Page 62 of Meet Me Under the Northern Lights
GUNNAR’S COACH
‘Hello, Chloe.’
‘Hello, Michelle. How are you?’
As Chloe looked at her boss on the Zoom call she thought she had never seen her look so unput-together.
Not that that was necessarily a bad thing.
She knew that despite Michelle’s confident projection, her boss was riddled with insecurities and sometimes it was those that made her act a certain way.
But, it wasn’t an excuse for her lack of appreciation and consideration.
As the coach bumped up and down on their journey, thankfully with free and reasonably fast Wi-Fi, Chloe steadied the screen.
‘You don’t need to ask me that,’ Michelle said. ‘You shouldn’t ask me that actually.’
‘Is everything OK with the baby?’ Chloe continued regardless.
Michelle nodded. ‘Everything is fine. Perfect, they said at the last check-up. The head is fully engaged now. Apparently, that was supposed to make me feel joyful, but all I could think about was that one sex education class at school where they had a plastic pelvis and a Baby Annabell.’
‘It won’t be like that,’ Chloe reassured. ‘And you have the best doctors looking after you.’
There was silence on the call and Chloe wondered if their connection had been severed until:
‘I am lucky,’ Michelle stated with so much meaning, Chloe wasn’t sure she had ever heard her say anything in that way ever before.
And she wasn’t quite sure how to respond, so she didn’t.
She just let Michelle’s sentence have room to breathe and glanced out of the coach window at the scenery as they rolled by towards today’s destination Gunnar had asked to be in charge of.
‘I am so, so lucky,’ Michelle continued, this time sounding bright, more upbeat, like this feeling was revolutionary.
‘Yes,’ Chloe agreed.
‘And most of the time I behave like a raging bitch who is angry at the whole world with absolutely no reason for it.’
‘Well…’
‘And you can only say it’s down to hormones for the past almost nine months of it. For the rest of the time… that’s just been me being me and not appreciating anything. Like some privileged princess with no concept of reality.’
It sounded like Michelle had been getting deep into motivational podcasts – not necessarily a bad thing.
‘Don’t be hard on yourself,’ Chloe told her.
‘Why not?’ Michelle asked. ‘Why shouldn’t I be hard on myself?
You know, Chloe, everything you said to me was absolutely right.
100 per cent correct. And I know that for two reasons.
One, because when you were saying the words to me I could feel them hitting those deep places inside we like to try to ignore.
And, two, because you’ve never said anything to me that hasn’t been 100 per cent correct. ’
Chloe smarted in her seat. ‘Well, apart from telling you I spoke Icelandic.’
‘One thing,’ Michelle said. ‘One small thing that somehow I made into a huge deal. And made you feel you couldn’t be honest with me about it.
’ She shook her head. ‘Shocking. As is not only not treating you like my very best employee but not treating you like my equal or treating you like… my friend.’
‘Well, in business I know it’s hard to keep professional boundaries but?—’
‘But I did not support you as an employer, as an equal or as a friend when you were going through one of the hardest things anyone has to go through,’ Michelle stated.
OK, this was definitely new and different behaviour from Michelle and Chloe wasn’t quite sure how to react to it so, again, she let it sit.
‘Chloe… the pitch for Sinclairz Chairs is magnificent.’
‘Magnificent’ was not a word Michelle used lightly. And Chloe felt that professional pride fizzing in her stomach. She wasn’t just good at her job, she was magnificent.
Michelle continued. ‘In the time you’ve had there in Iceland you’ve really put the work in.
It actually made me want to resign as a director from this company and start working at Sinclairz Chairs so I get to experience this magical island you’ve described it as and all their work camaraderie the way you’ve put it together.
You’ve made it sound like an advertorial for working with Lincoln actually. ’
‘Oh, have I?’ Chloe said, frowning. ‘I’m sorry if that’s your take away from it, I?—’
‘Chloe, stop,’ Michelle butted in. ‘Nothing I am saying here is a criticism of any kind, OK? Nothing.’
Chloe swallowed. It was like some kinder, softer, lighter version of Michelle was pulling the strings now. It was unprecedented.
‘You are not only an incredible employee, Chloe,’ Michelle carried on. ‘You are an incredible person.’ She took a deep breath. ‘And I feel so much pride in saying that because I am so blessed that you work for me. But… I’m not sure how long that can continue.’
Chloe jolted as the vehicle bumped over a lump in the road and she had to steady her laptop as well as her heart.
Michelle was going to accept her resignation.
Well, Chloe had written it, meant it. But still, this was the moment her career as she knew it, as she had built it, was going to come to an end.
‘You know what I’m saying, Chloe? Right?’
Chloe nodded. ‘You liked the pitch, but I broke your trust when I lied on my CV and I breached ethical code when a robot voice told the chamber of commerce that Sinclairz were a potential client and all that is fact, despite the nice things you’ve said using “magnificent” and “incredible”.
You are going to accept my resignation.’ She took a breath.
‘So, what happens now? Do I just leave?’
‘What?’ Michelle exclaimed. ‘What are you talking about? I don’t want you to leave! But I understand your reasons for wanting to leave having worked with an unappreciative monster all this time!’
Did she really want to leave? Or did she just want things to change? Those questions could have fitted with so many scenarios in her life, but did she even have an answer?
‘Chloe, where even are you right now?’
Chloe glanced out of the window at the scenery flashing by. It was snowing today, but lightly, like someone was up there in the clouds, sieving icing sugar on top of a glossy, mossy, rocky cake. ‘I’m on my way to Husavik to see some whales.’
‘I don’t remember that being mentioned in the pitch for Sinclairz Chairs.’
It wasn’t. This was something she was doing for her and Gunnar. He had the opportunity to take this tour as the driver and she had remembered he had spoken about it when they were on the boat the first night she had seen the Northern Lights.
‘No,’ Chloe answered, simply. ‘Not the main suggested itinerary. But, at the bottom of page six, you will see there are a few other options and this trip could be one of them.’
‘Look, Chloe, no more beating around the bush. I want to be completely straight with you even if it means, you know, touching on my… oh God, I don’t know if I can say the word…’ She took a breath and panted like she might be about to push the baby out then and there. ‘E… e… emotions.’
‘That was very brave, Michelle,’ Chloe said with utter sincerity. ‘I’m very proud of you.’
‘I need you, Chloe. Now more than ever. Because I cannot do this on my own and the only person I know who is as control freakish as me about this business is you. You are my safe pair of hands, the brains behind everything really and I never fully appreciated just how brilliant you are. But I want to now. Before someone else swipes you because they aren’t as blind or as stupid as me. ’
‘O-K,’ Chloe said, a little tentatively.
‘Chloe, I don’t want you to be my employee any more.
I want you to be my partner. A partner in the business.
Sharing the profits, working towards more growth, making plans to see Dress Code fold and go into administration…
OK, maybe a bit harsh… but, Chloe, I think we would continue to be a dream team and I would promise to do better at collaboration than I have been, hopefully particularly when these hormones exit. ’
Partnership. Chloe’s dream. What she had been on the path towards since she had set her compass dial all the way over to the direction of work with no other points on the map.
This felt like a defining moment; the snow clouds should have parted and a beam of light should have appeared like an angelic beacon spotlighting this transformative episode.
Except, it didn’t feel quite how Chloe had expected it to feel.
‘Thank you, Michelle,’ she said, a sense of unexplained ease about her now. ‘I am really so honoured that you’ve said those things and made that offer to me and?—’
‘Well,’ Michelle jumped in. ‘Of course we can go through all the figure work and percentages and terms and conditions when you get back here for the Sinclairz Chairs meeting.’
Now a shiver ran through Chloe but it was definitely dread and not exhilaration. ‘What Sinclairz Chairs meeting?’
‘Chloe, I’m not going to email this brilliant work to Lincoln or his team. As magnificent as it is on paper, we need to sell this in person. And, when I say “we”, I really mean “you” because you are the beating heart of this project.’
Her eyes were already on Gunnar, that driving side-profile from the seat she was getting accustomed to riding in.
His blond hair pushed back behind his ears, a look of concentration on his handsome face as he navigated the road.
She cared about him. Deeply cared. But what really happened next for them? There were no guarantees…
‘The meeting is in two days,’ Michelle said.
Now Chloe gasped. ‘What?’
‘We need to get this pitched with festive weather outside and a Yuletide backdrop inside. I’ve got Scarlet making the boardroom into an Icelandic winter wonderland so if you can email her any more photos that can inspire her mood boards that would be sensational.’
Chloe didn’t know what to say. Because if she left for the UK now she would miss Magnús’s show.