Page 13 of Personal Foul (The San Diego Storm #3)

Carson

I t was not supposed to be like this.

Monday morning, I woke early after a night of restless sleep.

I hadn’t been able to get comfortable, and even though I’d washed my sheets and aired out my room, I could still smell Colin everywhere.

I’d read that the brain stores smell and emotions as one memory, which meant that every time I got close to him, my brain would be inundated with memories.

With training camp starting up, and us sharing a room, it would be physically painful.

Spending the night with him hadn’t quelled my desire like I’d hoped.

It had only intensified the pull I felt toward him.

I had a lot to do, and lying in bed brooding about Colin would solve nothing. My parents were arriving this afternoon, and Bella and I needed to run. So I climbed out of bed, threw on athletic shorts and a sleeveless T-shirt, then headed downstairs to find my shoes.

When I was ready to go, Bella met me at the back door, eager to get outside.

“Let’s go girl,” I crooned, rubbing her head.

She barked and pushed by me to get outside.

“What’s the hurry?” I called after her. But I found what she was after.

Colin stood on the pool deck, hair messily rumpled, appearing as exhausted as I felt. Shirtless, his tight Sydney Swarm rugby shorts sat low on his hips, exposing the rock-hard abdominal muscles and cum gutters. He was unintentionally living, breathing porn, and my fucking weakness.

My heart gave an extra throb, forcing me to divert my eyes. Thank god I needed to close the door.

When I turned back to them, he had squatted down to pet her while she licked his face. She was as enamored as I was.

I stared at him for as long as I could until he turned and smirked at me. Yeah, I was busted. But who could blame me?

Walking closer, I kept a few feet between us. Clenching my fists, I propped them on my hips, then smiled down at him.

“Morning. You’re up early. I thought you might sleep in.”

Okay, nice casual conversation. I could do this.

He smiled at her, then up at me. “Yeah, my time zones are still a bit messed up. I’m trying to acclimate before we leave.”

I was a bit messed up, too.

“Are you sleeping okay? Is the bed comfortable?”

I curled in my lips and covered them with my fingers to stop my blabbering, but that didn’t help.

“I mean, is the bed comfortable enough? Or is it keeping you from resting?”

He smirked. “You’re cute when you lose your cool. Are you flirting with me?”

I shook my head. “No, I’m not. I’m simply asking about your comfort as my guest.”

Colin laughed and stood up. “The bed is fine, Carson. Not as comfortable as yours, but good. But that might have had something to do with you being in it. But, the more time I spend in it, the better it’ll get.”

I didn’t need a reminder of him in my bed, because it was on a continuous loop in my head.

Nodding, I needed to put some distance between us before I made a colossal mistake and reached for him. My only outlet was the beach, so I headed to the steps that led to the sand.

“Okay. Let’s go, Bella,” I called.

Colin chuckled and crossed his arms over his chest. “Where are ya going?”

I raised a brow at him. “To run, obviously.”

I was being a dick, but I couldn’t help it. Completely out of my depth, I didn’t know how to handle all these conflicting feelings.

Colin quickly glanced at the beach, then back at me. “I see grumpy Carson is back, so don’t let me keep you.”

His eyes skimmed over me before hitting me with the smile that turned me inside out. It was the same unguarded expression from when I fucked him.

Scrubbing my hands over my face, I released a frustrated groan. “Ugh. We can’t go to training camp like this.”

Colin propped his hands on his hips as his brows drew together. “Like what?”

I motioned between us, almost feeling manic. “Like this. The tension between us is stifling. We’re like two star-crossed lovers, pining for each other.”

His eyes showed a flicker of what I felt before he shut it down. I wanted to grab him and kiss the fuck out of him. But I couldn’t do that.

“This was a mistake. We should never have done this.”

My heart ached with every vile word as I watched him harden toward me. I knew my words had hurt, but they’d also injured me. They felt wrong, but for all the right reasons.

His spine stiffened, and the warmth in his eyes died out. I was prepared for him to set me straight and tell me I was full of shit. I wanted him to fight for us, even though it was against the rules. I’d made it painfully clear we couldn’t have each other.

But what I got was indifference, and that hurt even more.

The smile I’d seen on the videos and recognized as his self-preservation returned. If I hadn’t seen the vulnerable side of him, I would have mistaken this side for who he really was. This wasn’t my Colin. It was a facade he used to protect himself.

“There’s nothing to regret, mate. It was just a fuck. And it’s forgotten.”

He smiled at Bella. “Have a good run. I’ve got some things to do.”

He turned to walk away but stopped, then pivoted back to me. “When you get back, I’m gonna need the address here for some deliveries. And when I invite a friend or two over.”

Colin winked, then strode back into the guesthouse and closed the door.

If he were trying to make a point, I’d gotten it. Loud and clear.

This was going to be the longest six months of my life.

By the time my parents arrived late that afternoon, I was packed and ready to go.

“Hey. How was your flight?”

“Wonderful.” My father patted my shoulder. “First class really is a splendid way to fly. Thank you for that.”

“It’s the least I could do,” I said.

Bella came bounding at the sound of his voice. She could always count on him for extra playtime.

“There’s my girl!”

While he loved on my dog, I hugged my mother. “How are you, Mom? Thanks for coming.”

“Hello, sweetheart. Are you kidding? I love my two-week vacation on the beach. I just wish you were here longer.”

My mother, Elizabeth St. James, was a fifty-six-year-old civil law attorney before she accepted her first appointment as a U.S.

Ambassador to Scotland. She’d met my barrister father, George, in London while visiting the UK after law school.

To hear them tell it, they fell madly in love at first sight, and when it was time for my mother to go home, my father lasted two weeks before applying for a job in the States to be with her.

Closing the door, I grinned. “You can always stay longer. I’d love for you to be here for the pre-season.”

She patted my face. “Me too. We’ll see how it goes.”

Moving back and forth between countries had become very familiar to me when I was a teenager. I suspect that’s why I loved being in one spot here in San Diego.

“I’ll take your bags upstairs while you settle in.”

Bounding up the stairs, I put their luggage in the other guest room that overlooked the ocean. When I came back down, I found my mother in the kitchen.

I went to the wine refrigerator where I kept my beer and pulled out a bottle of Napa Valley Chardonnay.

“Would you like a glass of wine?”

“Yes, please. I didn’t have one on the plane, hoping you’d have my favorite here.”

“I wouldn’t dare invite you here without it.”

I opened the wine, then let it breathe while I collected her glass. Looking around, I noticed my father was missing.

“Where’s Dad?”

“He’s gone down to the beach with Bella. It’s all he’s been talking about this morning. That and the rugby player.”

I poured the wine but didn’t comment on her statement.

“He’s dying to meet him. You know how he is about the sport.”

Nodding absently, I went to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of electrolyte water. Cracking the lid, I turned it up and gulped it down. But I felt the heat of her stare on my skin. It was only a matter of time before she read me like a book.

“When do we get to meet your houseguest?”

The seemingly innocuous question sparked a vivid memory I had been trying to forget. Turning toward the pool, my thoughts snagged on the memory of him telling me exactly what he wanted from me and completely missed her calling my name.

“I’m sorry. What did you say?”

My mother assessed me, then repeated her question. “I asked when we would get to meet Mr. Kearney? Your father has been reading everything he can find about him signing with the Storm. You know he’s a rugby nut.”

My stomach roiled at houseguest and signing . Two innocent little words that had landed me in trouble.

“Um, he hasn’t signed yet. Not until after training camp.”

I squinted back out the window. “You can meet him later. I’m not sure where he is.”

My eyes darted around the room, searching for any topic to get her off this one. But nothing came to mind. Nothing but how I’d fucked up.

“What’s wrong, Carson?”

Resigned to move away from the topic, I pasted on a smile, even though I knew she would see right through me. “Nothing. What makes you think something’s wrong? Nothing’s wrong. Everything is fine. Great, even.”

I needed to shut the fuck up. All I’d accomplished was to trip her double lie detector wires, which she owned like a boss, being both an attorney and a mother.

After re-corking the bottle, I walked around and sat beside her at the island.

“This deep line right here,” she said, running her thumb over the wrinkle forming between my eyes, “says something isn’t alright. And you keep looking out there. Did something happen?”

Yeah, Mom. He’s already ruined me and I can’t have him.

Sighing, I leaned forward on my elbows and told her part of the truth. “I said something I shouldn’t have.”

My gaze automatically went to the window again. “And I think I offended him.”

She peered over her shoulder at the pool deck. “I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think.”

That made me laugh. “It was upsetting. I mean, if he’d said it to me, I wouldn’t appreciate it.”