Page 21 of Meet Me at the Metro (Gildenhill #1)

21

ALL YOURS

E L L I E

“ T heo!” I shout, shaking his shoulders roughly to wake him up. “Theo! Wake up!”

My heart is beating so hard as I watch his body writhe with distress beneath the sheets. A cold sweat breaks out against his forehead, and his brows are furrowed, contorting his face into a terrified expression.

He’s having a nightmare.

“Theo!”

“ Let me go, ” he cries hoarsely, shoving my hands away. His eyelids fly open, but he continues to fight me away. “Get off! Let me go! I can’t leave him.”

“Theo, please! You’re dreaming. Wake up!”

“ Let me go! I can’t leave him! Let me fucking go! ”

“Come on, Teddy,” I whimper, afraid this might never end. “Please, wake up!”

I shake him hard one last time, putting all of my strength into it to snap him out of his lucid state. He finally wakes up, gasping for air—his chest rising and falling violently. His eyes widen as they adjust to the darkness of his bedroom and begin to recognize the walls around him.

“It’s okay,” I tell him softly, placing my hands against his face and gently encouraging him to look at me. “You were just dreaming. It’s over now.”

Slowly—gradually—he relaxes beneath me. I think he’s calming his mind from its state of panic until his eyes settle on mine, and his body goes taut. The muscles in his jaw tighten as a look of shame evolves on his face.

He pushes me off him and bolts out of the bed.

“Theo, wait!”

He doesn’t. He storms into the bathroom and slams the door, leaving me to sit alone in the silence left in his wake.

I crawl to the edge of the bed and just wait for a couple of moments, listening closely to the sounds beyond the barrier now between us. There’s a draw of a shower curtain before the loud rush of the faucet. I contemplate whether I should give him space or interrupt the possible assumptions he’s making—like assuming that what I just saw scared me or that I couldn’t handle it.

My gut instincts carry my feet to the bathroom door, and I open it before I can stop myself. Steam is already billowing above the shower, filling the small space and fogging up the sink vanity’s mirror. My heart is beating nervously as I quietly step further into the bathroom. Theo’s heavy breaths are audible even over the noise of the shower stream.

“Teddy,” I whisper, not wanting to startle him.

“Nora, please .”

“Don’t push me away,” I beg.

I hear him take a deep, shaky exhale.

I have no clue what comes over me when I slowly and carefully pull the damp shower curtain back, but he doesn’t shy away as I expose his naked body. He’s too busy working on slowing his breathing, his fingers clutching the roots of his hair tightly. I try not to let the sight of him falter me.

Even broken like this, he still looks so hauntingly heavenly.

I swallow as the water rushes down the solid lines and grooves of his chest and abdomen. I’m thankful his gaze doesn’t settle on mine as it soaks up every inch of him because I need a few seconds to gather myself and steady my racing nerves.

Finally, I find it in myself to speak again. “I don’t want you to feel ashamed or embarrassed. It’s all okay.”

“It’s not okay,” he snaps. “None of this is fucking okay. Don’t you understand that? ”

“No,” I shake my head fervently, “I don’t.”

“It’s not okay for me to pull you into this. I’ve got so much to sort out about myself. So much ugly, messed up shit that I’d be dragging you through, Nora. I can’t do that.”

“You aren’t dragging me through anything, Theo. I want this. I love being with you— being us.”

“You love being with me?” he scoffs. “What exactly is it that you love? These panic episodes? The mood swings? Do you love the way I act like I’m acting right fucking now? This isn’t ideal. I don’t see how I can ever make this work. I’m going to ruin you, Nora.”

The words make me angry and hurt. Who said that he got the say in everything between us? He doesn’t get to decide what I appreciate about him or what I find ideal for me.

“God, would you stop with all this assuming bullshit!?” He flinches . “I love being with you because I get tickled by every foul word that rolls off your tongue. I love being with you because you challenge me and because you make me laugh—like, actually, really laugh. And most of all, I love being with you because I get to see this side of you that barely anyone else gets the bliss of knowing.

“Do you remember what you told me, Theo? About how your mind is quiet when we’re together. Well, it’s the same for me, too.”

He doesn’t say anything back to that; he just stands there beneath the stream of water, staring at me.

“Is it me? Because if you don’t want me— or us— or whatever the hell this is, then just say the words. I won’t bother you anymore. But if this is your way of telling me what’s best for me, then you don’t have a say.”

“It’s not you,” he mutters. “It’s not that simple, Nora.”

“Yes, it is. It’s a simple question. Do you want me or not?”

“Yes,” he sighs, “Fuck, you know I do.”

I peel his oversized T-shirt off of my body, letting it fall to the floor, along with my panties, before stepping into the steamy downpour with him. I take a step toward him, allowing the water to soak my skin.

“Then just be with me.” I press my naked body against his back and allow my hands to trail to the expanse of his chest. “Tell the thoughts running through your head to shut up and let us be. Stop trying to push me away just because you think I can’t handle this.”

Finally, after several long moments, he turns to me. His eyes search mine as if they’re looking for some kind of a loophole in what I just said. I place his hand against the soft skin of my stomach, leading it up until it’s covering my breast. Theo’s breath hitches as his palm meets the pebbled flesh, but I encourage him to touch me, clutching his hand tighter.

“Say the exact words,” I breathe.

“I want you.” He wraps his other hand around the small of my back and draws me against him. “I want every fucking morsel of you, Nora.”

“You don’t need my permission.” He moans as I reach down and grip his already-hard penis, starting to stroke it slowly. “I’m all yours if you let yourself have me.”

Maybe we just need to let our bodies help us speak.

Theo grabs onto my wet hair, tugging my head back so that it’s tilted to his advantage. His mouth collides with mine, and I let my thoughts dissipate to nothing but the feel of his lips and the dominance of his hands as they begin exploring my body. He sucks the skin of my neck between his teeth as he brings his palm down to the apex of my legs. My back meets the tiled wall of the shower as his body presses against mine, and his hand starts massaging my cunt.

“I haven’t been able to stop dreaming about touching you again. Do you know how badly I’ve wanted to feel you since the other night?”

“Probably not nearly as much as I wanted to feel you,” I moan, feeling his cock heat beneath my palm as I begin pumping his shaft a little faster— a lot harder .

He growls, “You’re wrong about that.”

“So show me then,” I challenge, looking him dead in the eyes. “Show me how badly I’ve been haunting your dreams.”

Theo jerks his cock out of my hands and shuts off the water. I yelp as he hitches me into his arms, carries me out of the shower, and sets me down against the countertop of the sink. My wet skin is slick against its cool, glossy surface, but he holds onto me, keeping me in place. He reaches toward the mirror and wipes some of its built-up condensation away.

“What are you—”

“I’m going to show you, Nora. Exactly like you asked me to.” Theo seizes my jaw and turns my head to look at our reflection in the mirror. He’s just tall enough that when he stands, he meets perfectly against me. “I need to grab a condom first.”

“I’m taking the pill,” I say impatiently. He gives me a long look in the mirror. I genuinely can’t help but whine, “Show me. Please, Teddy .”

I think that name does it for him because he grabs my hips and presses the tip of his cock against my wet slit, inching it just a little inside of me. He tosses his head back and lets out a pent-up groan, like this alone is nearly enough to satisfy him.

Honestly, I’m right there with him.

Theo’s eyes are wide with desire as he slowly presses himself further into me. I cry out the deeper he goes, the sensation of him stretching me out too overwhelming to keep quiet.

My muscles become tight around him, and he pants, “ Oh fuck .” My head falls back against the wall, my mouth gaping in silent, delighted agony at the reflection of his hard-on inside of me. “Look how fucking gorgeous you are.”

I nearly melt at the praise. “You feel so good,” I whimper.

He lets out a sexy, low chuckle. “Only half of my cock is inside of you, Nora.”

“So let me have the rest of it,” I order, though the sound of my voice is so pathetically weak. It’s taking all of my strength to speak.

In answer, he pushes his hips in further. A burst of pleasure rips through me as he finally gives me the entire length—and girth—of himself.

Theo releases a long, distressed, and strained moan. “How do I feel now?”

I recall his words from earlier tonight and smile. “ Fucking sublime .”

When I don’t think this could get or feel any better, he starts moving inside of me—thrusting in and out so flawlessly that all the limbs of my body go lax. Then, without warning, he begins to move faster.

Harder . Rougher.

Theo starts fucking me so vigorously that I begin questioning if I ever really knew what sex was before because the feeling of this right now is a gratification that my body didn’t even know existed.

“I’ve wanted this so bad,” he groans, watching us— watching me . Every quickened movement and slap of his skin against mine has me growing slicker. “You see now how fucking bad I’ve been wanting you?”

“Yes,” I pant, submitting myself to him completely. Surrendering every vulnerable piece of myself. “ Teddy , I can’t stand it.”

“Yes, you can, stubborn thing. You can take it. Look how well you’re doing right now.”

And that’s precisely what I do—I look, watching with wide eyes as he spreads my legs wider against the countertop and splays them open so that he can take me deeper. He rocks inside of me until I can’t distinguish between pain and pleasure anymore.

“It’s too good, Theo. It’s too much,” I whimper, feeling the crest of my orgasm reaching its peak. “Oh, shit. I’m—about—to— ”

“Do it, darling. I dare you.”

“ Oh, fuuu— ”

His hand muffles the last syllable of that word as I release against him, my body once again becoming a trembling, shaking mess beneath his touch. Though he doesn’t stop moving inside of me as I come, he keeps thrusting into me—so thoroughly that my body jerks as it reaches an overwhelming climax. Then, crying out my name and pulling out of me swiftly, he finishes against my clit.

I can’t think—can barely even move as his body slumps against mine.

Our skins are soaking wet, and I can’t decipher if we’re so damp from the leftovers from our shower, pure sweat, or something else entirely.

When we’re both done recovering from the intoxication of one another, Theo thoughtfully grabs a towel and wipes his and my mess off of me. Then, he picks me up off the counter and gently sets me back down on my feet. Despite how unsteady my legs are right now, I do my best to stay planted on them .

We dry ourselves off and slither back beneath the sheets of his bed, not bothering to put a single item of our clothes back on. Cuddling with him was so much better when we were skin–to–skin.

I rest my head against his chest, breathing in his earthly scent as he brushes my wet hair behind my ears. We’re silent as we lay together like this, soaking in each other’s company. After a few minutes, Theo admits, “I didn’t know having sex with someone could feel that good.”

I immediately blush, having a hard time believing that considering how well he just handled me. “You’re such a liar.”

“I am not.” He tilts my chin up to look him in the eye. “I’m serious, Nora. It’s never felt that good before.”

He kisses the top of my head, and it effaces every bit of my insecurities. “Good,” I grin, “because I’ll be wanting you to fuck me like that again.”

“Keep talking like that, and I’ll be doing that the second my dick fully recovers.”

“ Promise? ”

Theo pushes me back against the bed and clambers over me, eyes darkening as they roam across my relaxed, naked body. “I swear to you.”