned sure. No wonder he didn’t sleep last night. Poor man was hard as a rock when I sent him away.

I wonder how much longer than a year it’s been for him.

“Ginger!”

I jump when I hear my name and turn to see Hawk walking toward me. He’s all smiles and looks like a sunrise coming toward me.

“Hey Hawk,” I say. I’m relieved I haven’t started any research. The last thing I need is for Hawk to catch wind of why I’m here.

“Is the internet out at the house?” he asks, frowning.

“No, I just needed to look up some things that are just on the library servers.”

He lowers his eyebrows. I’m confusing the heck out of him right now.

“How was your first night? Everyone seemed to like you a lot.”

“It was fun. I’m glad Kip let me do it.”

“Let you?” he asks.

“Oh, you know...the car crash and everything,” I say, quickly.