Page 16 of Out of Bounds (Atlanta Demon Series #4)
“I understand, and as much as I don’t want to, I get it. But, baby, it’s always been just you. Never anybody else, Masai. I love you,” I avowed.
“I love you, too, baby. Just not enough to stick around and play Stepmom to someone else’s kid.
I don’t possess that type of strength.” Pushing back from the table, she stood.
“Can you show me to a room? I need to get some sleep. I want to leave before the kids wake up. I don’t want them to see me here and get a false sense of hope. ”
“Sure. You can take my room. I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“Thank you,” she whispered and tipped her head.
Leading her out of the kitchen, I walked her upstairs to my bedroom.
I’d left Kree in bed alone, so once she saw him, she kicked her shoes off and slid under the covers beside him.
After checking on the rest of the kids, I made my way back downstairs and stretched out on the sofa.
Now that I’d gotten an opportunity to explain my side of things to Masai, I prayed that there would be some type of resolution between the two of us.
Maybe sharing my truth would make her not hate me as much as she did. Shit... maybe it’ll help us to start repairing our relationship. If not for us, then at least for the years that we’ve been together and the children. As much as us being separated hurt me, it was hurting my kids ten times more.
“Move…” I groaned and swatted at the hands attempting to pry my eyelids open. After that teary conversation with my wife last night, I’d finally been able to shut my mind off long enough to catch some sleep before my kids got up for the day.
That moment of decent sleep was now over.
When I peeled my eyes open, I laughed at Kree.
He was standing on the side of the couch with his cup in one hand and the other on my face.
“Where yo’ mama at? I could’ve sworn I’d left her in bed with you.
” Grabbing him up from the floor, I sat him on my chest and raised my arms above my head into a stretch.
The front door opened, causing me to turn my head in that direction. It was then that I noticed Masai creeping back into the house. She gasped like I’d caught her off guard when she noticed me watching her.
“You’re up.”
“Yeah… woke up to this one, trying to pry my eyes open.”
“Kree, I told you to sit here.” She laughed softly. “I, uh… I heard everything you said last night, and while I do appreciate your honesty, I… uh…” Pausing, she sucked in a deep breath before gazing off.
Sitting up on the couch, I stared at her. “You what, Masai?”
She licked the corner of her lips before tossing her eyes back to me.
“I’ve filed for a divorce. The papers are on the counter in the kitchen.
” Shoving her hands in her pockets, she stared at the ceiling for a few seconds.
“I’m not asking for anything but for you to continue paying the bills at the house.
I know once the divorce is final, I will have to find insurance coverage, and I’m okay with that as long as you keep the kids on yours. ”
“Masai…”
“No, Kreed.” She held her hand up in protest. “This is something that I have to do for me. Staying will make me feel like I’m weak, like I love you more than I love myself, and I don’t want to feel like that.
I don’t want to feel as if I stayed in this because of the years or because of the kids.
I love you dearly, but I’ve gotta love me more.
I hate that this is where it’s ended, but…
” She hesitated. “Please don’t fight me on this, Kreed.
I’m fragile enough, and I can’t take having to go back and forth with you about anything. ”
“I won’t fight you,” I mumbled somberly.
She released a breath. “Good. Have your attorney look over the papers. If you want to add anything, then we can mediate. I just want to move on.”
I heard everything she was saying, but my mind was still spinning on the fact that she’d actually filed. There’ve been talks about it, but I was under the assumption that she was holding off. To hear that she’d actually taken the liberty to put the shit in writing was fucking me up to the max.
Masai seemed dead set on leaving this marriage, and while I understood that I fucked up, I wanted like hell to beg her to stay.
I’d purposely tried to stay out of her way to let her do shit on her own accord.
I was hoping that space would somehow put us on the path of reconciliation.
Perhaps I should’ve pressed her more. I could’ve invaded her space, not giving her the chance to even think divorce was possible.
Anything would’ve been better than having to sit through a fucking divorce.
Truth be told,
Masai didn’t have to make any demands. We didn’t have a prenup, so whatever she wanted, the courts would grant her. I was never pressed to make her sign anything because we’d come up together. She gave up her dreams and aspirations to be my number one fan.
Now, I was regretting that shit, and not because I didn’t think she deserved anything, but because I knew our shit was cut and dry.
Whatever she asked for, I would have to give with no pushback.
At least if we had a prenup, I could argue with her, you know…
prolong the shit until I could convince her to give my ass another chance. I fucked up with that one.
“So…” She drawled after a few minutes of silence. “I’m going to get going. Let me know when you’re on the way to drop them off.”
“Okay.” Wrapping my arms around Kree, I stood from the couch. “I gotta report to training camp in a few days. I wanted us to spend some time together before showing up.”
“Spend it with the kids. I don’t mind.”
“Right.” Swiping my tongue across my bottom lip, I adjusted Kree in my arms. “You mind bringing them by like you normally do. I don’t want much of their routine to change.”
She sighed. “Kreed, I don’t know…”
“Just so I can spend some time with ’em, Sai. They’re used to attending.”
“I know what they’re used to.” She hissed kind of harshly, holding the bridge of her nose as if I was annoying her. “Look… I’ll try to arrange something.”
“That’s all I’m asking for.”
“When I come up with something, I will let you know.” She gave me a small smile before kissing Kree on the cheek. “Have the girls call me when they get up.”
“I will.”
Similar to the previous departures, I sat there and watched the love of my life walk away. Right when she reached the door, she stopped. “I’ve been meaning to tell you that I won’t be attending the foundation’s dinner this year. I don’t want anyone to think that you and I are still together.”
“Hold on now, Sai. That foundation is yours —my name is just on it.”
“It was never about me. I set that up for you and your legacy. I’ll find somebody to stand in for me, but I don’t think I should be there.”
I wanted to protest—hell, beg her ass to show up.
The Kreed Dolla foundation was Masai’s love child.
Every year, we hosted a dinner as our way of saying thank you to everyone who’d donated to our cause time after time.
It was one of the biggest events we threw right before the season started, so to hear that she had no plans on showing up felt like another gut punch.
I knew my wife; therefore, I knew once she’d made her mind up, there wasn’t shit I could do to change it. This was the kind of thing I had to look forward to now that we were going in separate directions. The turmoil in my life was just beginning, and I had no one to blame but myself.