Page 4 of Paper Flowers (Stonebrook #1)

I look at Sadie. She’s drawing a garden of flowers on the whiteboard. “Hey Caleb, Sadie just finished telling me about her day. She met a girl with the same first name as her middle name. She seemed to have a nice day today.”

Caleb paused a bit before he spoke. “Yeah, she mentioned her and her mom have the same middle name and that made her a bit emotional. She excused herself to get her water bottle, but I noticed she was crying quietly next to the wall of backpacks.”

What? She cried today? My tie suddenly feels like it is suffocating me. I dig my pointer finger in between my collar and tug at my tie to loosen it.

Before I respond, I turn my back towards Sadie to shield the phone call. “Wait— what happened? Talking about her mom made her cry? She hasn’t cried in a few weeks. I thought she was making progress here. “What else did she say to you? How was she the rest of the day?”

“Hey, I know this may be a lot to process, but she composed herself really well. She only said talking about her mom reminded her that she won’t be there when she gets home today.

That she won’t be able to tell her about her first day and her new friend.

I called Mr. Carter, the psychologist, shortly after.

He said he would like to meet with you to gauge where Sadie’s emotions have been lately.

Do you have time this afternoon? I know we just got out of class and it’s short notice? ” Caleb asked.

“This afternoon? It’s just Sadie and I. Her grandparents are four hours away.” I replied.

“Sadie, can wait in the office with Mrs. Emily if you like? She’s great at getting the students to help her. I am sure she wouldn’t mind hanging out with her for a few minutes,” Caleb suggested.

I have to remember it takes a village and maybe this will be a good start. So, I replied, “Well, okay. If she doesn’t mind watching her for a bit, I’ll meet with Mr. Carter in a few minutes. Thank you for watching out for my little girl.”

“Luke, Sadie seems like a really great kid, and from what I got to see today, she’s a bright student.

Her feeling the sadness of her mother’s loss has to be difficult to navigate through.

I will let Mr. Carter know you’ll be stopping by shortly.

I’ll catch up with you later. I hope everything works out.

Have a good evening, Luke!” Caleb ends the phone call and I take a seat back in my desk chair.

I feel like my chest is tightening again and I can’t seem to get a hold of myself. I thought of everything for the first day of school except for the part when we get home .

A few minutes pass and I begin to breathe a little better. I hear the text tone that belongs to Nina.

Nina: Hey Slugger, can we FaceTime tonight? We want to hear all about Sadie’s first day. I love you both!

Nina has been calling me slugger since Juliette first introduced me to her parents. They knew I played college baseball, and they loved going to my games with her.

I quickly respond.

Once we get home and settled in, Sadie and I will FaceTime you and William. Talk to you soon. We love you too !

I look over at Sadie and my whiteboard is now covered in flowers and greenery.

She is so artistic and she definitely gets that trait from her mother.

She stops and sees me admiring her work and says, “Tada! What do you think of all my flowers? Was that my grandma texting you?” I stand up and walk over to her and I say, “I absolutely love my garden of flowers! Your grandma wants us to FaceTime her later.” She smiles at me and I know that makes her excited.

She hands me back the capped markers and box to me.

I put the expo markers back in their box and said, “Alright Sadie Girl, we have to get our things and head up to the front office. You’re going to hang out with Mrs. Emily for a few minutes while I talk to Mr. Carter.

” I wonder if that is any relation to our Vice Principal?

Sadie stares at her work one last time before she grabs her backpack and lunch pail.

I have my own backpack and travel mug in my hand, and together we walk over to the front office.

Mrs. Emily has a stack of paperwork that almost towers over her as if it’s the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Student Registration and Emergency Cards are laid out and ready to be inputted by her. I almost don’t want to bother her with all the work she has to do.

Without looking up, she says, “Mr. Carter is expecting you. Why don’t you head on over to his office and Miss Sadie and I can staple some announcement handouts for tomorrow?

” I’m shocked she knew it was us. But then again, she has been here 30 years.

She knows who walks in and out of this place so naturally.

I help Sadie with her backpack and lunch pail as she pulls up a seat next to Mrs. Emily.

I give her a quick kiss on the top of her head and whisper, “See you soon, Sadie Girl.” She looks up at me and smiles.

I walk down the hall and Mr. Carter’s office is the second door to the left.

I noticed the door was slightly ajar, so I knocked softly and said, “Mr. Carter? Hi, it’s Luke Beckett.

Sadie’s father.” Mr. Carter stands up out of his office chair and motions for me to take a seat in front of his desk.

He is nearly as tall as I am, about 6’2 and he must have been a track star back in his college years.

The track medals and awards displayed underneath his master’s degree on his bookcase are quite impressive. His hair is blonde and clean cut.

He sits back down in his chair and says happily “Hey Luke, it’s really nice to meet you.

Caleb tells me you’re the new third-grade teacher and your daughter, Sadie, is in his class this year.

” As I’m sitting in this chair across from him, my heart feels like it’s tightening.

I’m about to talk about my daughter and how we have been living without my wife for nearly a year, this is absolutely going to break me down.

I clear my throat and tell him “Yes, I am one of the new hires. I moved here about a month ago and we’re settling in alright. Caleb told me about Sadie’s breakdown this morning and it made me feel like a total jerk for not realizing how Sadie will truly feel about today.”

Mr. Carter started writing something down and I realized maybe Sadie won’t be the only one talking to him. He placed the pen back on the desk and asked “Luke, do you mind if I ask how your wife died? Has Sadie experienced any loss before? Any close friends or family members?”

I feel like it gets harder each time I have to explain it to someone.

I tell him how it happened and I tell him how it was the most painful thing in my life having to tell my daughter her mother died.

How she cried for hours and tried to run out of the house to find her.

It fucking wrecked me. I didn’t realize how much of it I was holding it in until I spoke to Mr. Carter.

He told him to call him Dean. I felt the knot in my throat and I myself wanted to cry.

I held it in because this is for Sadie and I can cry later in the privacy of my own home.

Although the atmosphere here in this school is so inviting and welcoming, it’s almost healing.

After our quick meeting, Dean stands up to walk me out.

I shake his hand and ask him “When will you speak to Sadie? How do the meetings with you work?” Dean leans against his desk and crosses his legs at his ankles and says “I will speak to Sadie sometime in the upcoming week. What I like to do is pull the student out of class and walk around the campus and through the halls. I like to get to know them before we dive into the hard questions. I type it up on my laptop. If you would like to mention to Sadie that she will be talking to me before I introduce myself that is solely up to you. I think it will help her better prepare for our meetings.”

With everything Dean just said I take a deep breath.

I know this will help Sadie but I can’t seem to shake the feeling she won’t see it the way I do.

I decided I will let her know she will be seeing Dean this week and leave the choice up to her if she wants to talk about Juliette.

I put my hands in my pockets and tell him “I’ll talk to her soon.

Thank you for your support. I really appreciate it.

” Dean smiles and replies “You’re welcome, I am here for you as well.

It was nice meeting you, Luke. See you around. ”

As I am walking out of Dean Carter’s office I hear a familiar voice I haven’t heard since I was 18 years old.

There is absolutely no way I am hearing her voice right now.

I approached the front desk slowly, there she stood, Dayna Evans.

She had her side profile to me and wears her dark brown straight hair just above her shoulders now.

What struck me most was the way Sadie was smiling up at Dayna. It wasn’t just any smile— no, it was the kind that lit up her little hazel eyes, a glimmer so bright it almost sparkled.

It had been so long since my little girl smiled like that, it took my breath away.

I almost forgot what it felt like to see her so happy.

My eyes began to well up at the sight of Sadie’s joy— God, I had missed this more than I realized.

Sadie looked past Dayna and said “Daddy, look what Ms. Carter made me!” She held a paper flower in her hands.

At that very moment, Dayna turned herself around and her face dropped several shades when her whiskey-colored eyes met mine.