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eighteen

Harlow

“ Fuck …,“ I breathe out as my bullet vibrator works its magic against my clit. My waterproof companion has taken up permanent residence in my shower as of late. Knox has my hormones going wild like I’m a goddamn teenager again.

Knox spends his mornings shirtless, so when I see him before practice, I’m always left with an image to think of when I’m doing what I’m doing right now. That first full day we spent together—the day we walked around The Battery a month ago—sparked something in me. He was always good-looking, but now he’s so fucking alluring . So, in order to not cross a line into a territory we had best not visit, I take care of myself in the shower, imagining it’s him.

God, I sound pathetic. Especially when there’s no way in hell he’s thinking of me the way I’ve been thinking of him. He’s opened up so much more over the past month, and we’ve actually gotten very close now, but I’m not the type of girl he’d ever be interested in. He could have his pick of any actual bat bunnies or even celebrities. He’d never want someone like me. And that’s okay. I’m fine with that.

That’s what I’m telling myself, at least.

I lean back against the cold tile of my shower as my breathing intensifies, waiting for my release. And the orgasm that rips through me shortly after leaves me almost completely sated. I say almost because outside of actual sex with Knox, I don’t think I’ll ever be fully satisfied. But since that’s a line I don’t want to cross, this has to be enough.

I don’t have time to worry about that right now, though. Lane has agreed to do an interview with me for Starred and Fast before tonight’s game. Rory’s interview was well-received, and I’ve done several more staff members. Still, Lane will be the first player I’m interviewing, and I know my followers will love it.

After I hop out of the shower and dry my hair, I throw on my Spencer Stars jersey with a white tank underneath, leaving the jersey open, a pair of jeans, and my favorite Chucks. I opt for some light makeup today, and then I’m on my way to Lane’s.

After a twenty-five-minute subway ride into Soho, I find myself at Lane’s building. Like Knox, Lane lives in a penthouse, so after the door attendant lets me inside, I start the slow ascent to the top floor. A few minutes later, the doors open into his penthouse, and I’m greeted by Lane, who is evidently waiting for my arrival.

“Hey, Lo,” Lane says, gesturing me inside. “Welcome back to La Casa de Brooks. Rory has Sage in her room, so we’ll have some quiet for a bit.”

“Perfect. Thanks for doing this, Lane. I know my readers are really going to enjoy it.”

“Anything for Knox’s girlfriend,” he says with amusement as we both find our places on his couch.

“Fake girlfriend,” I correct.

“We’ll see about that,” Lane replies with a smirk. I just roll my eyes.

“Between you and everyone else, Knox and I will be miserable for the rest of the season.”

“Hey, we just like what we see. Knox is actually fucking happy. I’ve never seen him like that, Lo. He’s happy and smiling. None of that happened until you two started this charade.”

“I’m glad he is. He’s honestly not all that bad. He’s just closed off.”

“And you’ve been opening him up.”

“Bit by bit,” I reply with a smile. “Now, enough about that. Let’s get this interview going.”

“Yeah, there’s no denying that Sage was a surprise for me, but my God, I adore that little girl. She’s the best part of my life now,” Lane says with the biggest smile on his face.

“I think I can speak for everyone when I say we all adore Sage. She’s the absolute sweetest. Did you have difficulty adjusting to being a single dad and a professional baseball player?”

“For sure,” Lane replies honestly. “I had no idea how to take care of a baby. My biggest saving grace was that she was born in January, not in the middle of the season. I had a chance to learn how to be a dad before I had to get back out on the field. And Rory becoming Sage’s nanny has been an absolute godsend. I’m not sure how I could do this without her.”

“What would you say is your favorite part of having Rory as Sage’s nanny?”

“That she travels with us, hands down. Having Sage in every city with me and every game with me is a dream. Single dads don’t get the opportunities I’ve been given, so I try to just soak it all in and not take it for granted. I know how lucky I am. And then all of my friends around me have become Sage’s surrogate family. I appreciate everything I’ve been given and all the love I’ve received. I’m very blessed.”

“Damn, Lane. You’re gonna make me cry,” I say as I reach up to brush away a stray tear.

“You’re a crier, Lo. That’s not hard to do.”

“Shut up,” I say, playfully shoving his shoulder. “You’re getting all sappy on me. I can’t help it. Now, let’s finish this interview, shall we? I’ve just got some fun questions left now. What’s your favorite color?”

“Green. I’ve always liked green.”

“Favorite food?”

“Oh, anything Mexican. The spicier, the better.”

“And last but not least,” I say. “Favorite Taylor Swift song.”

“ The Very First Night . That one is just so fun.”

“Oh my God,” I exclaim. “Are you a secret Swiftie, Lane?”

“I don’t think it’s much of a secret,” Lane replies, rubbing his jaw. “I’d have given my right arm to get tickets when she was in NY last year. But we were in San Diego, unfortunately.”

“You’re the perfect Girl Dad,” I laugh. “Sage is very lucky.”

“I’m luckier to have her,” he admits. “She rocked my world in the best way possible. But you know who else is lucky?” Lane gives me a mischievous look. “Knox.”

I groan. “We’re friends, Lane. Friends in a fake relationship.”

“I know that’s what you both keep saying, but Knox is different, Lo. He’s not the guy I’ve known since he came up to the majors. And that’s a really good thing.”

“I think I’ve just helped him see that good things are out there if you look for them. A positive attitude will take you far.”

“I don’t think that’s what it is.”

“What do you mean?” I question.

“It’s not the attitude, Lo. It’s you. ”

“What do you mean it’s me?”

“I mean he lights up around you. You radiate so much positivity, and Knox is thriving in it. Even if everything is platonic like you both claim, it’s still you doing that to him. I think you’ve truly changed his life. I just hope it sticks when you guys end this… if you do, of course.”

“Lane…” I groan. “It’s going to be over at the end of the season. We’ve already established an end date.”

“Not if you fall in love first,” Rory says, walking into the room with Sage on her hip. “Sorry to intrude, but Sage wants Daddy.”

“Ah, hey there, Lovebug. I missed you.” Sage smiles brightly as Lane positions her on his lap. Rory sits down on my other side so I’m sandwiched between them.

“So, we’re talking about Knox, are we?” Rory interjects.

“Oh, we are,” Lane replies as Sage nuzzles into him, resting her head on his shoulder. “We’re talking about how much better he’s been lately.”

“That’s an understatement,” Rory says. “I’ve known Knox since he was brought up to the team, and he’s always been grumpy. Seeing him smile was a rarity.” She turns her attention right to me. “But not anymore. Now it’s a daily occurrence.”

“Well, I’m happy about that. Like I was telling Lane, he’s not all that bad. He was just closed off. But he’s starting to open up, and his light is shining brighter.”

“Because of you,” she says.

“Maybe,” I reply. “I don’t think I can take all the credit for it. If anything, I’ve just helped him see what he didn’t before.”

“I can agree to that,” Lane says. “As long as you mean that what he didn’t see before was you.”

“You are both absolutely relentless, you know that?”

“We mean well,” Lane replies with a smile.

“But don’t worry,” Rory states. “You guys will see it on your own one day.”

As adamant as our friends are, they will be sorely disappointed if this doesn’t happen.

When this doesn’t happen.

Definitely when. Knox and I are friends now, and that’s all we’ll be. And once this fake relationship ends, we’ll continue being friends because that’s all we want, regardless of what our other friends think.