Page 1 of It Happened Back Then (Nilsson Family #3)

“Let’s run away.”

“Run away?” I ask as I meet his serious gaze. “Where would we go?”

Bennett shrugs. “I don’t know, anywhere but here.”

Sure, I’d love to run away and start over. Heck, if I could erase the last five years of my life, I would. Everything about living in Bluemoon used to be perfect, back then, when I didn’t know anything but love in my family.

I never thought our family would be destroyed in the blink of an eye. I never thought life would crush my dreams.

It’s been five years since my dad died, two years since my sister took off for New York, and one year since my brother went with her.

Now, it’s just me, Mom, and my other sister, Meadow, in the house, and it’s the weirdest feeling to go from a full house of six to a lonely house of three.

Actually, it’s more like a lonely house of two because Meadow doesn’t come home most nights.

I don’t know where she goes, but she isn’t home with us.

Those nights are the worst, because I hear Mom crying and I have to be the strongest one in the home even though I’m the baby of the family.

Five years later and we’re still no closer to moving on than we were the day it happened.

Thank god for my best friend, Bennett. He’s been with me since day one, and even when everything crashed around me, he didn’t leave. He’s the only one I can count on.

“What if we ran away and followed January and Lief to New York?” I ask, my voice barely above a whisper.

“Why don’t we make our own plans? Do you really want to go to New York?”

“Well, at least we wouldn’t be alone.”

“You have me; you're never alone.”

I sigh, and even though everything inside me wants to scream, ‘ Yes! Take me away! ’ instead I respond, “I can’t leave Mom, Bennett. Meadow is always god knows where, and I don’t know if Lief or January will ever come home. And Dad would hate me forever if I left Mom.”

He takes my hand, intertwining his fingers with mine. “You’re right. I wouldn’t want you to feel bad about doing that.”

I sit quietly, looking around his small bedroom. It’s filled with magazines about cooking, posters of race cars, and pictures of him and I in school. “I miss him so much. I just can’t figure out how to move on from here.”

“We’re sixteen, Blossom. We have our entire lives ahead of us, and we get to write it the way we want it.”

“What do you want from it?” I ask him.

“I want everything with you,” he says, and I pull back, confused by his words.

I’ve had a crush on Bennett since we were ten years old, but I never thought he saw me that way.

Sure, we hung out all the time, ate at each other's homes, snuck in through each other's bedroom windows, but I didn’t think he saw me as a girlfriend.

“Well, we’re friends,” I say, testing the waters. “We're always gonna be together.”

A blush creeps up his neck and cheeks but his eyes are focused on me when he responds, “No. I want forever with you. I want to be more than just friends.”

My heart races at his declaration. Bennett has changed so much from the ten-year-old kid he was to the sixteen-year-old guy sitting in front of me. He’s tall and is filling out more, and though sometimes I still feel like we’re just kids, to me, he’s a man. A handsome man that I’ve fallen for.

Bennett pulls me closer, and all of a sudden, everything shifts between us. The way he’s holding my hand feels different. The way his other hand rests on my thigh gives me tingles in my belly. And the way he drops his gaze to my lips and back to my eyes makes me realize we’re not kids anymore.

“Bennett, do you mean…” I trail off, unsure how I want to word my question, and a bit scared to have it out in the universe.

“I love you, Peach,” he replies solemnly. “I’ve always loved you, and I want to be the man to take care of you. I just regret that I’ll never get to ask your dad’s permission.”

“Permission for what?”

He gives a shy smile as he says, “Permission to date you, to marry you.”

“Marry me! Bennett, we’re sixteen!”

He sits up on the bed. “I know, I know, but listen. Can we make a pact tonight? Right now? Can we make a promise to each other?”

“A pact?”

“I don’t ever want to lose you, Blossom, but I know things could change if we go away to college or if something actually happens with your family and you move, and I don’t want that.

We have to make a pact tonight that, if we aren’t here, we will come back to Bluemoon in ten years, and find each other, no matter what. ”

“I’m not going anywhere,” I respond with a wave of my hand. “I’m not leaving Bluemoon.”

“You say that now, but we never know what could happen over ten years. We may be dating someone, maybe it’s serious, maybe we’ll be mar?—”

“Bennett,” I exclaim, interrupting his tirade. “You can’t wait for me! Ten years is a long time!”

“But if we’re not?” He takes my hand, his gaze earnest as he says, “I want us to remember this, right now, and be together. I want to be the one to marry you and make you happy.”

Mind racing, my heart flutters in my chest, pure giddiness rushing over me as I listen to him tell me how much he loves me and wants me.

Perhaps it’s the loss of my family making me feel this way, but at the end of it all, Bennett has been my rock, a solid presence in my life. So, why shouldn’t I agree?

Once again, intense emotion overwhelms me, reminding me of my previous feeling that there has always been a lot more than friendship between us. Maybe it’s being in his small room, on his bed while he holds me that has me feeling bold. Safe. Protected.

I swallow hard, making a quick decision that I want this with him and don’t want to lose it. I don’t want to lose this feeling we have right now, and I don’t want to lose him. “I’ll agree to the pact if we make it official right now.”

His breathing picks up and he presses his lips together, his Adam's apple bobs in his throat. I sit up and grab a piece of paper and pen from his desk, quickly jotting down our pact. I sign it and hand it to him, waiting for his signature. After he pens his name to the page, I toss the pen and paper aside then settle on top of him, climbing over his body and straddling him. “I don’t know what I’m doing, but I know how I feel right now. Tell me you want it, too.”

He rests his hands lightly on my hips, his eyes searching mine as he asks, “What are you saying, Blossom?”

With a shy smile and a hard swallow, I nod, growing secure in my thoughts. “I want you to be my first.”

I can hear his heart begin to pound and feel his body tightening beneath me.

He moves his hands to rest gently on my waist, like he’s afraid to hold on too tight, but also afraid this moment isn’t real, that we’re both going to wake up and find none of this happened.

We look at each other and I realize I see everything I’ve always needed - friendship, loyalty, safety.

And most of all love.

I’ve loved him since I was ten, even if I wasn’t sure what that meant.

He shifts slightly, brushing a stray strand of hair from my cheek, his touch feather-light as he whispers, “You’re sure?”

I nod, my heart racing as I say, “I’ve never been more sure of anything.”

He exhales loudly at my answer then pulls me into his arms. We stay like that for a long moment, just wrapped up in each other, letting the world settle around us.

There’s no grief here, no broken family, no missing people. Just us.

Then we ease apart, and he kisses me, slowly at first, both of us laughing as we fumble with our clothes, a shirt here, a sock there. I yank at my jeans, muttering, “The movies make this look easy.”

Bennett stands and drops his shorts then grabs the other leg of my jeans, pulling me down the bed slightly. “That was supposed to look sexy.”

I reach for him, and he falls as we lay tangled together, both of us obviously having no idea what we’re doing, but allowing our feelings and nature to lead us.

Afterward, we lay back on the bed, tangled together under his worn blanket, my head on his chest, his fingers trailing soft lines on my back as he asks, “What are you thinking?”

I’m quiet for amoment, trying to find the right way to say this. I shrug and he squeezes me, urging me to answer honestly. Sighing heavily, I finally mutter, “So, that was it, huh?”

Chuckling, he wraps both arms around me, not at all offended by what I’m insinuating. “Don’t worry, Peach. We’ll learn how to do it properly, together.”

I snuggle closer, a smile playing on my lips as he presses a soft kiss against my forehead then relaxes into the mattress, content to believe we have our future sorted.

For better or worse.