Page 137 of My Big Fat Vampire Wedding

So, it wouldn’t be as crazy to assume Drachmar had discovered it as well. Even if he turned his nose up at it on principle.

They found no fewer than twenty bedrooms in the various wings of the castle. Thirty-five fireplaces. And at least a million pieces of vampire memorabilia, their plastic material or neon colours in stark contrast to the tasteful brass, gold, and black, red and grey tones of the home’s original decor.

Pandora had to admit that Drachmar was right abouthiscastle being in much better shape than the one on the other side of the hill that was supposedly his “real” home, according to both fiction and nonfiction sources.

There were few cracks and no crumbling stones. The paint on the walls was meticulously maintained, and the carpets and drapes were all pristine with not a single moth hole to be found.

“I was not expecting this,” Victor said when they finally found their way into the kitchen.

Pandora hadn’t been either.

Judging by the rest of the castle, Pandora had expected to find a room stuck in time. If not a simple hearth to cook by, then at least a range from lifetimes past. But everything in the kitchen was sleek and modern. There was a massive industrial range that Pandora knew, from shopping for their flat, cost an obscene amount of money, all stainless-steel appliances, rich, cherrywood cabinets that went all the way to the high ceilings, and a bowl overflowing with fresh fruit in the center of the island.

“I think I lived in a flat the size of that refrigerator,” Victor said as he pulled the doors open to reveal a fully stocked interior. Everything from fresh veg, yogurt, eggs, and meat, to kombucha and condiments.

“Sorry. No blood,” he said, giving Pandora a wince.

“Maybe in the pantry? Since you don’t usually serve it cold.”

“Right. Of course.” Victor went to the pantry, walking in and letting out a whistle that had Pandora following.

Floor to ceiling, the shelves were overflowing with every essential from rice and beans to sugar and flour to the strangest types of crisps and snack cakes.

“Choose your vintage,” Victor said, waving toward the shelving just behind the door.

And, sure enough, as high as the eye could see, there were cases of the synthetic blood. Every type available on the market. Even one Pandora hadn’t seen before.

“Looks like we’re all set on food. Want me to uncork you one of these fancy ones?” he asked, pointing.

“Definitely. How long do you think we have before sunrise?” Pandora asked, looking toward the heavily draped windows.

Victor flipped his watch – a wedding gift from Elias – to check the time. “I’d say two hours before we start to see it – why?”

“Well, remember that package I wouldn’t let you look inside?”

“I do.”

“You can finally know what it is at just about sun-up.”

With that, Victor made himself some steak and potatoes while Pandora enjoyed several of the bottles of synthetic blood until she felt like she was buzzing.

Only then did she rush to retrieve the package from the case in their room, grab Victor, and drag him outside.

“You can’t be serious,” Victor said as they stood facing the lake located not far behind Drachmar’s castle.

“How many times have I made you watch the movie?” she asked, handing him the linen shirt.

“Why don’t we just watch it again?” he asked, looking dubiously at the lake.

“Just so I can complain about the scene for the millionth time?” she asked. “Come on. Make the fantasy come true.”

“It’s got to be frigid.”

To that, she reached out, grabbing him by the waistband and pulling him close.

“I promise I’ll warm you up after.”

That was all it took.