Page 17 of Paper Flowers (Stonebrook #1)

It wrecks me that my mother never left my father when she had the chance but she always saw the good in people.

How he had any good left in him, is beyond me.

I miss my mom every day and it hurts Sadie never met her.

Liam and I make sure her burial site is well kept and has fresh flowers delivered weekly.

Liam dropped everything to be by my side the minute I called him about Juliette. He helped me with the funeral arrangements and got the legal matters taken care of. I don’t know how I would have survived that first week without him.

I know I lucked in with Juliette’s family. I have a great relationship with my in-laws. They welcomed me with open arms and I felt an instant connection with William and Nina. They have never missed an opportunity to be there for me or my daughter.

“Wow, I never thought they’d retire. I remember them being on vacation only one time when we were together. Are they enjoying their free time? I’m glad to hear your grandma is doing well. She has always been so witty and hilarious.”

“Delaney and Elliot Evans are loving every minute they are on vacation. They call now and then to check in. I told them you were here, and they were shocked to hear your name again. They said they liked you better than Dean. But that will stay between us.”

Smiling at the thought of her parents liking me more feels surprisingly good.

“I can see your smirk from here, Luke. They adored you so much. Dean on the other hand. That is a different story.” I can hear her flipping through a book.

I picture her on the sofa with her legs crossed with a coffee-table book draped over her thighs.

“Well, lucky for you, I have time. If you want to tell me a little about it.”

Siri calls out the directions to my in-laws and I have about an hour and 45 minutes until I get there.

“So as you know, we divorced. We both wanted different things. We were married for six years but the last two years of our marriage wasn’t a marriage at all.

It was more like a couple of roommates. We stopped being intimate long before we separated.

I was fine with that because I couldn’t stomach the thought of him touching me, he made me feel disgusted with myself. ”

I grip the steering wheel a little harder as she spoke. I know what she looks like underneath me and I can’t imagine someone looking at her and making her feel disgusted. She should have felt beautiful and loved. I lean forward and stretch my back before I say anything to her.

“Dayna— I am so sorry. We don’t need to talk about this. We can talk about something else.”

“No, it’s fine, you told me about your life, I want to tell you about mine.”

With a little deep breath she continues on, “I…I wanted Dean and I to have a baby. But as you seemed to figure some of it out on your own, he didn’t want one.

I knew when we got married, having children wasn’t what he wanted.

But as the years went on, I felt like something in my soul was missing.

I eventually talked to him about how I was feeling and he turned me down.

Wouldn’t budge. Nothing.” I can hear her hesitation but she continues on.

“I never mentioned this to Cara but one night, I was putting our laundry away. I had Dean’s socks, so I opened his drawer and a box of condoms were at the bottom.

It was opened, and some were missing from the pack.

We had no use for them because I was on the pill.

I must have moved something else in the drawer because he asked if I had been messing around with his things.

I told him about the socks and how I saw the box of open condoms. He lied straight to my face.

He said he wanted to start wearing condoms because he didn’t want to rely solely on my birth control pills anymore.

As if he bought the pack for us when there were condoms missing. ”

“He didn’t even ask me how I felt about it.

He made the decision all on his own. I would have been okay with it if he would have just talked to me in the first place.

I felt like he didn’t trust me, as if I would do something on purpose.

I would never do something like that. I felt like I was married to a stranger.

After that night I suspected he was cheating on me and I went to the doctors to get checked.

Everything came back clean, and I swore to myself I would never have sex with him again.

That was almost three years ago. I knew I should’ve filed for the divorce, but I was too drained to fight.

It was quick because it’s what he wanted, and I didn’t have the strength to argue.

My ex-husband always goes after what he wants relentlessly, and if challenged, it’s a war.

I didn’t have the energy for a fight, or to care anymore. ”

Fuck! I just want to climb through this phone and reach down to hug her.

I know exactly how hard it was for someone to bring up the conversation about children.

Juliette was the one to bring up kids when we got married.

I remember the day we discussed it, she was so nervous, she cried when I said I was ready whenever she was.

The relief on her face when we both agreed to start trying is one I’ll always remember.

We were the lucky ones to get pregnant right away.

Juliette wasn’t even late when she took a spontaneous pregnancy test on the morning of New Year’s day.

It was positive and Sadie was in our arms nine months later.

I cannot even fathom someone cheating on Dayna.

But the fact that she didn’t want any confrontation just shows how done she was with him.

Since she never asked him, it could be speculation and a misunderstanding but who am I fucking kidding.

You don’t have an open box of condoms on the bottom of your sock drawer for the hell of it.

I’m so glad she got herself checked, I hate that he put her life at risk and if he would have given her anything— I would beat the fuck out of him.

“I’m so sorry you went through that with him. I wish I could be there to give you a hug. Juliette and I had our struggles with things but I could never imagine treating her in such a way. If I’m being completely honest with you, I’m glad you’re no longer with him. You are so much better off.”

“It’s still taking me a while to come to terms with where my life is at. I’ve accepted the reality of not being a mother but I won’t lie to you, it hurts deep down on certain days.”

“You have accomplished so much and you’re making all the plans you had in high school happen. For what it’s worth, I am so proud of you, Dayna.” Hearing her laugh through her sniffles makes me feel like we’re healing each other in an odd way.

Siri announces I am about 20 minutes away from my in-law’s house. I take a peek at Sadie and she’s slowly waking up. Her travel pillow is now sideways between her and the window.

“I am so glad we had this conversation, it was a heavy one but I feel like I’m starting to get to know you all over again.”

“I’m happy we had a chance to talk. I know there’s still more to talk about but it’s been a great start. I know you should be arriving at your in-laws soon, so I’ll let you go. If you need anything, please call or text me.”

“I couldn’t agree more. I’m sure I’ll be texting you this weekend. Talk to you soon, Evans.”

Once we hung up, I pulled the AirPod out of my left ear and placed it back in the case.

I looked at the rearview mirror and I could see Sadie smiling at me.

“Daddy, who were you talking to?” I told her I was talking to Dayna, and she wanted to know who that was.

“Ms. Carter’s first name is Dayna, and she’s my friend.

Like Ms. Davis and Mr. Grant.” She turns her head to look out the window and her smile is gone.

Is she okay that I was on the phone with her?

“Sadie, are you upset with me talking to her?” I wait for her answer as I park outside Nina and William’s house.

“No, I’m not upset, I wish I could have said hi to her too.”

“How about this, next time I talk to her, I’ll pass you the phone so you can talk too?”

“You promise?”

“Yes, Sadie Girl— I promise. ”

We unbuckle and Sadie opens the passenger side door and jumps down. I get out and I grab our bags from behind the driver seat.

Sadie runs from the truck and up the porch steps to the Anderson’s family home. I trail behind her and I can hear Nina’s voice as she’s opening the front door for us. “William! They’re home!” God it feels nice to hear her voice in person.