Page 42 of Pretend Wife (Angels of the Secret Order #4)

THIRTY-ONE

Danielle

The next morning, we all gathered in Sam’s living room.

Micah stood in front of the fireplace while everyone else sat on the semicircle of sofas and armchairs around him. The kids were playing in the corner where their parents could see them, but they weren’t really a part of the meeting.

Piper handed out mugs of coffee and tea before taking her seat beside Sam, who placed a hand on her thigh in a possessive gesture that made my chest ache.

Being there hurt more than I’d expected. Despite the tense atmosphere, there was a certainty between the couples in the room that I envied. They had a kind of peace that existed no matter what else was going on in their lives.

Scott had his arm around Maggie’s shoulders, his thumb stroking her upper arm. And Nate had pulled Sierra onto his lap, his chin resting on top of her head and his arms around her waist.

For several minutes, we all just sat there in a silence it seemed no one wanted to break.

Finally Micah spoke. “Maggie, while we’re waiting for Allison to get here, why don’t you catch everyone up on your side of the story.”

“Okay.” Maggie let out a heavy breath. “Just keep in mind I don’t know very much.

Mom never told me a lot about my real father.

I knew he existed and that he came from a dangerous family.

When I got older and started questioning the things I could do, she told me the truth about him being one of the angels who’d followed Lucifer, fallen from Heaven, and came to rule over Hell, but that he’d changed his mind and regretted his choices.

” She shrugged. “I don’t really know anything else. She didn’t even have a picture of him.”

“And what exactly can you do?” Micah asked.

Maggie glanced at Sam. “The basic half-demon stuff apparently. I was always fast and strong compared to the other kids in my class. Things like languages and debate came easy to me. Supposedly I can sense demonic power, but I’ve never actually met a demon.”

“You’re not missing out, trust me,” Sierra said, prompting Nate to pull her tighter against him.

“Anything else?” Micah asked. “Any gifts you got specifically from your father?”

“Yes. I can see the seal of God on a person’s heart.”

Utter silence followed her words. I’d never heard of anyone having that ability, and glancing around at my family, I didn’t think any of them had either .

“You can see if a person’s soul is claimed by God?” Micah said slowly.

Maggie nodded.

Before anyone could say anything more, a knock sounded from the front door. Piper started to stand, but Sam pulled her back down and stood himself. “Stay here,” he murmured. “I’ll be right back.”

He returned with Allison a second later.

“I can’t find him,” she said. “I’ve tried every contact I have, everything I can think of. I’m almost positive he’s not on Earth at the moment. I don’t think there’s anything we can do but wait for him to get back.”

For the next several hours, we talked about Allison’s relationship with Beelzebub, whom she referred to as Zeb, and how, when she’d gotten pregnant, they’d split up to keep the baby safe. According to Allison, Zeb didn’t trust Heaven or Hell when it came to his daughter.

It made sense, and I could tell my brothers understood where he’d been coming from. Nate and Sam had both been there at one point. There was no easy way to fall in love with a human. I should know.

I glanced down at my phone, checking my messages. Still nothing from Hayden.

My fingers itched to text him even though it didn’t take a genius to figure out he didn’t want to hear from me.

Our last conversation played in my head again. He’d looked so hurt, so betrayed. I would give anything to take that away from him. Being the source of Hayden’s pain was the last thing I wanted.

“Danielle?” The sound of someone saying my name yanked my attention away from my phone .

“What?”

“You and Allison can stay here while Maggie and I are gone?” Micah prompted.

I frowned. “Where are you going?”

“To get Joriel back.”

“What?” I demanded, looking back and forth between Micah and Maggie. He had to be joking. It had been over three years since we’d lost Joriel. He’d made a deal with the Devil before I joined the secret order and had been in Hell ever since Lucifer had collected.

“With Maggie’s ability, we have a chance to save him,” Micah said as calmly as if he were discussing the weather.

“I’m not following.”

“The deal Joriel made gave Lucifer a right to his soul,” Sam said. “We couldn’t just go into Hell and steal him back while his soul belonged to the Devil.”

“But doesn’t it still?”

“Maybe. But there might be a way to reclaim his soul. We’ll only know if we try.”

“And you’re okay with this?” I asked Maggie.

“It feels like the least I can do after what my father did to you.”

“He didn’t actually do anything. I would have healed Hayden and Scott even if he hadn’t been blackmailing me.”

“Still, I want to help your family. You saved my brother’s and husband’s lives. If I can save your brother’s, I want to try.”

“Thank you,” I whispered. In the past three and a half years, I hadn’t allowed myself to think about Joriel too much.

I hadn’t known him for very long, and it didn’t feel like I had a right to miss him the way the rest of my family did.

But the truth was that I did miss him. I wanted him back maybe just as much as my other brothers did.

And I was terrified to hope that it could happen.

Everyone talked about details some more over lunch, and I tried my best to listen, but now that Micah knew everything and was dealing with the situation, I wasn’t really needed.

He and Maggie were going to plan a trip to Hell through some backdoor entrance Nate had once used to sneak in.

Allison and I were going to stay here and wait for Zeb to show up so Allison and Sam could iron out the details of some kind of deal that didn’t include blackmail.

Pretty much, I was just the bait to get the Prince of False Idols to the right place. I didn’t actually have to do anything.

After a while, I got up and headed into the backyard, phone in hand, and dropped onto a lounge chair in the pool area.

For a minute I stared out at the pool, watching the water sparkle under the afternoon sunlight. I wondered if Hayden liked to swim. In the time I’d known him, I’d never seen him in a bathing suit, not even in a photograph. He had the perfect body for swimming, lean and muscular.

My fingers dialed his number before I could talk myself out of it. I just wanted to hear his voice, even if it was just on his answering machine message.

The phone didn’t even ring before his familiar voice came through. “Hey, it’s Hayden, leave a message, or better yet, call my office.”

There was a beep, and I debated hanging up, but instead, I started talking.

“Hi, it’s me. I’m not really sure what to say.

I know you probably don’t want to talk to me, but I miss you and I’m going crazy not knowing if you’re all right.

Are you okay? Can you give me some kind of proof of life?

I’m sorry, Hayden. I know it doesn’t change anything, but I am sorry.

I wish things were different. I wish I were different.

” I sucked in a breath. “I guess that’s all.

Bye.” I hung up, letting the phone drop to my lap as I whispered, “I love you.” Somehow I didn’t feel like I had a right to say that to him at this point.

“Hey.”

I turned to see Nate walking toward me. “Are you here to fetch me?”

“Nope. I’m here to keep you company. I’m not really needed in there at the moment either.”

I lifted my brows. “I find that hard to believe.”

He laughed. “Come on, Dani. You know I’m not going to play any role in making a deal with a grand prince of Hell. I wasn’t exactly born to negotiate with demons.”

“He was technically an angel first.”

“He’s still a ruler of Hell now. It’s pretty much written into my DNA to strike first and ask questions later. As we all saw last weekend. Sorry for going after your sister-in-law, by the way.”

“I’m sorry for calling that meeting. If I’d known she was a half-blood, I wouldn’t have put you both in that position.”

“It’s not your fault. You didn’t know. ”

“I still feel responsible.”

“I know.” He dropped onto the chair beside mine. “Falling in love with a human isn’t an easy road. I think it might be impossible to do so without screwing up at some point.”

“You know, that’s not very comforting.”

He chuckled. “It’s honest though. And both of us should know by now that hard truths are better than pretty lies.

I made the same mistake, you know. I didn’t tell Sierra that children between angels and humans were forbidden before we got together.

I never meant to fall for her, and then I didn’t want to break her heart.

When she found out that I’d been hiding the truth, she was so upset.

She said she didn’t know how to trust me anymore. ”

“Clearly she forgave you.”

“She did, but I didn’t know that she would at the time. I felt her pain through the guardian-angel bond, and it was the worst experience of my life. I would have given anything to do it over again, to make different choices. But that’s not how life works.”

“What if Hayden doesn’t forgive me?”

“Then he never loved you the way you deserve. If he’s right for you, he’ll understand what you were trying to do.

You’re not perfect Danielle—no one really is.

You’re going to make mistakes and so is he.

What matters is that you believe it’s worth it to be together.

And if it’s not, you’re better off letting him go. ”

“But I don’t want to let him go.”

“I could always kidnap him for you.”

I shook my head. “Something tells me that won’t help my case. ”

“Maybe not, but you never know. And I’d enjoy it.”

“Nate, don’t. Promise me.”

“Fine. But don’t give him too much time. If you’re sure he’s what you want, go after him.”

“Is that what you did?”

“Yes.”

“And she forgave you?”

“Yeah, though I had just lost my wings while saving her from a roomful of demons, so that might have helped persuade her.”

We sat in silence for a while after that as I mulled over what Nate had told me.

It was hard to picture Sierra being truly upset with Nate. They’d been such a perfect couple the entire time I’d known them. At least, as perfect as any couple could be.

Nate looked at her like she was his whole reason for living and a bit like he was preparing to jump between her and a bullet. And Sierra had always taken all the divine stuff in stride. She made marrying an angel and mothering a Nephilim look easy.

Did that mean there was hope for me and Hayden?