Page 31

Gesturing between them, Selina struggled to keep her composure, the tension evident in her jaw as it shifted beneath her skin.

“This. What is between us. It must stop.”

Grinding his molars, Hugh sucked in a deep breath through his nose.

He had wondered if Selina would say something.

They had both been guilty of the touches and wayward glances over the past week.

Too many times had they found each other’s fingers, winding them together where they could not be seen.

Too many times had he stood just behind her, feeling the weight of her presence, the heat of her body, so near him.

Hugh had never been so addicted to anything the way Selina ensorcelled him.

Worse, it was not only the sensation of her but also the memories of what she felt like as she came apart on his fingers.

It was the sight of her, the sound of her voice, the way her smile made his blood rush through his veins.

Still, it was clear that Selina had come to a firm decision, and Hugh noted a rising nausea that filled him alongside a growing pain beneath his ribs.

He nodded once. “I see.”

But then Selina sagged, the breath rushing out of her as her eyes found the floor. When she looked back up at Hugh again, Selina looked pained, as if something sharp pressed into her chest. There was a glassy shine to her warm brown eyes.

“There is something between us. I understand, Hugh. I do. I know I have not been innocent in this, and I accept that responsibility. I-I want to be near you as well. I will not deny that. But this needs to stop. I am to be wed, and I-I will not be a wife who has a lover behind her husband’s back. I cannot bring myself to allow that.”

Hugh had not thought of the possibility.

The notion that Selina would allow herself to take a lover, let alone him, was preposterous.

He knew that. Chemistry and heat between them were undoubtedly there, but Hugh knew better than to assume anything about it.

He’d felt a connection with others before, and it always ended when they had had their fill of each other.

One night of passion, and they parted ways.

He’d presumed that if Selina ever did allow him inside her, it would be the same.

Except, the thought that he might have her only once, the thought that he might not see how she looked in his bed come morning, actually twisted his stomach, offering a sick sensation that Hugh could staunchly do without.

That was a problem in and of itself.

So, why then do I care if she has concluded that she won’t take a lover? I never expected it to be me, even if she did.

No, he had not expected, believed, or presumed that he would ever be Selina’s lover. Still, a part of him that he had kept buried silently reminded Hugh that he had wanted it, however.

“I have not asked that of you, have I?” The words came out from a place of irritation, and Hugh knew he was operating with his defenses up.

Selina shook her head, taking a step closer to him. “No, you have not. But the fact remains. This fascination must come to an end, and I see no way to end it without serious intervention.”

Something unnameable prickled in the air, and Hugh stiffened, sensing the change. He kept a close eye on Selina’s expression, and while the resolution was there, so too was a growing sense of urgency.

“And do you have a mode of intervention in mind?” Hugh asked, his heart rate beginning to tick up as his skin hummed with latent energy.

It was like this whenever the two of them were in a room together: the need to be close, the way his fingers begged to touch her, and the way every fiber of his being felt drawn to her side.

Hugh’s stare roamed over the creamy skin of Selina’s neck, his attention doubling down on the way her slim garment barely hid her from his eyes.

“I do. I know what we must do.” He cocked a brow, tipping his head to urge Selina to continue. It took her a moment, and he waited, presenting an air of patience even as he did not feel it. “We must get this desire out of our systems.”

Hugh’s stomach dropped as he clenched his muscles. “I’m afraid I shall need you to elaborate on that.”

Selina’s stare dropped to the floor, and a warm pink suffused every inch of visible skin.

She was flushed, immensely so, and Hugh’s length twitched beneath the fabric of his trousers as he admired the look of it on her.

Selina seemed so bashful now, and he recognized this intrigue from the times he’d toyed with her before.

“I believe that once we have engaged in activity with each other, the intensity of the infatuation will fade. Furthermore…” She sucked in a deep breath, and Hugh stood there flabbergasted.

Selina wished to sleep with him? Now? “… I am aware of Magnus’s intentions for our marriage.

It is to be the same as it was with Easton, and…

and I do not wish to live the remainder of my life a virgin. ”

The blood drained from his face as his mouth fell open. He could feel neither his fingers nor toes, and the furious pounding of his heart was a tsunami in his ears. Selina had been plain enough. She wished for him to?—

“Selina, I cannot?—”

“Hugh,” Selina took another step closer, reaching for his hands, “The only time I will be able to experience this is before I wed, and I wish for it to be with you.”

He stole himself back, turning away from Selina and facing his desk.

Hugh’s breaths came hurriedly, and his head swam as if he’d had far more to drink than just his few sips of whiskey.

He could not believe what Selina was saying, and as much as he wanted her— desperately wanted her—he could not allow himself to tarnish her like this.

That was the entire reason he knew that they would never work, why no woman should ever be under his care.

“No, Selina, that is impossible. We?—”

“Why can I not seize agency over my life just this once?” Her voice was thick with emotion, cracking and pleading.

“I have given everything to the service of my family. I have always put my own desires last. Over and over again. I need this, Hugh. I need one moment in my life where I have control, and I want you. It consumes me so. This could be our way through this situation.”

Sighing, Hugh strained his spine. He did not turn toward Selina, however. Instead, he returned to the chair behind his desk, sat down, and faced her with this firm barrier between them.

“I will not ruin your reputation, Selina. I will not go behind your fiancé’s back in this way.”

“Magnus has expressed his feelings regarding a lover. I am free to take one, and he is likely to do the same. I am merely acting now so that we can put this behind us. I am asking for one evening, Hugh. That is all. Unless… unless you do not wish to be with me.”

He sagged in his chair, quiet and pinching his eyes closed. Hugh shook his head. That was not it at all. But before he could say another word, he heard the floorboard creak before him as Selina walked up to him where he sat.

Watching her with rapt fascination, Hugh could scarcely pull his eyes from Selina’s form as she attempted to straddle his lap gracefully. She was not confident in her moves, however, and he could not help but smile at the slight awkwardness that filled her expression. Selina glared back in return.

But that look changed as they met each other’s eyes. Selina gazed up at him from beneath her lashes, her stare lust-lidded and heavy. Her focus flickered down to his lip before returning to his eyes once more.

“ Please , Hugh. I want this. I want you . Now.”

She leaned forward, her slight fingers finding the back of his neck and gently pulling him toward her.

Selina was persistent, shifting up closer to him, her juncture brushing against the aching length that remained concealed behind his trousers.

He groaned, his eyes falling closed, and then Selina’s lips were pressed to his own.

Hugh had kissed Selina before, but each time was like a lightning strike to his soul.

He could feel her in his bones as they connected, their tongues sweeping against each other’s immediately.

They were utterly consumed by the kiss, by the way they fit together so perfectly.

Not a single other time in his life had Hugh felt this bowled over by the act of simply kissing someone.

He could hardly imagine what it would be like to make love to her.

No. No, you cannot.

Abruptly, Hugh lifted Selina from his lap, setting her down on her feet and rushing across the room.

He needed to move, to scream, or to flee into the night, but none of those options were available to him.

Instead, Hugh turned a faced the bookcase to his left, gripping the shelf until his knuckles turned white and ached.

A hand landed gently on his shoulder, and Hugh ground his teeth together, trying to breathe through the way his body craved Selina’s touch.

“Did I… did I do something wrong? I had thought that I?—”

Hugh looked over his shoulder at her, eyeing the way Selina’s lips were red and puffy from their kiss. He was a bad man, a terrible one at that, because the sight made his sex twitch once more, his mind racing with thoughts of finally claiming her.

“Selina, this… this isn’t what you want.” He stared up at the ceiling, forcing himself not to tear Selina’s shift from her lithe form. “It cannot be.”

“It is, though. I have wanted this since the first time I saw you in this study with the Widow.”

The memory made him sick. He had no intention of doing anything with that woman. She was not on his mind or in his heart, and he would not have her in his bed. But Selina…

“I will—Selina, if you do not stop this, there is no controlling how I will claim you.” He dropped his hands from the shelf, facing Selina, who stared up at him with wide, doe eyes.

“I am ravenous for you. Do you understand? I will claim everything you have and more. This is your last chance to leave.”

There was a long pause. Selina looked down to the floor, steadying herself with a deep breath that made the swells of her breasts press against her shift. Her nipples were pebbled buds beneath the fabric, and Hugh’s mouth watered at the thought of sucking one of them between his teeth.

“I do not want to leave.” She met his stare, everything about her both shy and hungry. “I want you, Hugh. Please. Please take me.”

He had tried. He had tried to keep Selina away, to do what he knew a better man would have done, but all that was gone now.

Hugh surged forward, taking Selina by the shoulders and spinning her around until her back was pressed against the bookshelf.

He pinned her there, towering over her as he stared down into her shocked expression.

“Remember that I warned you, Selina.”

And then he crashed his lips down on hers, keeping her pressed to the wood that housed her precious books before maneuvering Selina’s hands above her head and holding them tight in one hand.

Selina had wanted to relinquish her virtue, and Hugh was now going to claim it as his forever more through the evening until the sun was up.