Page 29 of I Could Be Yours (The Toronto Terror #6)

ESSIE

I set my book on the table and stretch. I was right to kick Nate out early this morning. Rix came knocking on my door twenty minutes after he left, looking to grab coffee.

We followed it up with a group brunch—I sat at the other end of the table from Nate so I wouldn’t accidentally flirt with him. We’ve been lounging by the pool since. “What time is it?”

“Just after noon. What’s up?” Rix asks.

“I scheduled a private yoga session for us girls. We should get cleaned up and head over.”

“I would have joined you for yoga,” Flip says.

“Bond with the bros and do something competitive. We’ll see you in a couple of hours.” Rix, the girls, and I gather our stuff and stop by our rooms to freshen up.

I rinse off quickly in the shower, change into a pair of yoga shorts and a sports bra, and grab my bag and a gift I picked up for Rix on the way out of my room. I stop at Rix and Tristan’s suite, crossing my fingers as I knock on her door.

“Who is it?” she calls.

“Your bestie!”

She opens the door dressed in yoga shorts and a crop top, looking relieved. “Thank God. ”

“Did Tristan follow you back and try to seduce you?”

“Yeah, but I put the safety latch on. There is no such thing as a quickie with him. It’s always a marathon of orgasms.”

“It’s a hard life, being engaged to a hockey player who loves you to pieces.

” A pang of guilt hits me over the fact that I’m hiding things from her.

But what’s going on with me and Nate has an expiration date.

We don’t want the same things. I have my heart set on the fairy tale.

I want someone who believes that love conquers all.

I want a family and a cat named Teacup and a dog named Sparkles.

I want romance and eventually babies and growing old and wrinkly together.

I want someone who will love me even when the beauty fades.

Rix’s face gets all dreamy for a moment. “Tristan is a really dedicated fiancé.”

“He is. I’m so glad you fought for each other.”

“Me too.” She smiles. “Let’s go do yoga with the girls.”

We meet up with them and walk over to the studio.

“Thank you for setting this up for us.” Hemi’s arm is around Shilpa’s shoulders. “I love that we’re getting in some quality time that doesn’t include a sports competition with the boys.”

“Agreed! I love that the guys want to do things, but I can’t be high octane every moment.” Hammer rolls her head on her shoulders. “I could definitely use some yoga to stretch out all my tight muscles.”

“Is that from the volleyball game earlier, or your alone time with Hollis?” Rix asks.

The guys spent about five minutes lounging before they became restless and decided beach volleyball was a good idea. They do nothing at a leisurely pace.

“Both.” Hammer cringes and looks at Lexi. “I probably shouldn’t admit these things in front of you.”

Lexi shrugs. “Technically I know I’m your stepmom, which is all kinds of weird for both of us, but I view you as a friend.

I will never repeat any of this to Roman, because it’s better that he lives in the land of make-believe where you do none of the things the rest of us do with our partners behind closed doors. ”

Hammer hugs Lexi. “I appreciate you.”

We enter the yoga studio, grab mats, and get comfortable as the instructor introduces herself.

It’s exactly what we all need—an hour of time with friends, without extreme cardio and testosterone.

Shilpa falls asleep fifteen minutes in. The instructor covers her with a blanket and tucks a pillow under her head before the rest of us continue.

“Jeez, you’re bendy,” Dred says when I move into the advanced form of pigeon pose.

“I took gymnastics for a lot of years, and I was a cheerleader in high school and university.” I often keep this kind of personal information to myself because people put me in a box labeled too pretty to have a brain , but I feel safe with these girls.

She nods. “That definitely explains the bendiness.”

“And yes, I dated the quarterback.” It was so cliché.

“Was he the hottest guy in the school?” Hammer asks.

“Tristan was the hottest back then, closely followed by Flip,” I explain.

“But the quarterback ranked third overall,” Rix chimes in. “What was his name again, Ess?”

“Jett Hudson.” I gave him devil horns in my yearbook.

“Oh, that name screams hot jock,” Dred replies.

“Right? He was such a bad choice.” I roll my eyes.

“Did he know he was hot shit?” Hemi asks.

I nod. “Oh yeah, totally.”

“But like, Essie was a legend in high school,” Rix says.

“I was not,” I mutter.

“She’s lying. She was named the hottest girl in school every single year from grade nine through twelve,” Rix explains.

“Was it in the yearbook?” Dred asks.

“Unfortunately, yes.”

“Kind of sucks when people put you in a box based on one quality,” Hemi says softly .

I nod. “Yeah, but Rix and I had each other, and that’s what mattered.”

“Always and forever my bestie.” Rix reaches across the mat, and we link pinkies and smile.

High school was fun, and I was invited to every party, but no one expected me to make the honor roll or be the one with the answers.

I was pretty and popular, fun to be around—the girl guys wanted to date but not get serious with.

After a while, I started to believe that’s who I was, too.

I stopped fighting the stereotype. I thought I was beyond that, but the compliments from Nate about being math smart hit a soft part of me that longs to be seen completely.

After yoga, most of the girls head back to their rooms, and Rix and I stop in the lobby for a fruit shake. We find a table in the shade and drag our chairs close enough that our shoulders touch.

“I have something for you.” I pull a small bag tied with ribbon out of my purse and set it on the table in front of her.

“You’ve already done so much, Ess. You don’t need to buy me gifts.”

“It’s just little. No big thing, I promise.”

Rix pulls the ribbon free and reaches inside, withdrawing the first small box. She throws her head back and laughs. “Oh my gosh, where in the world did you get this wrapping paper?”

“It’s amazing, isn’t it?”

“The most amazing.” It’s covered in a pattern of smiling cucumbers.

“I’ll get you some for Tristan’s birthday.”

“That would be magical.” She carefully opens the small box and hugs it to her chest. “Oh my gosh, are they all French mint?”

“Absolutely. You’ll need to put them in the fridge when you get back to your room, so they don’t turn into a chocolate puddle.” I picked up a small box of her favorite chocolates.

“I will savor every single one.” She tucks them into her bag and moves it into the shade. Next she opens the travel pack of her favorite lotion and shampoo. “How did you know I was almost out?”

“You mentioned you were running low in Vegas, and I wasn’t sure you’d have time to pick up more before we came here. There’s one more thing.”

She unwraps the smallest box. Inside is a pair of custom-made smiling cucumber earrings.

She bursts out laughing and then bursts into tears.

I wrap my arms around her.

“These are joy tears. I’m so lucky to have you, Ess. I’m so glad you moved back to Toronto. Let’s never be apart again, okay?”

“Never again,” I agree. Although, Tristan’s career could take them somewhere else in the future, depending on contracts. But for now, we’re together. “I’m so happy that we’re here in this beautiful place, and I get to celebrate this with you.” I gently wipe her tears.

“How did I get so lucky, Ess? You’re the best best friend in the world. My fiancé is incredible, and I have fabulous friends and a supportive family.”

“You didn’t get lucky, Rix. You attracted all these people to you by being who you are. People love you. People want you to succeed and be happy. Tristan knows how special you are. We all do. I’m so glad you’ve found your person. It brings me so much joy to see you in such a good place.”

She squeezes my hand. “You’ll find your person, too, Ess.”

“I want what my parents have. I want what you have with Tristan.” I shift and rest my chin on my knuckles. “But instead of Prince Charming, I always seem to pick the ones who are bad for me.”

“Do you think it’s because you’re not ready for the one?” Rix asks softly.

“Maybe.” I’ve thought about this a lot lately—the reasons for all these dead-end relationships.

“In Vancouver, I kept dating all these pretty-boy B-list actors with connections.” I swallow past the lump in my throat, because admitting this, even to my best friend, is hard.

“But no one expected me to have input, or thoughts, or ideas. I was just the pretty makeup artist.” And of course I could come to the next party as long as I could do their makeup.

I sigh. It was like this in high school, too. I was always the hot girl, and Rix was my smart, pretty best friend. She never worried about what other people thought the way I do.

Her eyes soften. “You’re so much more than a pretty face, Ess. You’re creative, smart, kind, thoughtful, and one of my favorite people in the world.”

“And you’re my favorite, forever and always.”

“Are you happier back in Toronto?”

When I’m with Rix and the Babe Brigade, I’m just me, and they love and accept me as I am. So do my parents and my sister. “Yeah, the girls are amazing friends, and I won’t fall back into the trap of dating actors.”

“Has this job been better for you?”

“In Vancouver it was movie sets with a rotating cast and odd hours, but now it’s stable, and my hours are normal. The people I work with are more down-to-earth. I have more time to spend with the people who matter to me. Like you.”

“I’m so glad you’re back. I loved that you were doing your thing, but I missed you so much.”

I hug her arm. “I missed you, too. I’m really glad I get to be here with you and be part of your special day. And do your makeup! I feel like I’ve been training for it with all the girls’ nights out over the past year.”

“You’re an artist with a makeup brush.” She tips her head. “Have you ever thought about transitioning to wedding makeup?”

I scrunch my nose. “I helped out with a couple when I was training in school, and while it’s cool that you get to be with people on what’s supposed to be one of the happiest days of their lives, there is also the opportunity to really fuck it up for them.”

Rix cringes. “Are you speaking from experience?”

“Personal? No. But I’ve heard the horror stories. Also, I’d always have to work on the weekend.”

“True.”

“I like working on a set where I can be creative, but I also know what’s coming at me most of the time. The bridezilla factor is a real thing.”

“Am I a bridezilla?” Rix looks suddenly worried.

“No.” I laugh. “Not even a little. You want things to go smoothly. You want your special day to be good, not just for your sake, but for everyone and especially for Tristan. You know how much work it took to get where you are, so it makes sense that you want the day to be a good one.”

She squeezes my hand. “I hope I can be half as helpful when it’s your turn.”

I smile, but there’s a lump in my throat as I force any image of me in a wedding dress out of my head. “You will be the best matron of honor.”

But I’m afraid I’ll never be where she is. That I’ll never be the one for someone.

The Nate I’ve come to know is softer and sweeter than anyone realizes, and it would be so easy to open my heart to that side of him.

It would also be totally on brand for me to fall for another guy whose life vision doesn’t align with mine.

We can have fun this week, but when the wedding is over, so are we.

It’s the only way to keep my silly heart from being broken again.