Page 33 of Out of Bounds (Atlanta Demon Series #4)

Flipping through the mail, I tossed all of the bills in one pile and pushed them off to the side.

One of the things Kreed made sure to include in our divorce proceedings was that he would still be responsible for the bills at the house.

The luxury of not having to pay a bill was something that I appreciated.

Don’t get me wrong; if he had decided not to continue paying, I had no problem taking them over.

Tonight, the Demons were playing the Bills at home, and since I hadn’t been to a game yet, I decided I would be the one to take the kids to this one.

Well, I didn’t exactly decide. Maddie Claire sort of made the decision for me when she asked if I could take them to the game instead of them going with Jream.

I hesitated for a few minutes before agreeing to it.

Since the divorce was finalized, I hadn’t stepped foot in the Demons stadium and really didn’t plan on it before I was suckered by a child.

Hell, I’d even left the WAGS Association.

I wasn’t beat for the sympathetic stares or the whispers, so I’d intentionally separated myself.

My plan for the night was to slip in and out unnoticed.

When Jream and Koya found out that I was attending the game, both of them decided that they would sit in the suite with us so I wouldn’t have to be alone. I appreciated that because I genuinely didn’t know how I would feel being there once I was there.

“Masai, these were just delivered for you,” my mom announced as she stepped into the kitchen, carrying an arrangement of flowers.

“Awww. Who are these from?”

“Check out the card.” She smirked and placed them on the counter in front of me.

I stared at her in confusion before plucking the card off the stick.

A smile spread across my face when I read the note.

The flowers were a gift from Lam, who knew how much I was dreading attending tonight’s game.

We’d briefly spoken about it earlier when we were on the phone.

Grabbing my cell phone off the counter, I dialed his number.

“I take it you’ve received the flowers,” he stated into the receiver.

“I did…” I blushed and tucked my hair behind my ear. “They’re gorgeous.”

“I figured I would put a smile on your face before the big game.”

“And I’m so appreciative.” Spinning around, I leaned against the counter. “I’m only doing this because my oldest asked.”

“I know. I also know that you’re uncomfortable.” He took a beat before continuing, “Remember, you don’t owe them a thing. You don’t have to answer any questions about nothing. Let them speculate all they want.”

“I know…” I sighed. “The women can be a bit pretentious, if you know what I mean.”

“I do. I also know that what has happened between you and your ex is none of their business.”

“It’s no one’s business,” I repeated as if it were a mantra. “It happened, and it’s over. I’m moving on with my life, and they need to do the same.”

“Exactly! That’s all there is to it.”

“Yep, yep, yep,” I repeated a few times. “What are you up to?”

“Just left the studio. About to get an early dinner in before I call it a night.”

“That’s good. How was your day?”

“It was good. And yours? I know you was working on settling that case. You got everything worked out?”

“I did. Ninety-thousand-dollar settlement.”

“Look at you!” He boasted. “Closing big deals.”

“Stop it…” I waved him off. “My client is happy.”

“I bet so. We’ve gotta celebrate. What about dinner tomorrow night? We can go to that vintage Italian spot you sent me to.”

“Ssss…” I stalled. Last week, Lamar was hosting a few friends and was looking for a place to dine.

I suggested he take them to A Mano, a vintage restaurant in downtown Atlanta.

It was one of Kreed’s favorite spots to duck off at, and the many times I’ve been, the food never disappointed.

The idea of having a date there made me cringe inside now.

Instead of agreeing, I offered, “How about we try Nino’s on Cheshire Bridge instead?

I’ve been planning on dining there, but time hasn’t been on my side. ”

“We can do that. Send me the information, and I’ll see about a reservation.”

“Hold on. Doing it now before I forget.” Pulling the phone down, I searched for the restaurant.

“Mom, are we leaving soon? We’re going to be late,” Maddie Claire asked, as she stepped into the kitchen sporting her black Demons jersey and a white pleated skirt.

I’d taken the braids out of the girls’ hair, and since I hadn’t gotten around to washing it, I combed it up into a crinkled ponytail.

She’d tied a black and red ribbon around hers, making her look extra girly tonight.

“Just a second, Bug,” I said before speaking back into the phone. “Lamar, you should have it now.”

“Just got the notification,” he confirmed. “I’ll shoot the information over to you as soon as I set a time.”

“Mom...” Maddie Claire stomped her foot and frowned up at me, looking just like her father. “We’re going to be late.”

“Don’t be rude, Bug. You see me on the phone.” I chastised.

“It’s okay, Masai,” Lamar said on the other end of the phone. “I’ll let you go. I know how important tonight is for the kids.”

“Right.” I huffed and licked the corner of my mouth. “If I’m not out too late, I’ll call you when I make it home.”

“Call me whenever. If I’m asleep, I’ll get up for you.”

“Sure.” I giggled. “Thank you again for the flowers.”

“You’re most welcome. Talk to you soon,” he added before ending the call.

Sucking in a deep breath, I blew it out through my nose. “I hope you got everything while you’re in here rushing me.”

“Yep!” Maddie Claire popped before twisting off.

“That child…” I drawled and shook my head.

Gathering the pile of bills, I shoved them into my purse and went to go rally the rest of the troops. I still had special privileges at the stadium and planned on using them. Therefore, we needed to get a move on it before the car service showed up.

“You’re awfully quiet,” Koya noted after taking a seat beside me.

“Girl…” I exhaled. “Just taking it all in.”

“Uncomfortable?”

“As hell. And I’m having a hard time figuring out why. Nothing has happened.”

“Maybe because this isn’t your life anymore,” she offered.

“But it is.” I pointed at my four girls who were currently up out of their seats, yelling at the field.

The game was in the third quarter, and the Demons were up by a field goal.

The girls had been thoroughly enjoying themselves while I sat stoically in my seat, just looking around.

This had been my life for so many years, and now it felt foreign to me.

Out of habit, I cheered anytime Kreed scored a touchdown and anytime he gained yards.

Although it felt awkward, not cheering would’ve been more awkward.

Cheering him on, as I’d done so many times in the past, was the most natural thing.

“It’s still part of their lives, but you’ve been determined to remove it from yours,” she specified.

Stroking my tongue across my bottom lip, I nodded. “Right.”

“It’s normal to feel that way, Masai. I feel like you keep trying to rush yourself through your healing process, not realizing that you are essentially grieving a life that you’ve lived for almost twenty years.”

“Grief.” I snorted. “Grief is a muthafucka, I tell you that.”

“It is. But it’s also a process.” She grabbed my hand and gave it a quick squeeze.. “This isn’t my first time advising you to grieve as long as you need.”

“That’s the thing, though, Koya. Allowing myself to grieve means sitting in the shit—dwelling in it—I don’t have the time for that.”

“So then continue moving around like you’re not bothered. You’re never going to move on if you don’t give yourself the time and grace that you need. If coming to a football game has you in your feelings, then babe… you’re not done grieving.”

“You might be right, but I don’t want to hear that shit.”

“Touché, bitch.” She sniggled. “How’s Lamar?”

I blushed immediately. “He sent me flowers.”

“We love a good arrangement!” She quipped.

“That’s the same thing I told him.” I giggled. “We’re going to dinner tomorrow night.”

“Oooh! That’ll be nice.”

“It’s not our first time hanging out, ya know?”

She nodded. “Oh, I’m aware.”

“Right. So… I think I want to?—”

She leaned in. “You want to what ?”

“You know…”

“I don’t,” she lied, smirking at me. She knew exactly what I was trying to say, but the bitch was going to make me say it.

Rolling my eyes, I groaned. “We’ve kissed a few times, but I’m in dire need of some intimacy.”

“In other words… you trying to be grown. Masai!” she effused lowly. “Are you saying you’re ready to go to the next base?”

“I am,” I admitted with a quick bow of my head. “Kreed is the only man I’ve been with since undergrad. I’m petrified, but I’m ready.”

“If you’re petrified, how do you know that you’re ready?”

“Koya… Kreed and I had a very, very, very healthy sex life. My appetite for sex is as high as Magic Johnson’s in his prime. I’m used to getting it in a few times a day. Like… there’s never been a time, as far back as I can remember, where me and this man wasn’t getting it on.”

“And you miss that?”

“Shit… She misses that.” I pointed down toward my lady parts.

“Oh, wow.” Koya snickered. “I say go for it. I mean, you guys are still getting to know each other, but if the sex is bad, that’s all the ammunition you need to cut him off before it gets too deep.”

“It’s big…” I disclosed. “On our last date, I felt it when he hugged me, and my God.” My eyes rolled back dramatically.

“Big doesn’t mean he can fuck. There are plenty of men out there packing and lacking.”