Page 10 of One Forbidden Kiss with the Laird (The Cinderella Shepherd Sisters #2)

Catherine hesitated for a moment longer and then turned and left the room.

An awkward little silence followed, broken only when Lord Leven spoke.

‘I wonder, it has been a long time since I was inside this house. Would it be too much of an imposition to have a look around? I would be interested to see what changes you have made.’

Sir William spread his hands and gave a magnanimous ushering gesture. ‘By all means. We would be very happy for you to look around. Perhaps you could accompany Lord Leven, Selina?’

‘Of course,’ Selina murmured, surprised by the turn of events as well as the warmth in her father’s voice.

Ever since she had first thought to seek him out after her mother’s death and the revelation that her father was not a faceless army officer, long dead, as her mother had told her, she had dreamed of a loving relationship filled with care and sentimentality.

That dream was what had made her stick around for so long when she knew she should have abandoned the idea of a doting family long ago.

She hated that at the first sign of affection she was ready to forget all the past hurts, even when she knew her father was only being reasonable because she was finally useful to him.

‘Do you think…?’ Lady Kingsley began. She looked worried and would never normally openly question her husband’s word.

Sir William waved an indulgent hand. ‘We are inside our home and soon Lord Leven will be family. There is no need to worry about propriety, I trust Lord Leven completely.’

‘We shall only be a few minutes,’ Lord Leven confirmed, offering his arm to Selina.

They walked out of the dining room into the spacious hall. Despite it being where Selina was currently staying and Lord Leven was only a guest, he firmly led the way, taking her this way and that through the maze of downstairs rooms.

‘This is a strange thing to do,’ Selina said eventually.

Lord Leven shrugged. ‘This whole evening has been strange.’

‘You noticed?’

‘Are they always that odd?’

Selina took her time before replying, reminding herself that she was meant to be enticing Lord Leven to marry into the family, not scaring him away.

‘They have their quirks, like all families do.’

‘Mine certainly does.’

‘You said you don’t have much family left locally.’

He shrugged. ‘A lot of people have left. It became very difficult to make a living up here and there were better opportunities elsewhere, but there are still a few relatives around.’

‘No one close though?’

‘My mother lives close by.’

Selina cocked her head. ‘You didn’t mention her earlier.’

Lord Leven leaned in closer and lowered his voice, his breath tickling her ear. ‘Can I tell you a secret? I don’t trust Sir William one little bit.’

‘Ah. Surely that will make the negotiations to marry Catherine a little difficult.’

‘I doubt he trusts me either.’ Lord Leven shrugged. ‘We will get there in the end, but until we do the less he knows about me the better. I do not want him to have anything to use as leverage.’ It explained why all his answers at dinner had been vague.

‘You are set on marrying Catherine, then.’

‘Yes,’ he said without hesitation. ‘As long as Sir William delivers on the promises he has made.’

Selina exhaled, allowing herself to let go of some of the guilt she felt for agreeing to her father’s proposition of helping make this marriage happen. Lord Leven was already convinced so her being vaguely complimentary about Catherine was not going to make any difference whatsoever.

‘This is where you grew up?’ Selina said as he paused outside a comfortable sitting room. It was a cosy room, filled with sunshine in the early morning with a good view of the parkland to the left of the house.

‘Yes. I spent my childhood here.’

‘You have happy memories?’

‘Some. Some less happy.’

‘This is the house you want to raise your own family in? To reclaim Taigh Blath for the Thomsons?’

He started to speak and then stopped after a moment, eyeing her curiously.

‘I do not know where your loyalties lie, Miss Shepherd. You are a very easy person to talk to, but I have to remind myself you are affiliated to the Kingsleys.’

‘I would not relay things you had told me in confidence to Sir William,’ Selina said, hurt by the accusation.

She pressed her lips together, telling herself that despite the feeling she had that she had known Lord Leven a long time, in reality they had only spoken for a few minutes on a couple of occasions.

She felt at ease with him, but that did not mean anything, not really.

Whatever fantasies she had spun in her head the night before were not real. Lord Leven’s loyalties were not to her.

‘It is not the house,’ he said, his eyes fixed on hers, bright with intensity. ‘It is the land.’

‘There is something special about the land?’

‘For generations my ancestors have lived here, taking care of the land, ensuring we do not take away more than we give back. When my father died and I had to sell Taigh Blath, I lost the land that my friends and family lived on, relied on for their food, where their homes were built.’

‘The land is still there, though.’

‘But the people are not. Sir William sees the estate as a way of making money.’ He held up his hands before she could interrupt.

‘It is not a criticism. He has no ties here, it is not his family living in the cottages or fishing in the loch. He thinks like a businessman, working the land for profit.’

‘You are not interested in profit?’

‘Only to put back into the estate. Of course, there needs to be income, profit made from farming and rents, but I have no interest in hoarding money in a bank. The proceeds from the income can be re-invested in the estate, pay for repairs, ensure there is enough set aside for the harder years—the bad harvests or when the livestock are decimated by some disease.’

‘You would keep nothing for yourself.’

He smiled at her then and Selina’s heart felt as though it skipped a beat.

‘I am no saint, Miss Shepherd. Nor am I a cruel man. I will not make my wife live as a pauper, but I have learned these last ten years that it is possible to live a fulfilling life without the trappings of wealth.’

‘I think you are marrying into the wrong family,’ Selina said, the words out before she could stop them. A hand flew to her mouth and she had to suppress a groan. Sometimes the words slipped out before she could censor them.

Lord Leven grinned at her. ‘Do not fear, Miss Shepherd, I will not repeat your words. I am well aware my future bride and I will likely have very different priorities. I do not wish her to be miserable, stuck out here in the Scottish countryside, but I have to think of everyone else who is relying on me.’

‘I am sure Catherine will soon adapt to her new way of life,’ Selina said, hoping to salvage something from her mistake. ‘She is eager to learn.’

‘We can hope,’ he murmured, turning away from Selina and to her surprise stepping towards the staircase that led up from the ground floor in the east wing.

It was less grand than the main staircase, but still swept up for three floors, allowing access to the entire east wing.

It was a peculiarity of the house that you could not access any of the upstairs floors of the east wing from the main section, but had to go down one set of stairs and up another.

Glancing over her shoulder Selina followed Lord Leven up, surprised when he stepped into an airy room which was devoid of much furniture.

‘Is this room something special?’ she asked, wondering why they had bypassed so many others and come here instead.

‘When I was young I always thought I would keep my study here.’

‘Not the big room next to the drawing room downstairs?’

‘That was my father’s study. I wanted something different.’

‘Why this room?’

‘Come here.’ He ushered her over to the window, waiting until she stepped in close to continue.

As Selina moved closer she felt the breath catch in her chest. There were still a few inches between them, anyone looking in from outside would not think there was any impropriety, yet Selina was aware of the shift in the atmosphere.

‘You can see all the way along the shore of Loch Leven from here. It’s the only room in the house with such an uninterrupted view.’

It was beautiful…mesmerisingly so. Selina leaned forward, resting her arms on the windowsill, her breath steaming the glass. She took her time looking, trying to understand what it was about this place that inspired such devotion from Lord Leven.

Outside the sunlight glinted off the surface of the loch and the trees swayed gently in the breeze. The land was a rich green, the soil fertile and on a distant hill Selina could see a flock of sheep dotted across the grass.

After a minute she straightened and took a step back, her body colliding with the solid form of Lord Leven.

Selina exhaled sharply and spun to face him, her hands raising instinctively, her fingers brushing against his chest. The sounds of the household faded and for a moment it felt as though Selina and Lord Leven were the only two people in the world.

She knew she should step away, that to linger for even a second more was dangerous, but she was rooted to the spot, her body refusing to obey even the simplest of commands.

She was consumed with thoughts of kissing him and against her better judgement she swayed forward, raising up on to the balls of her feet, her lips now just a few tantalising inches from his.

She recognised the same desire she felt mirrored in Lord Leven’s eyes and her body thrummed with anticipation as his fingers came up to touch her cheek.

Her hands still rested on his chest and even through the layers of material she could feel the strong, steady beat of his heart.

‘Miss Shepherd,’ he murmured.

Just the sound of her name on his lips sent a shiver through her body. In that moment Selina would have abandoned everything she had ever been taught about the value of a young woman’s virtue. She wanted to feel his lips on hers, his body pressed against her naked skin.

Selina closed her eyes and tilted her chin up ever so slightly, her lips parting.

She waited for Lord Leven’s lips to brush against hers, but they never came.

Lord Leven groaned, his fingers dropping from her face, and Selena felt a miniscule fall in temperature as he stepped away.

Her eyes shot open and her cheeks flushed.

It was an outright rejection and it stung sharply as if she had been slapped.

Lord Leven cleared his throat, taking a moment to compose himself before turning back to her. Selina was fighting back tears and she desperately tried to hide how upset she felt.

‘Miss Shepherd, I…’

A glare from Selina silenced him.

‘It’s getting late,’ she said, ‘I should return to Sir William and Lady Kingsley.’

Without waiting to hear Lord Leven’s response she spun and fled the room, cursing under her breath as in her haste her hip bounced off the door frame.