Page 14

CHAPTER 14

Zeb

Today is the day.

I stare at the road, Fall Out Boy’s Dead on Arrival blaring through my speakers.

The hot Arizona air filters through my windows as I try my hardest not to overthink things.

I don’t miss the irony of Patrick Stump telling me this conversation is dead on arrival, but I don’t bother changing the station, because at least the emo station doesn’t play Gravedigger , and I know if I’m going to make it through the next week with the Graves, I need to have as clear a head as possible.

What better way to clear my head than to jam out to my favorite songs, right?

When I get to the Morningstar Hotel, I pull up to the gated parking area like Geo told me to do last night.

There’s a small group of fans collected out front, and I watch as security ushers them around, dispelling them so I can make it through.

The attendant takes one look at me and my red pickup truck and raises an eyebrow, but he just hands me a ticket and says, “To the left. The buses are starting to arrive.”

I flash him my best smile as I pull through the open gate, turning left.

Sure enough, I come to a gigantic lot that is already starting to fill up with other cars, and then I see a bus turn in.

I glance at my clock, noting it’s only ten-fifteen.

I park, but I don’t turn the music off, because honestly, it’s the only thing keeping me from jumping out of my fucking skin right now.

If you would have told me a month ago that I’d be picking Geo Graves up from his hotel and catching up while he was in town, I would not have believed you.

I’m not stupid, and I know this is probably a bad idea, if only because the desire to fall back into old roles is really tempting, but I also feel like maybe, just maybe, I need this.

Katy’s right.

I do need to put myself back out there, but maybe I need to confront my demon first before I do it.

Or, more accurately, the man who altered my fucking DNA.

I tap my fingers along to Dashboard Confessional’s Vindicated , watching as the buses file in.

I get out of the car, leaning against the front of my truck, arms crossed.

I watch them empty, noting who comes out of what bus.

I know I should probably feel star struck, because standing in front of me are some of the biggest acts on the rock scene today.

Felix Hart, Heart Killer , Mateo Starr from Mage Of Mercy .

My jaw tenses.

Up until recently, my Geo Graves detox meant I wasn’t looking him up, but it’s honestly impossible sometimes to avoid news about a celebrity .

And Mateo Starr was always a hot topic on social media, especially since his public break up, and as of late, his whirlwind romance with up-and-coming Heart Killer frontman, Dare Wylde.

I shouldn’t be jealous of the man, I know that, but I can’t help it.

Geo and Mateo’s “bromance” has been documented well enough over the years, and I’ve certainly seen the evidence a time or two, even though I tried to avoid it.

Playing shows together, going out to clubs.

Doing everything I should have been doing with him.

Mateo stops, looking up and catching my gaze.

Dare Wylde jumps out of the bus next to him, pulling his attention, and then I see him.

The last bus unloads, and it’s like time stops.

Geo steps down and onto the pavement, his dark hair blowing in the wind like in those dumb, cheesy romance movies.

He doesn’t see me; instead, he nods at Mateo, and I frown.

Mateo cocks his head, and then Geo turns to look at me, and.

.

.

The smile that forms on his face is absolute perfection and melts all the tension away.

I push off of my car, taking one step, then two, then three.

Geo slides one hand in his pocket while the other pulls a rolling suitcase, his guitar slung over his back, grinning like a damn kid as he picks up his pace, and before I know it he’s in front of me.

“Hey,” he says, pulling me into a tight hug.

I startle for a moment, because I wasn’t expecting a hug.

A handshake, maybe, but a hug.

.

.

My entire body sinks into him like ink into paper, and instinctively, I wrap my arms around him, burying my face in his shoulder.

He smells exactly the same as I remember.

Like orange blossoms and spicy cedar.

Like a core memory.

His fingers grip my shoulder and I feel him relax instantly.

Whoever said hugs are the best medicine, wasn’t fucking kidding.

I break away, if only because I know if I don’t we’ll never make it to my truck, and it’s still running.

“Hey,” I reply, grinning with excitement.

He brushes some dark hair out of his eyes, and I reach for his suitcase.

“Oh, you don’t have to?—”

“Don’t worry about it.” I turn to see Mateo staring at me like I’m a science experiment.

“What’s his problem?” I ask as I stroll toward my car.

“Who? Mateo?” Geo asks.

“Nothing. He just suggested we all should get together and hang out.”

“Who’s we?” I ask as I toss Geo’s luggage in the back bed.

“Like, my friends. You know, the guys... Felix, Duncan, Dare, Hailee, Richie...” He rattles their names off so comfortably.

“You.”

I shoot him a raised eyebrow.

“Your famous friends know about me?”

Geo shrugs.

“Why wouldn’t they? You are my... friend, right?”

I don’t know why that thought or his question bothers me, but it does.

What exactly has he said about me?

I relax slightly.

“Yeah.” I nod, even though I’m not entirely sure friend is the right word.

Sure, once we were friends.

But the word doesn’t feel like it fits now, though I’m not sure what I’d really define us as.

“Of course we’re friends.” I smile.

“No reason, I guess,” I say as I open the door for him.

His amber eyes glance up at me, and I realize I’m actually a little taller than him now.

Not by much, but it’s noticeable.

Ten years ago, I looked up at him.

“Thanks,” he says as he climbs in the passenger side, and I don’t miss the way his shirt slides up his sides, showing off those dark, black lines of ink that dip below his waistband.

I pretend I don’t notice, but my cock definitely notices.

When I get to the driver’s side, I notice he’s staring at me.

“What?” I ask as I climb into my seat and turn the key, the vehicle roaring to life and then settling into a deep rumble.

Geo pulls some shades out from his front pocket of his burgundy shirt.

“You just... you look good, Z,” he says casually.

“Different, but good.”

I watch as he puts them on, the way the sun glints off of the silver arms.

I don’t know what to say, so I say nothing.

I drive us back through the gate, handing my pass to the attendant, who once again raises his eyebrow but says nothing.

I let out a breath that the group of fans seems to have dispersed, and it doesn’t take us long to get back on the road.

“Hope your drive wasn’t too bad,” he says, leaning back in my passenger seat.

His spicy citrus-woodsy scent fills my car and I have to fight the desire to sigh.

“Not at all,” I reply, shooting him a genuine smile.

The beginning chords of Boys Like Girl’s Great Escape fill the space as I lean my arm out the window.

Geo does the same.

“Oh, shit, I’m sorry, you can change if it you want,” I say, noticing how he is glancing at the radio.

“Driver picks the music, remember?” he says with a smirk.

“Besides, I haven’t heard these guys in forever.” He’s tapping his fingers against the edge of the windowsill, keeping time with the beats of the song.

And then he sings, and I feel like I really am nineteen again.

He belts out those high notes, crooning on about making a great escape, and I don’t even think about singing along with him, like we used to.

Geo starts to bounce a bit, the rhythm alive in his voice and in the space between us.

His energy is contagious.

And before I know it, we’re both singing at the top of our fucking lungs to every song that comes on the whole way home.

When we finally get back to my place, my face hurts from smiling so damn much.

Maybe this won’t be so bad after all.

I grab his luggage from the car.

He stands on my sidewalk, his pale arms contrasting the black tank he’s wearing.

I come up next to him, noticing the way he looks at my house, and I feel a sense of pride.

“I know it’s no Morningstar, but there’s WiFi,” I tease.

Geo glances at me.

“It’s perfect, Z. It’s you.”

“Okay, so I’ll give you the quick tour, and then we can grab lunch? Or if you just want to hang out, rest, we can?—”

“Lunch is good.” Geo nods, slowly sauntering over to my kitchen island.

I freeze, watching the way the light from the kitchen shines through the windows, hitting the suncatchers that bathe him in rainbows and sparkles.

It’s hard to believe the man in front of me is the same person I fell in love with ten years ago.

But that spark that refuses to listen beckons to my foolish heart.

“So yeah, kitchen—” I twirl around my small kitchen, then point to the left.

“Living room, sun room?—”

I motion for him to follow me down the hall, and he doesn’t hesitate.

“Bathroom, my bedroom—” I say the words quickly, dragging his luggage to the last room, across from my mine.

“Guest room slash music room. Figured you’d probably like this better than the couch.” I mumble the last bit, feeling an influx of sudden warmth.

I drop his luggage off in the doorway of the guestroom.

He slides up to the doorframe, peeking in.

He braces his arms on both sides, the motion drawing attention to the prominent muscles in his broad shoulders and back.

The definition looks good on him.

“It’s nice. Cozy,” he says, walking into the room.

I slide my hands in my pockets, adjusting my stupid cock.

My phone is chirping away as it vibrates in my back pocket.

I know it’s Katy, but I don’t have the wherewithal to text her right now.

I just want to hold on to this moment, watching Geo in my house a little longer before everything goes up in flames.

Because I know as soon the Graves family enters the chat, shit’s going to hit the fan.

Geo jumps on the bed, his head hitting the pillows.

He spreads his arms out along both sides, moaning out a sigh of relief.

“Oh, this is nice...” he says, closing his eyes.

I enter the room slowly, leaning against the dresser.

“If you’d rather rest, you can?—”

Geo leans up on his elbows, and the sight of him here, like this—dark hair falling in his eyes, positioned the way he is—I know I need to keep my distance.

“I’ll sleep when I’m dead,” he says as he pushes himself up.

He casually strolls over to where I’m standing, leaning one arm out to brace himself against the dresser.

His dark gaze catches mine and I have to focus on breathing .

This is really happening.

Geo’s in my fucking house.

My phone rings and Geo gaze’s flashes to my side.

“You going to get that?”

“It can wait,” I say with a shrug.

Geo’s phone rings, and I can’t help but roll my eyes as the text messages chirp one after the other in rapid succession.

“You going to get that?” I ask.

I watch as he silences his phone, a grin forming on my face.

“Nope. It can wait.” He smirks.

I nod.

“Okay, then. I’m starving, how about you?”