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Chapter Twenty-Three

“ Y ou didn’t have to wait for me,” Claire said as she wearily got out of her car to see Josiah standing on the porch steps.

The roof was still held up by two-by-fours, but he leaned against the post with his arms over his chest.

He started coming down the steps as she got out. “I wasn’t really waiting on you. I spent the last couple of days working as hard as I could on the kitchen, and I kind of wanted to see what you thought about it.”

“Is it finished?” she asked, slamming the door shut and feeling tired to her very bones.

Her kids were in Boston, and her husband had surprised both of them with new phones, without checking with her, of course.

They had originally decided that their kids would be sixteen before they would be allowed to have iPhones, and Dan was only ten.

But she supposed this was the way parenting went when a couple split up. Everything they’d agreed on went out the window too. She wasn’t sure. She didn’t like the fact that her kids had phones, but she did like the fact that Lana had messaged her and let her know that they had arrived safely.

She had both of their numbers and had asked them to check in with her every day.

Whether they would or not, she wasn’t sure, but she was going to try to enforce that. She would have set that up before they left if she would have realized what her husband was going to do.

“It’s not done, but I’d like you to look at it,” Josiah said, coming down and stopping in front of her. “Did you have a good trip?”

“Yeah. I have a surprising amount of peace about this. I hated to see my children leave, but yeah, I have peace.” She’d had that same peace through her grandmother’s funeral, the graveside service, and the mingling at the viewing as well.

She was almost looking forward to the summer. And Josiah was the reason.

“Well, then let’s go see the kitchen.”

“Could you wait a moment, please?” she asked, putting a hand on his forearm.

He stopped immediately.

“I have a confession to make.”

“Okay?” he said, sounding curious and confused at the same time.

He turned but did not move closer to her.

She supposed that he was respecting her space.

Or maybe respecting the fact that she’d had a lot of things happen to her in the last week—the last year—and maybe he was thinking that she needed to have time to recover.

Taking her children to Pennsylvania had been hard, and maybe she shouldn’t make any rash decisions after such painful things had happened, but she’d been leaning toward this before anything had happened to her grandma and before her kids left.

“I lied to you,” she said, looking up at him, thankful for the porch light which shone on their faces, allowing her to see his expression.

It had been brutal driving to Pennsylvania yesterday and back today.

It had been even more brutal saying goodbye to her children.

They’d eaten breakfast together, a late one, since Ted was not an early riser, which was just fine with her, because the hotel pool had been open, and she and the kids had taken an early morning swim while he slept.

She’d cherished every second. Anyway, after their late breakfast, she had watched them go, kissing them and telling them she loved them without crying, but it had been a little while before she’d been able to get in her car and see where she was going through the tears.

“You lied to me?” he asked, narrowing his eyes, maybe not looking annoyed exactly but definitely confused.

“Yeah. You remember that truth or dare game? And our kiss?” She didn’t know whether she should say this or not. But she’d decided on the way home that her new beginning was going to include her being brave about certain things. This was one of those things.

“I guess we’ve established the fact that I had some pretty fond memories around that. I understand that you don’t.”

“That’s just it. I lied to you. I really, really liked that kiss.

I talked about it for months afterward. I really wanted another one.

I wanted more. But… I guess you just weren’t part of the clique that I was in in high school, and I decided that…

I don’t know. But it was the best kiss I’d ever had. ”

“Maybe that’s because it was your first one,” he said, and she could almost see the thoughts whirling through his head as he softened toward her, and his free hand came up and landed on her shoulder. She thought maybe he knew where she was going with this.

“I don’t know. I do know that you were the first boy I’d ever kissed, and… I was hoping that you would also be the last.”

It wasn’t exactly a marriage proposal, but it was letting him know how she felt. Kind of. In an almost-brave kind of way.

He swallowed, almost like his throat was dry and he needed to force his throat to work.

“Yeah. I like that idea.” He smiled a little and then said, “Almost as much as I like the idea that you were my first kiss, and I’d like for you to be my last.”

She smiled. That was what she was hoping he would say.

“I…know you don’t need any practice. You were really good the first time. But I thought maybe I needed some. Do you mind?” she asked, taking a brave step forward and putting her hand around his neck, pressing against him and tugging down at the same time.

“I don’t mind at all. In fact, I feel like you’re wrong. I do need a little practice. Maybe a lot of practice. Maybe a lifetime’s worth of practice.”

“Yeah. That’s what I thought too.”

She wasn’t sure whether he lowered his head, or she forced him to, or maybe she just stretched really high on her tiptoes, but somehow they were kissing, and it was perfect, just like the last time. The first time.