Page 4 of No Right To Love You (Winter of Love #6)

Ocean

Hearing January sigh makes me want to go to her and hug her tight, but I won’t.

I can’t… if I do that then I’m just further enabling her behavior.

I can deal with a lot of things coming my way when it concerns her but one thing, we promised each other when we decided to have kids was that they would always be our number one priority.

My cell phone pings, and I reach out for it.

January-February: I’m sorry.

Me: baby…

January-February: I know. I’ll make sure I’m there tomorrow.

January-February: Zoe isn’t going to go on that trip without me.

Me: alright.

January-February: I miss you.

Me: pretty sure that’s my line ??

January-February: lol. did you want to say it first?

Me: nah, baby. I’m glad you said it.

Me: now, get some rest.

January-February: are you coming to bed?

Me: I’ll be up in a bit.

Me: sleep. You’re tired.

January-February: I love you. I need you to know that.

Me: I know. Trust me like you always have.

January-February: you love me?

Me: you never have to ask me, marionette . You know that.

January doesn’t respond and I know why. She’s probably getting ready for bed soaking in the bear claw bath in our bathroom.

I shut my eyes as I tap my fingers against my chest. Inhaling, I know I can smell her that sweet mixture of jasmine and rose.

January loves a bath before bed especially when she’s tired.

It must’ve been a tasking day and I want to go to her, but she doesn’t need that right now.

I shut my eyes and try not to focus on my need to go take care of my sub. Everything that I crave to do… to care for, to conquer, love and adore what I’m being pushed back from doing. It’s driving me nuts, but I can’t just voice it all the time.

One thing that January and I agreed on when we got together was that no matter what, we would choose to love each other daily. I love my sub and respect her distance dearly but me and my wife are at odds.

Our roles are important to us or rather were important to us but now it’s like she wants me to lock her up in that cage she used to love so much just to get a minute of her time.

Just a little bit of time… in that cage with those pretty, little chains adorning her neck, her wrists, and her ankles; all of them could be clasped together if we truly wanted to play.

I should just go up there and make her submit to me again.

Make her weep for my love again and scream out her apology but fuck… we have kids. We have more now.

A smirk forms on my face when I think about the many ways, I could make her weep. I don’t care for the tears, I’d make her weep via her pussy so that I could sniff the air and inhale her scent; that pure, unadulterated sweet smell of pussy. My marionette ’s pussy.

I shudder at the thought of wanting and needing her. How much that alternates throughout my day. It was blind lust when I first met her, but it turned into tunnel vision. I can’t see past my love, past her but I do concentrate on the products of our love.

Our team. The people who first loved us without any damage or wreckage needed.

“Daddy Bear?” I hear a soft whisper coming from the end of the hall that leads to the double staircase.

It’s Zoe. She must’ve heard her mother come in but waited.

“Yes, darling?” I answer.

“There’s a big monster in my room.” She whispers and I smile, only Zoe would use that to get me upstairs.

“Okay, I’ll be right up, Zoe.” I say to her, and I know she won’t move until I get up.

Opening my eyes, I stand but then I hear another pair of feet padding in the hall, but they stop in the foyer. It’s January.

“I’ve got her, Ocean,” January says. “Want mommy to check where all the big bad monsters are and wipe them out for you?” She asks Zoe.

“How are you gonna do that, mommy?” Zoe asks her.

“Didn’t anybody tell you!” She gasps. “I’m not just any kind of lawyer, I’m a lawyer that sends big monsters to jail.”

Zoe gasps. “Daddy didn’t tell me that! Not nice, daddy bear, not cool.” Zoe chastises me as her voice carries as her mother takes her back up the stairs.

I chuckle as I lay there.

“Goodnight, small girl.” I say.

“Love you, daddy.” Zoe says. “Mommy, why isn’t daddy sleeping in the bed? Is he sneaking to watch more tv?” She asks.

Before January could reply to her, I chime in. “I’ll be up in a minute, baby. I’ll just finish watching this episode.”

January doesn’t say anything for a minute but then she recovers. “Oh, okay Honey.”

We really can’t continue down this path. Our kids deserve better.