Page 38 of Pretend Wife (Angels of the Secret Order #4)

TWENTY-EIGHT

Danielle

I couldn’t stop pacing. There were only a few hours left before Hayden and I were heading to Sam’s penthouse above Youngblood.

This was it.

I was going to tell them all the secrets I’d been carrying for years . And while the thought terrified me, there was also a sense of relief somewhere under all the dread. I was so tired of carrying all this on my own. The secrets, the lies, all of it weighed on me like shackles pulling me down.

When the Prince of False Idols cornered me in the hospital, I’d thought I didn’t have any choice but to make the deal and abide by his rules, but maybe that had always been a mistake.

Maybe I should have called this meeting the second my shift ended, or at least as soon as Hayden was discharged.

Instead, I’d let the problem grow and become more complicated.

Now I didn’t just have my brothers and their families to worry about, I had my own husband and in-laws.

If I’d told Micah right away, would things have been different? Could Hayden and I have been different? And then the biggest question of all… If I could do it over again, would I change anything?

It was easy to ponder what-ifs, but when all was said and done, I wouldn’t trade the past two years for anything. No matter what happened today, I would always treasure the time I’d spent being a part of the secret order, the months I got to be with Hayden, the friendships and love I’d received.

I stacked all the books I’d borrowed from Micah in a pile on the desk in my bedroom turned office and sewing room. I wasn’t sure if I should bring them with me tonight. I’d have to give them back to Micah at some point, and I had no idea how things were going to play out at dinner tonight.

Would I be coming back here again?

Micah had implied that he didn’t want to kick me out of the secret order or strip me of my heavenly fire, but that didn’t mean it wouldn’t happen. Micah was bound by rules and laws. He couldn’t just do whatever he wanted.

Once I was sure I’d gathered all the books, I headed outside to the large balcony that offered a view of the river. There were a few chairs and small tables out there, but I ignored them, walking to the glass railing that wrapped around the balcony.

I stared out at the river, debating what I should say tonight.

I didn’t want to miss anything or have this come out wrong.

I needed everyone to know that I never wanted to lie to them, but at the same time I knew keeping all those secrets had been selfish.

I hadn’t wanted to admit to my family the trouble I’d gotten into.

I hadn’t wanted to face Hayden when he learned that I wasn’t human.

And the longer I lied to everyone, the harder it was to come clean.

“Sunday School?” Hayden’s voice called from somewhere inside.

“Out here,” I shouted back, and a second later he was standing next to me.

“What are you doing?”

“Just trying to collect my thoughts. What time is it?”

He checked the thick watch on his wrist. “Almost five. We should probably go in a few minutes.”

“Okay.”

He leaned over to kiss my cheek, but I turned at the last second so his lips landed on mine.

There wasn’t even a second of hesitation before Hayden deepened the kiss, his tongue stroking my lips softly before slipping inside and tangling with mine.

He tasted like coffee and just a hint of something stronger.

His hands dove into my hair, angling my head so he could deepen the kiss further. He kissed me with a desperation that matched mine, like he too knew that things would be different after tonight and didn’t want to waste a second of our time now.

When we finally pulled apart, it wasn’t far, our foreheads still plastered together. Both of us were breathing hard, and my heart pounded like it was trying to come out of my chest and jump into his .

Did the heart have some kind of sixth sense for when it was about to be broken? Did mine know it should abandon ship?

“Any chance we can bail tonight?” Hayden asked half-heartedly.

“I wish.” I wanted nothing more than to let him carry me to our bed and hide in his arms, where I never had to face the world, where I could pretend my house of cards wasn’t seconds from falling. “But I don’t think abandoning both our families is the best idea.”

“They’ll survive.”

“You know they’d just show up here, right?”

He sighed. “Probably. We could pretend not to be home.”

I laughed. “You’re terrible.”

“Maybe. Or maybe I just want my beautiful wife all to myself for the night. I don’t like sharing you with all our siblings, and don’t even get me started on my mother. Sometimes I think she couldn’t care less about me as long as you’re there.”

“That is not true.”

“She doesn’t have coffee dates with me.”

“That’s because you say no every time she invites you to do something.”

“Tomayto, tomahto.”

“Come on.” I rolled my eyes and pushed him back gently. “We need to go. I don’t want your family to get there before us.”

“Fine. But for the record, if this turns into a shit show, I voted we bail.”

“Noted,” I said dryly .

I couldn’t stop fidgeting while Caleb drove us to my brother’s club. I fiddled with the rings around my finger, turning them back and forth until Hayden laid his hand on top of mine.

“You okay?” he asked, and the concern in his brown eyes made my chest tighten.

No, I wasn’t okay. I was about to tell the love of my life that I’d been lying to him, at least by omission, since the day we met.

When I didn’t answer, he brought my hand to his lips, kissing the spot right beside the rings, offering his silent support.

He didn’t let go of my hand as we walked through the dimly lit lobby or during the elevator ride to the top floor.

Sam and Piper were already there when we arrived.

Piper sat on the counter in the kitchen with Sam standing between her legs, their heads bent together as they spoke.

Their daughters’ shrieks of laughter rang out from the living room.

Dion, who was sitting at the table in the dining room right off the kitchen, looked up at the sound of the door opening but turned back to the open book in front of him when he saw it was us.

My nephew was still not nearly as big a fan of me as my nieces were.

“Danielle.” Piper pushed her husband away and slid off the counter to hug me.

“Blake,” Sam said with a nod and held his hand out.

I held my breath as they shook and then glanced at Piper in question. Had she said something to Sam? Convinced him to accept Hayden?

She shrugged and shook her head. Whatever was going on between the two men was only known to them .

“Thanks for letting us use your apartment,” Hayden said even though he wasn’t the one who had decided to have this multifamily dinner.

“It’s no problem.” Sam’s eyes landed on me, contemplation and curiosity swimming in their depths.

I resisted the urge to fiddle with my rings again as nerves shot through me and a ball of dread took up residence in the back of my throat.

Micah was the next to arrive, then Allison and Robert. Everyone chatted and made small talk, but I couldn’t bring myself to say anything.

Hayden wrapped his arms around me from behind and I leaned back against his chest, thankful for his support even if I felt like an awful person for drawing comfort from him when this night was going to suck for him just as much as it would for me.

Miles and Nate and his family arrived at the same time, Miles bearing wine that I gratefully began pouring for everyone.

Now we were just waiting for Maggie and Scott.

And the food.

Along with offering us use of his apartment, Sam had arranged for food from his extremely popular restaurant La Belle Notte , which took up the second floor of the building, for our dinner. Ian was supposed to bring it up later.

After giving me a hug, Nova and Dion disappeared into the bedroom in the back, and Sam’s daughters followed after them like little minions.

It was probably better they weren’t here for my story about Beelzebub anyway.

Though I was sure Dion and probably Nova would still be able to hear me if they chose to listen.

There were some downsides to having children with angelic hearing.

There was a knock on the door, and Hayden left my side to let his sister in.

Maggie and Scott rounded the corner into the living room, and for a second everything seemed to pause while a strange and uncomfortable energy built in the room.

And then all hell broke loose.

Nate stepped in front of Sierra. Blood-red wings burst from his back, ripping through his shirt and curving back so they shielded his wife as much as possible. His green eyes were locked on Maggie, his lips peeled back in a snarl.

“Who the fuck are you?” he demanded, his body tensing like he was preparing to jump into a fight. I saw the moment he decided to move, half a second before he dropped to a crouch and pulled one of his knives from his boot.

“Don’t!” I shouted, jumping in front of Maggie, my own wings unfurling and creating a barrier between the two of them. “Nate, stop. What is going on?”

“She’s a demon,” he spat out, not taking his eyes off Maggie.

I opened my mouth, but no sound came out.

Nate was born a sixth-order angel—he had the ability to sense demonic and angelic power.

It was a skill I didn’t possess. I glanced toward Sam, who shared Nate’s ability.

He was standing at the entrance of the hallway leading to the bedroom.

His wings weren’t out, but I recognized the defensive position he was standing in.

He was guarding the kids. He felt it too.

But Maggie couldn’t be a demon. I’d seen her emotions, so she had to be at least partially human. And she looked so much like Allison—they obviously shared DNA.

“She’s not.” Allison’s voice cut through the tension in the room. “She’s a half-blood.”