Page 33 of Meet Me at the Metro (Gildenhill #1)

33

TOO SWEET

E L L I E

T he heels of my wedges are a steady drumbeat in the night as I hurry down the lamp-lit sidewalk. Rain beats down on me from the dark, clouded sky above, growing heavier with every hurried step I make. Through the curtain of rain fogging the walk ahead of me, there’s a tall silhouette my eyes can’t quite make out.

I call out to it, hoping— needing— it to be him.

“ Theo! ”

The figure, several feet ahead, stills at the echo of my voice.

It’s him.

Breathing a sigh of relief, I momentarily stop and quickly yank the wedges off my aching feet, clutching them at my fingertips as I jog to catch up. The chill air rushes against me, sending my dress rippling in the wind. Rain is bleeding into the merlot fabric covering my body as I finally grow close enough to Theo to make out each of his striking features from behind.

Broad shoulders. Beautifully disheveled, dark blonde hair. The sharp, rigid muscles of his arms. Long, powerful legs.

The anticipation of what to do or say next consumes me. I don’t know if he needs comfort or space right now. A primal, instinctual part of me whispers comfort, even though the stubborn side of him will likely lie and try to convince me otherwise.

Naturally, my hand reaches for him, and I revel in the warmth of his palm against mine as my fingers intertwine with his. He turns at my touch, his brows knitted with emotions I can’t seem to decipher while he looks me over.

“I think I should get you back to your flat,” he says.

I try to ignore the thousands of knots in my stomach as the underlying meaning of his words settles in.

“I thought we were going back to yours?”

“No,” he bites back quickly— too quickly . He drops my hand. “I’m going to take you back to your place, and I’m going to head back to mine.”

“Theo,” I breathe. “Please, don’t.”

“Nora,” he sighs exasperatedly, running a hand over the troubled expression on his face. “I just—I think we need to—”

“ What? You think we need to, what?”

He forces his eyes to the ground. “Don’t do that right now.”

“Don’t do what?” I counter, frustrated. Hurt. “Look at me.”

He sighs again and starts back down the sidewalk. “Just let me walk you home.”

I defiantly move to the front of him. “You’re not walking me home. I don’t want to go home. I want to stay with you.”

“Well, I don’t want you to stay with me.”

I flinch.

There’s a hint of guilt in his gaze, but he extinguishes it within the dreadful seconds of silence between us and says, “I think we should take a break right now.”

I swallow the ache swelling in my throat. “That’s what you think?”

“Yeah,” he says, nodding his head, though I’m not convinced there’s any certainty behind the gesture. “I do.”

“You’re a liar, Theo. You’re a liar, and you know it.”

“I’m serious, Nora.”

“Look at me! Please! Talk to me. What is this about? You’re pushing me away, but why? Are you mad at me? Is this about Connor?”

“Let’s not do this tonight, alright?”

“I didn’t know about him and you. I swear, Theo,I did not even have the slightest clue that he was your stepbrother. ”

“It’s not about that. It’s this ,” he mutters, motioning between us. “It’s us. I can’t—I can’t do this.”

I shake my head adamantly. “You’re not pushing me away. I’m not buying into this bullshit.”

“It isn’t bullshit. Connor is right about me, you know. I push people away. That’s what I do. I pushed him away. I pushed Kim away. I pushed Millie away. I’ll push you away eventually, and I don’t want to fuck this up any worse than I already have, so I can’t do this. I won’t do this.”

“Why not? I thought we were moving past this. I thought we agreed to try and make this work, huh?”

“It can’t work.”

“Why not?” I challenge, blinking back the frustrated tears pooling in my eyes. “Why can’t it, Theo?”

“Because I can’t fucking live with myself if I hurt you, Nora!”

The rain starts to fall harder around us, dripping from the ends of our hair and soaking our clothes until the fabric sticks to us like a second skin. We don’t move out of the downpour, though. We stay as we are, staring at each other—quietly acknowledging each other’s existence.

“Then don’t hurt me,” I whisper. “Don’t push me away. Prove yourself wrong. I want to be here for you. I want you to let me be here for you.”

He swallows—so hard that it splinters my heart. There’s so much conflict in his eyes.

“You don’t have to feel bad about it, either.”

His shoulders deflate as he slumps back onto the burgundy brick of the building looming beside us—in relief or distress, I’m not sure.There’s nothing but the sound of our synchronized breaths and nature’s shower pouring around for a few moments until he finally respires, “I do.”

“Don’t,” I say, stepping up to him.

“I feel so bad about it that I fucking hate myself.”

I want to cry at the brokenness weaved in his deep, raspy voice. I want to replace every ounce of diffidence inside of him with my heart’s fondness for him .

I clutch his face in my hands, stroking his stubbled skin until he grows enough courage to look me in the eyes again. “You wouldn’t hate yourself if you saw yourself the way I see you, Theo.”

He melts into my touch, and warmth returns to my cold, goosefleshed body.

“Talk to me. Please,” I tenderly beg him.

He releases a shaky, trembling breath. For a second, I’m sure that he’s not going to say anything at all, but then he starts, “He was with him when it happened. Connor was with my dad when it happened. It should have been me, but it was him. It was him and— and— ”

The rise and fall of his chest quicken, and I softly instruct, “Breathe. I’m right here. All night, remember? Just breathe, baby.”

As that last name falls from my lips, he completely crumbles. He starts to release a cry that I can tell has been locked up tight for years, and I let him. I hold him, cradling his head as he sheds his tears in the crook of my neck. I could collapse at the harrowing sound of his sobs, but I force myself to stand tall—remain unwavering for him.

“I-it took me so long. It took me so long to find them, Nora. If I would’ve been there, I could’ve helped. I could have fucking helped. I hate that Connor was there. I hate that he was there and I wasn’t. I hate that he didn’t do anything. I hate that he just stood there. I wouldn’t have stood there. I would have done something. I would have—I would have—I would have—”

Unforgiving tremors wrack his entire body, pure unrestrained emotion taking hold of every muscle inside him. He’s shaking so fiercely that I can’t help but shudder.

“I know it’s not his fault. I know it isn’t, but if I blame him, I can pretend I don’t blame myself. I can pretend that I don’t fucking hate myself for not being there when everything happened. God, I hate that I wasn’t there. I should have been there, Nora. I should have—”

“Theo, look at me.”

He does, and it shatters me completely.

“I’m s-so fucked up. I am so damn messed up.”

“You aren’ t,” I whisper, wiping away the relentless tears falling from his bloodshot eyes. I draw his forehead to mine and tell him, “You’re just as you should be.”

“You’re too good for me,” he exhales, his steady cries slowly reducing to frequent sniffles. “You don’t deserve to have to deal with this. You deserve someone better. You deserve the best in this world.”

“I want you.”

He laughs cynically. “You’re too fucking sweet for me.”

“And so, what if I am?” I straighten and obstinately face him, feeling a coolness hit the back of my legs as the wet ends of my dress stick to my skin. “I want you. I want all of you. The good. The bad. The fucking ugly, Theo. I want it all. Why can’t I have that? Why can I not want that?”

He splays his hand over the slick skin of my neck, stroking his thumb against my jaw as his eyes savor the features of my face.

“You should want more,” he mumbles, his words laced with such sincere disappointment. “You should want so much more, darling.”

I clutch his hand tightly, soaking in the feeling of his skin flush against mine—drowning myself in the haze of affection that comes over me as my eyes consume the features of his face just the same.

“ I love you .”

The three words leave my mouth without even a flicker of doubt.

I love him.

I love everything about him.

His foul mouth. His quick temper. His thoughtful gestures. His tender touch. His beautiful gray-blue eyes that have a way of making me feel like I’m drenched in sunlight. His witty, smart-ass humor. His kind heart, despite his tough, outward demeanor. His passion for music and devotion to his father and friends— to me .

I love how vulnerable he’s allowed himself to become in just the short few months I’ve known him despite the horrors he’s endured—despite everything inside of him that told him he couldn’t be.

I love him.

“ Nora.”

“ Theo, “ I breathe, my heart hammering in my chest. “ I love you . ”

He pulls his back off the brick behind him, straightening as he swivels me around and presses me back against it. I’m breathing rapidly as he presses his body against mine and tilts my head up. There’s a raw, intense look in his eyes that I’ve never quite seen before as his fingers lace into my damp hair.

“My pretty, sweet thing,” Theo croons, so much sincerity breaking through the words they sound strangled. “ I love you more.”

My body turns molten, my veins burning with a desire and warmth I never knew was possible.

“I love you so fucking much, Nora.”

We make it back to Theo’s flat in what I would assume could be a record-breaking time. The lights are off as we shuffle our dripping bodies inside, but Theo doesn’t bother to turn them on. His hands are too busy exploring the curves of my thighs—too busy bunching up the skirt of my dress around my waist. I shiver as he presses me back against the door and runs a gentle but authoritative palm over my most sensitive parts.

The pressure of his hand is taunting, teasing me of everything to come as it massages me through the mesh stockings still clung to my legs. I gasp when his mouth meets my neck, stifled with pleasure as his lips drag down my chest. Theo’s teeth graze my hardened nipples through the fabric of my dress, and I close my eyes and marinate in the gratifying sensation.

When he finally pulls himself back to look at me, there’s nothing but pure starvation in his eyes.

It’s so feral it almost scares me.

Almost.

“My God,” he pants, still rubbing me—still staring me down with that lethal, dangerous gaze. “It terrifies me how much I can want you, Nora. ”

“It doesn’t terrify me,” I admit, low and breathy.

He smiles wickedly. “It should.”

I yelp as he hoists me into his arms and carries us toward the living room. Slowly— gently —he sets me back against the dark leather of the couch. My heart races as he steps back to inspect me, his substantial form towering over me and watching my limbs grow lax against the soft cushions.

Standing like this, Theo is the unparalleled depiction of dominance— possession.

Tonight, I’m more than happy to be submissive to it.

I shiver as Theo’s fingertips trace up the inner seam of my stockings, starting from the tips of my toes and running up to my thighs. His eyes are glazed with hunger and undiluted need as he brushes a knuckle against my aching cunt.

“You fond of these?”

I smile knowingly. “The stockings?”

“ Mhmm .“ My breath hitches as he pinches the porous fabric.

“Not particularly…”

He cocks his head to the side as he stretches the material back a few times. “You sure?”

“Positive,” I breathe, chest heaving.

“Good.” He yanks the bundle of stockings back so forcefully that the fabric rips open, and he darkly laughs as he stares at the gaping hole in the mesh—my bare, slick folds. “Fucking hell, Nora. Went bare tonight, huh?”

“Makes for easy access.”

He smirks. “Yeah?”

“Yeah, you know… just in case you intended on bending me over and fucking me in between entrees tonight.”

Theo’s entire face lights up. He licks at his lips as if they’ve suddenly gone dry. “Wish you would have told me that before we started eating,” he retorts, pushing a finger inside of me.

A long, taunting stroke in.

A quick, unexpected pullout.

His finger is glistening as he brings it toward his mouth .

“Theo, don’t,” I mutter, suddenly feeling shy— insecure .

He just stares at me defiantly, closes his lips around his finger, and sucks.

“ Mmm . Definitely wish you would have told me before we started eating. You taste significantly better than dinner.”

Theo draws my legs open wider and pushes two fingers inside of me.

“Were you daydreaming about me bending you over and fucking you during dinner, Nora?”

His fingers’ steady, rhythmic movement wraps my entire body in a delightful warmth, and every stroke makes my breathing grow heavier.

He slows his pace for just a moment—changing the rhythm just enough to have my body begging for more. “Answer me, pretty thing.”

“Yes,” I whimper, needing the same cadence he gave me a few breaths ago.

“Yes, what?” He presses a third finger inside of me, rousing my desperation further.

“Theo, please.”

“ Yes. What. ”

He doesn’t give me the satisfaction of inching in further, and I’m so starved for relief that I force myself to answer. “ Yes, I was daydreaming about you bending me over and fucking me. ”

Theo rewards me with a wicked smile and proceeds with the steady pulse of his fingers, working to build up my climax. “You’re bloody trouble, girl.”

“Well, you’re a bad influence.”

The stroke of his three fingers grows rougher at the accusation as if in playful reprimand. “Me?”

“Yes, you.”

I’m unable to hide my moan as his fingers swirl inside me, my eyes rolling back as a potent wave of pleasure washes over me— submerging my entire body .

“I’d argue you’re a worse influence.” He twists his fingers again, praising me, “Especially when you get wet like this baby.”

“I can’t help it,” I whine.

“And I don’t want you to. I like imagining how good you feel around my cock when you’re like this.”

“Then, what are you waiting for?”

I impatiently sit up, unfasten his belt, and unbutton his pants. When I slide his boxers down his hips, his hard-on springs out, and I drink in the sight of his veiny, thick flesh. I give its tip a taunting, quick suck that has his breaths shaking and mine faltering for a beat.

Theo presses me back against the couch, tearing off his shirt and pants in two swift movements before he begins peeling my dress off until every inch of my goose-fleshed skin is exposed. I revel in the sensation of his calloused palm exploring the expanse of my hips, my waist, my ribcage, my breasts….

The pads of his thumbs brush against the peaked flesh of my nipples. “You’re so stunning, Nora.”

“I want you,” I tell him, my voice strained with desperation as I reach for his stiff penis and guide it toward my entrance. “I need you.”

A strained moan rips from his throat as I run the head of him against my wet folds, coaxing him.

“You looked so pretty in your dress tonight,” he croons, inching himself inside me—just far enough to leave me aching to feel the fullness of him. “But I couldn’t stop myself from wanting it off of you so I could remember what you feel like wrapped around me.”

“Remind yourself, then. Please .”

“I intend to,” he smirks, pulling away from me as he rises from the couch. His eyes devour the sight of my naked body strewn against the sofa as he commands, “Don’t move a fucking inch, pretty thing.”

The sound of his quick, heavy footsteps echoes through the darkness of the flat as he ascends the stairs to the loft. I listen as he rustles through drawers and hurries back downstairs.

He’s grinning when he comes back to find me in the exact position he left me in. “Good girl.”

I eagerly watch as he methodically slips a condom over the length of himself. Then, he presses his thumb against my clit and gives it a rewarding massage as he lowers himself to me .

I’m panting as he fits himself back against my throbbing core. “ Oh my, God .”

Theo only lingers there for two quick seconds before he grasps my hips and drives his cock into me. My mind is a million fireworks going off at once as I adjust around him, stretching to accommodate his thickness.

“ Fuck ,“ he bellows.

“I’ve missed this,” I moan, reveling in every considerate inch of him. “I’ve missed this so much, Teddy.”

He feasts against my breasts as he thrusts himself inside of me, maintaining a forceful, steady rhythm that’s in beautiful tandem with every greedy lick he starts to give my nipples.

Every movement we create has me growing wetter around him— literally dripping with pleasure.

“I’m gonna ruin your couch.”

He chuckles darkly and plows into me harder. “Ruin my fucking couch, baby. I want you on every inch of this place. Understand?”

“Okay,” I cry out, leaking with insurmountable satisfaction. “ Okay, baby. Okay. ”

Drawing himself on his knees and pulling my hips up to align with his, he positions himself to watch me as he works me with his cock. He thoroughly studies my face as he slows his thrusts and presses himself deeper.

I could die a happy woman with him buried inside of me like this—could think of no better way to go out than with our two bodies intertwined.

“I love you, Nora.”

“I love you,” I sigh, relief and ecstasy washing over me in an unparalleled balance as he thrusts again. “Just as you are, Theo. I love you.”

Those words free his body from any restraint it might have practiced a breath ago. Theo drives into me over and over and over and over until my body is wracked in wave after wave of euphoria. I cry out his name as I claw my way over the pinnacle of my climax, fingers digging into the rigid muscles of his back to keep my soul tethered to my body .

Every inch of me is trembling as he rocks into me, reaching the peak of his own pleasure as he releases inside of me, groaning as he fills the condom.

Our bodies finally grow still against one another. Theo pulls out of me, gently pulls me atop him, and lays back against the cushions of the couch. With our warm skins flush with one another, he holds me until our racing hearts dim to a slow and steady beat again.

Our fingers find their way into each other’s disheveled hair, mirroring strokes.

When I lift my chest to glance at Theo, I see a thoughtful look in his eyes. “What are you thinking about, handsome thing?”

“ I’m thinking that you’re it for me.”