Page 34 of I Could Be Yours (The Toronto Terror #6)

ESSIE

O nce everyone’s meals have been cleared at the rehearsal dinner, Tristan’s dad stands and taps the edge of his pint glass, then brings two fingers to his lips and whistles shrilly to get everyone’s attention.

He and Sophia are seated at a table with my parents and Rix’s.

They’re all smiling and laughing. My mom is tucked into my dad’s side, and Howard’s arm is draped across Muffy’s chair.

They’re both couple goals. They have the kind of love I want for myself: limitless and enduring.

Gideon smiles and runs a hand over his tie, waiting for everyone to settle. “I wanted to take a moment to celebrate Tristan and Rix,” he begins.

I set a packet of tissues on the table in front of Rix. She hugs my arm and kisses my cheek, then snuggles into Tristan’s side.

Gideon turns toward the happy couple. “Tristan, I am so proud of you.” He glances around the room, gaze stopping briefly at Brody and then Nate. “I’m proud of all my boys.”

A round of applause follows, and he waits until the group settles before he continues.

“Tristan, you have accomplished so much in your young life. You’ve always been determined, and when you set a goal, you work hard to achieve it.

Your dedication to being the best you possibly can is not limited to your hockey career. ”

“You’re a superstar!” Brody shouts.

“I’m pretty sure he’s drunk,” Rix whispers.

“Oh yeah, absolutely,” Tristan agrees.

“Drink a glass of water, son,” Gideon says.

Everyone chuckles.

Brody sinks into his chair. Chase passes him the pitcher of water.

Gideon turns back to Tristan. “You brought that dedication and determination to your relationship with Rix. You’ve both worked so hard to be the partner each other deserves.

Watching you grow and learn together has been inspiring.

I don’t think either of you realizes how much you’ve taught me.

” He pauses and clears his throat. “We should all be so lucky to have the kind of love you share. To your future and everything it holds.” He raises his glass in a toast.

Rix and Tristan push their chairs back and round the table.

Tristan and his dad hug each other tightly, both clearly emotional.

And then Gideon folds Rix into a hug. She’s a weepy mess when he lets her go.

Tristan tenderly curves his hand around the side of her neck, thumb sweeping across the edge of her jaw as he brushes his nose against hers.

I dab under my eyes with a tissue, my love for them too big to keep inside.

I glance to the left, where Nate sits two chairs down, hands folded in his lap.

He glances my way for a second. I wish I knew what was happening in his head.

Something has shifted. When he came to my room to help me pick my dress he was…

sweet. And very focused on me and my needs.

I need to keep reminding myself that he’s not someone I can give my heart to.

But it’s hard when he cuddles me all night and tells me how sexy my spreadsheets are.

Rix and Tristan take their seats again. I hug Rix and free another tissue from the pack, tipping her chin up so I can dab under her eyes.

She laughs and sniffles. “Am I melting?”

“No. You’re perfect. I’m just fussing.”

She hugs me. “I love you.”

“I love you back.”

Flip moves to the front of the room. He’s dressed in khaki shorts and a short-sleeved white button-down. He sets his bottle of water on the podium and smiles at the crowd. “How’s everyone doing tonight?”

“Feeling no pain!” Chase shouts.

“Seriously, slow down, you two.” Flip motions between Chase and Brody.

Brody holds up his glass of water, face turning red.

The crowd chuckles.

“I just wanted to, uh, take a minute to express how much Tristan and Rix mean to me, to all of us here.” Flip’s eyes are already glassy. He blows out a breath. “Man, I’ve got a lot of feelings, and they’re all right here.” He taps his throat, then the corner of his eye. “And apparently here.”

Tally hops up from her table near the podium and sets a travel packet of tissues next to him.

She squeezes his arm and leans in to whisper something before she rushes back to her seat.

She’s sitting next to Fee, Dred on her other side.

Callie, who is all of nine, is tucked into Connor’s side, like he’s her own personal, tattooed bean bag.

“Thanks, Talls.” Flip plucks a tissue from the packet. “Okay, now I’m really ready.”

Everyone laughs again.

Rix hooks her arms through mine and Tristan’s, her expression soft.

“Tris, I’ll start with you.” Flip smiles at his best friend. “We’ve had a lot of years of friendship and some real ups and downs. We’ve seen each other through some tough times and some fan-freaking-tastic ones. Like winning the Cup. ”

“Five-star moment for sure,” Tristan calls.

“I know it hasn’t always been easy, but I love you, man.

You’ve been a rock my entire life, and I am damn proud to call you my friend.

You have worked so hard to be what Rix needs, and I’m forever grateful that the two of you believed in what you had and didn’t let anyone stand in your way.

Especially me, because we all know I have a hard time getting out of my own way most of the time. ” He laughs and shakes his head.

“I love you, buddy.” Tristan taps his fingers over his heart.

They give each other a nod. It’s an unspoken apology and forgiveness.

Flip’s gaze shifts to Rix, and his smile softens. “Trixie Rixie, my beautiful baby sister. You are a force, and I am so thankful for you. The sacrifices you’ve made for me are too many to count.”

Her smile is full of affection. “They weren’t sacrifices, Phillip. I always knew you were destined for greatness.”

He points at Rix. “This is what I’m talking about. You always put others ahead of yourself, forever the caretaker, just like our mom.” He blows a kiss to Muffy before he turns back to Rix. “Even when we were kids, you tried to take care of me.”

“Carrot chips and ranch dip,” Muffy yells.

Rix throws her head back and laughs.

Flip addresses the crowd. “Exactly. Whether you were trying to get me to eat healthy, or manage my investments, or just making me own my shit.” Flip clears his throat. “You are beyond remarkable, little sister. And the way you and Tristan take care of each other is a true inspiration.”

“We had amazing role models.” Rix blows a kiss to her parents.

“The best, right?” Flip nods to his parents, then turns back to Tristan and Rix.

“There are so many great times ahead, so much to look forward to and celebrate, and I know when things get tough, you two will hold each other up. The commitment you’re making to each other, to have someone’s unconditional love, a person who will never leave, even when it gets tough—” he clears his throat.

“Marriage is so special, and it’s such an honor to be part of this with you.

Your devotion to each other has made me want to be a better person for myself and the people I love.

I adore you both. I’ll always be in your corner, rooting for you.

Thank you for sharing your hearts with all of us.

” He raises his glass. “To Tristan and Rix and a lifetime of love.”

The crowd echoes Flip, and Tristan and Rix get up to hug him. Their parents join them, and they’re a mass of love and laughter and happy tears.

Nate pushes his chair away from the table and ducks out the back of the tent. People leave their chairs and head for the bar while Muffy and Howard set up the slideshow. Everyone is occupied, so I follow Nate. He stops and leans against a palm tree, eyes on the ocean.

At the clip of my heels, his head swivels my way.

“Hey.”

“Hey.” He extends his hand as I near him.

I step out of my heels, leaving them on the boardwalk as I slip my fingers in his and move onto the grass with him. “You okay?”

“I just needed some air.”

I don’t comment on the fact that we’ve been sitting under an outdoor tent, breathing in the salty ocean breeze.

All of this is a trigger for Nate, I’ve come to realize.

The wedding, people being in love, families coming together to support and celebrate.

He wants to be a good brother to Tristan, but it also hurts.

He tucks a lock of my hair behind my ear, his gaze shifting back to the ocean. He’s so beautiful and brilliant and sad, and it makes my heart ache. I’m afraid to dig into his pain, but I don’t want to leave him here hurting alone.

“It’s okay if this is hard for you,” I whisper.

He sighs, the sound heavy with hidden emotion. “I’m happy for them.”

“You can be happy for someone else and still feel pain.” I give in to the desire to comfort him and gently skim his arm. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

“You’re here. That helps.”

I see the little boy who was left by someone who was supposed to love him unconditionally, and has become a man who fears the pain that love can bring when it’s taken away. “Can I hug you?”

His eyes lift and he nods once.

I step forward and wrap my arms around his waist. He drops his head, pressing his face against my neck as he squeezes me tightly.

I run my hand up and down his back, soothing him. “It’s okay that you’re struggling, Nate.”

“I wish I wasn’t, though,” he whispers. “I wish this didn’t hurt. I wish I could just be happy and not afraid.”

“We don’t always get to choose the emotions we feel, but we do get to choose how we allow them to rule us.”

He pulls back and strokes my cheek. “You’re a beautiful person, Essie.”

“Voted hottest in my class four years in a row,” I joke and immediately hate how I’ve twisted his compliment to mirror my own fears and vulnerabilities.

That furrow I adore so much appears. “I don’t need to tell you you’re pretty on the outside.” He taps gently over my heart. “This part of you is what makes you so incredible.”

“Thanks.” My heart stutters a beat.