Page 117 of Out on a Limb

“I don’t see how I could fit in the assassin storyline.”

“We absolutely love the assassin storyline and Helena’s backstory. But the thing is, we don’t think it would play well with these changes. We’re taking the material in a new direction, so you can go ahead and drop that whole plotline, and drop the struggles with her daughter and ex-husband. She’s just a chef who’s unlucky in love. So it’d be likeNotting HillmeetsThe American President, but with Arlo’s signature brand of humor.”

Cameron’s eyes bulged. He saw his reflection in his computer screen and imagined Malcolm’s was similar. He didn’t get how this script that everybody loved was devolving into dreck.

“But what about the grittiness and Helena’s character arc?” Malcolm asked. “This is a dark character study, not some trite romantic comedy.”

“Scripts evolve in development. That’s part of the creative process.”

“There’s nothing creative about this!”

“This is moviemaking, Malcolm.” Arthur remained aggressively pleasant, like a salesperson desperate to make a sale. “You should be excited. The biggest comedy star wants to make your movie.”

“This is not my movie. I spent two years crafting this script. You’re turning Helena into a generic love interest. That’s notMakeshift Coriander!”

“About that,” Arthur said. “Makeshift Corianderdoesn’t really go with the new direction we’re taking. Marketing was batting around new titles, and we’re going to go withSteve of the Union. And we’re going to change the president’s name to Steve.”

“Are you kidding me? What have you done to my script?” Malcolm yelled. “You said you loved it and didn’t want to change a word. You said it was Oscar-quality. Now you want to make it another Arlo Falconer piece of shit comedy?”

“Malcolm, this is the movie business. You think you’re the first writer to get his precious script changed? We bought this script and can do what we want with it. If you don’t like it, we can bring in new writers. Your choice.”

Malcolm didn’t say anything back. Arthur poked his head out to check that Cameron hadn’t accidentally dropped the call.

“Malcolm, buddy? You there?” Arthur asked.

“When do you need the revisions by?” Malcolm sounded hollowed out, sufficiently pummeled into submission.

When the call ended, Cameron tried going back to answering email, but he couldn’t focus. He pulled up theMakeshiftscript, scrolled to a random page, and marveled at the sharp dialogue and tight scenes. He didn’t get it.

He knocked at Arthur’s office door. Arthur was watching music videos on YouTube.

“Some call, right?” Arthur said.

“I thought you liked theMakeshiftscript,” Cameron said. He felt hurt for Malcolm.

“I do. This is development. It’s my job to take great scripts and turn them into successful movies. A movie likeMakeshift Corianderwould’ve flopped at the box office. We saved it.”

“We savaged it.”

Arthur shot out of his chair. His eyes narrowed into black bullets. Cameron’s heart stopped for a moment.

“You’ve been on my desk for a few months and you think you know better than me? We’re not running a fucking charity here. The movies we develop need to turn a profit.”

“You loved theMakeshiftscript, and you let Arlo steamroll it.”

“Because Arlo will give us a hit movie. Cameron, you are here to listen, not speak. Right now, you are my assistant. Your job is making sure my calendar is how I want, making sure I have the files I need when I need them, and making sure I have a coffee in my hand when I ask for it!” Arthur threw a disposable coffee cup past Cameron’s head. It exploded against the wall and coffee splattered onto the floor.

Cameron froze in place. A part of him wondered if he’d make it out of here alive.

“Relax, Cameron. There was barely any coffee in there. Call maintenance and get this cleaned up.”

Cameron returned to his desk. People went about their business around him, pretending they didn’t hear a word, but he felt the spotlight was on him.

Another assistant, once she was done rolling calls with her boss, came by with a glass of water for Cameron. “Don’t worry about it. We’ve all been yelled at. Welcome to the club.”

Cameron took a sip. “Some club.”

She told him that this would be forgotten by lunch. “And Arthur wasn’t really that angry. Trust me, I’ve seen him angry.”