Page 69 of My Big Fat Vampire Wedding

He looked like he’d stepped out of some gothic novel.

Or, Pandora thought with rising panic, like a stereotypical vampire.

“What’s wrong?” Victor asked. Then, when she didn’t immediately answer, “Is that a cockatoo on his shoulder?”

Yes, yes, it was.

And there was the problem.

Well, Dudley himself was a bit of an odd duck. But not worse than the rest of her family – just in a different way.

It was the bird that was going to be a problem.

Because if she thought the feud between her aunts Ravenna and Henrietta was bad, it had nothing on the decades-long bone-deep hatred between Vlad and Uncle Dudley’s cockatoo, Elizabeth.

Unlike Vlad, Elizabeth wasn’t immortal. But birds like her easily lived eighty or more years naturally with good care. And Elizabeth had spent every one of her fifty-six years becoming an absolute menace to society. And trying to mate with a very uninterested Vlad.

“Vlad hates that bird,” Pandora told Victor as Elizabeth let out an ear-splitting squawk.

Pandora’s head turned to the side to find Vlad suddenly lift off of his perch, flying into the foyer, his wings ruffling her hair as he mumbled something that sounded a heck of a lot like a particularly nasty curse as he went.

He wasn’t quick enough, though. Elizabeth saw him, took flight herself and went after the poor raven, her yellow crest up high, ready to start some trouble.

“Was that Elizabeth I just saw?” Dante’s voice sounded from behind Pandora. He looked like he’d just emerged from bed, but clearly hadn’t had a restful sleep, judging from the purple smudges under his eyes.

“Yeah,” Pandora said, grimacing.

“That’s going to be fun.” Dante nodded at Victor. “Hey, Victor. Your parents here?”

“Should be any minute,” he said as Henrietta camebustling out of the back of the house, cradling one of her dogs to her chest as she made a beeline for Dudley.

“That rat with wings of yours!” She rushed to catch up with Dudley as he actively tried to avoid her. “Don’t you walk away from me!”

“Just breathe,” Victor said, rubbing a hand up and down Pandora’s spine.

She’d been so distracted that she’d forgotten to pretend to breathe. She tried to humor Victor as she took a few slow, deep breaths. But mostly, she was just enjoying the feel of him casually touching her. Even if her body was having anything but casual thoughts.

She might have even leaned into him and let out a little mewling sound, if the knocker hadn’t sounded through the house at that very moment.

“Just keep breathing,” Victor said as they both moved together, as a couple, toward the door.

“Mum, Dad.” Victor greeted his parents.

Victor was the perfect melding of them both. He was tall and fit like his father, with the same strong jaw and broody brows. But he’d inherited his mother’s thick, dark hair and gorgeous green eyes.

“This is Pandora. Pandora, this is Mary and Robert,” he said, waving toward his parents.

“It’s so nice to meet you,” Mary said, reaching to shake Pandora’s hand. Robert did the same. Everything about them was a little stiff, standoffish. Pandora couldn’t tell if it was simply their nature, if they were feeling shy about the party, or if they just didn’t like her. Though she went ahead and latched on to the last one. For funsies. Because she wasn’t stressed enough.

“Mary, Robert, these are my parents, Ophelia andLucian. Mum, Dad, this is Mary and Robert.” Pandora introduced them when her parents made their way into the foyer.

Pandora couldn’t help but see the contrasts between the couples.

Mary and Robert were dressed nicely, but in an understated way, in simple slacks. Mary had on a jumper; her husband had opted for a sleeveless jumper over a ­button-­up shirt. They stood with a few feet between them, never once touching.

Then there was Ophelia and Lucian. Ophelia was in another of her velvet, floor-length gowns in a wine colour that hugged every curve. Lucian was in an all-black suit, complete with some fine gold jewelry. And the two clung together as close as newlyweds, as if being apart from each other physically hurt them.

Pandora knew she wanted a relationship like her parents had. Deep. Everlasting.