Page 75 of My Big Fat Vampire Wedding

“Yeah,” Lucy said through gritted teeth. “Sometimes, I love him so much that I just want to suffocate him.”

“Been there,” Henrietta said with a knowing nod, making Pandora stifle a groan.

“But what a way to go, my darling,” Elias said with a mischievous glint in his eye at the innuendo Pandora prayed no one else caught on to.

Lucy’s cheeks, however, went brilliantly red, making Elias chuckle as he pulled her closer and planted an affectionate kiss on her head.

“Oh, absolutely,” Reginald said from across the room, making everyone turn to look at him as he reached for a fire poker and started to demonstrate some sort of fight stance, prompting Robert to grab the fire shovel and follow Reginald’s instructions. “Very nice. Yes, that’s how we did it!”

Pandora debated getting involved, but figured it seemed harmless enough. Just two “history buffs” demonstrating their shared knowledge. There was no reason to assume Robert would come to the conclusion that Reginald had firsthand experience of such things.

So she stayed where she was, trying to keep the conversation light between her mother and Victor’s mum.

Until, suddenly, Ravenna appeared, to announce dinner. “If you can all step into the dining room,” she said, waving everyone in the right direction, practically bouncing in excitement.

“I don’t know if I can eat eel again,” Victor whispered to Pandora, making her let out a small laugh.

“It smells … different from last time,” she said, though she was having a hard time placing anything.

“Here, my sweet pup,” Elias said, pulling a chair out for Lucy, who looked daggers at him as she slid onto it.

Pandora made Victor sit next to her, regardless of what her mother might have preferred.

Robert sat next to Reginald, with a less-comfortable-­looking Mary at his other side.

“There’s no pig this time,” Victor said.

“No dogs at the table,” Ravenna told Henrietta as she came into the dining room, all of her dogs at her heels.

“They’ll be under the table,” Henrietta said, taking a seat next to Mary.

“Tonight, we have baked feta pasta,” Ravenna said, pulling the lid off one of the dishes. “Spicy vodka pasta,” she went on, pulling off another lid. “Sweet pepper sandwiches stuffed with cream cheese and bagel seasoning …”

“Is it just me or are these dishes all the ones trending on social apps?” Victor asked.

He was right about that.

Ravenna, realizing her mistake with the food from too long ago the last time, had done her research and decided to make every trendy food dish that had recently gone viral.

Pandora was touched, again, at Ravenna’s effort to try to do right, to welcome not only Victor, but his parents too, into their family. No matter how tense some others were about the arrangement.

The meal itself went off with a surprising lack of catastrophes. Sure, Pandora’s cousin Jasper was caught staring at Victor’s mum’s neck more than a few times. And, yeah, at some point, Elizabeth, frustrated with notbeing able to locate the clever Vlad, instead decided to run around under the table, chasing Henrietta’s sixteen dogs. And, sure, Reginald got into far too many details about some minor war that Pandora was pretty sure wasn’t even in any history texts.

But other than that, everyone seemed to enjoy the food. Dante, Elias, and Lucy managed to keep Mary distracted from any oddness.

It all went well. Better than she ever could have expected.

But then there was another knock at the door.

Looking back, Pandora was pretty sure she could pinpoint that as the moment the night took a sharp turn and then veered completely off the tracks.

20

Pandora’s gaze went to her mother, but she looked just as perplexed as Pandora felt, as Lucian rose from the table to ascertain who was at the door.

“How much more family do you have?” Victor asked, looking down the table. Which, despite the many people gathered around, was only half full.

“Well, let’s put it this way. When everyone is here, there’s not only no room at the table, but we usually have people standing around.”