Page 24 of Giving Him Something He Can Feel

When we reached my spot, we sort of went our separate ways.

Her cooking in the kitchen while I went to my office to think.

I knew we needed to have a conversation, but I didn’t know how that shit would go.

Hell I didn’t know if I wanted to be straight up with her or keep shit vague.

Ultimately it came down to me wondering if I wanted to protect her from the real me and lie or if I was going to be straight up and watch her view of me change.

I spent so much time cooped up in my office that daylight had escaped and the aroma of food filled the darkness that surrounded me.

Standing from the sofa in the office, I stretched a little before I opened the door to exit.

The living room and foyer were dark, because neither of us had turned the lights on.

I entered the kitchen, eyes trained on the back of her head as she moved around the kitchen.

The space fit her like she was made for it. Like it was made for her.

She turned around, placing a plate on the counter, before looking up at me.

She still had that same look in her eyes.

The one that let me know what Archie said had gotten to her.

Niggas could’ve skated around it, but I didn’t want to.

Oddly enough I felt the need to be transparent with her as if it couldn’t hurt me in the long end.

“You wanna talk about it?” The words spilled from my lips on a bitch type vibe. Since when was I the one who wanted to talk or even discuss something? When it came to her.

“About what? I was just coming to get you to eat.” Her expression was blank.

“I know you heard what he said. I know you probably wanna know.”

“I did, but I don?—”

“I did. I killed her.” I’ve never admitted this shit to a soul, not even my own little sister when she heard the news. For some reason though, I had to admit it to Virtue. What I felt for her wouldn’t let me say the right things to brush this under the rug.

She blinked a few times, stunned at my honesty. “Wha—What?”

“I met and fell in love with Mia quick as fuck. Thought that shit was love at first sight, but I was so mistaken. For her I was a career maker; a way to move up. Detective Archie was not only her handler, but also the nigga she was fucking behind my back and in my bed. She used me for everything she could get outa me. I was with that woman for four years and she only slipped once. Had she not I would’ve been served to the feds on a silver platter by her hand.

I’m not saying all of this for you to feel bad for me or none of that shit, because at the end of the day I made a decision.

One that I’d make a million times over, because betrayal is betrayal and that shit is punishable by death in my book. ”

I rounded the corner, stepping into her space. “Speak, Peach.” She had been too quiet, and that shit was lowkey killing me.

“What am I supposed to say?”

“That you don?—”

“When I got with you I didn’t think you were a saint, hell I didn’t expect you to be. Now I didn’t expect you to have killed your wife, but in some weird way I understand.” She looked up at me with the sincerest of eyes.

I was taken aback one hundred percent by her response. “You don’t have to say that. You can feel how you feel.”

“It was you or her, and you chose yourself. Does the fact that I don?—”

I interrupted her sentence picking her up and sitting her on the counter. Eyes locked and bodies in contact.

“You mean that shit?” each word I spoke made contact with her lips.

She nodded. “Why wouldn’t I?”

Cartier

Tensions between Ace and Mafia were at an all-time high and a war was imminent.

Alias taking shots at Fat Trell and Fari started it.

Then, my brother retaliating and making sure they couldn’t make money added fuel to an already lit fire.

I heard Mafia didn’t lose anybody to that fire, shit no one had lost anyone yet, but I knew it was coming.

Niggas wasn’t about to keep sending shots and missing.

Hell had the bullet been five centimeters to the left Fari would have been gone.

He wasn’t though, he was still here and that alone should’ve had that nigga Aylo putting his brother into some type of hiding.

With Fari back on his feet, that was something niggas should have worried about.

Though he was affiliated to Ace, he didn’t need us.

That nigga was a one man army and came at shit as such.

“It’s crazy to keep beefing with these lil’ niggas like they’re somebody. Niggas ain’t shit but roosters in counterfeit Patek’s and all-white.” Cruz drank from his glass looking from me to my brother.

I chuckled. “Niggas won’t be standing for too long. You know how that goes.”

He laughed. “Where his ass at anyway?”

“Probably stalking them nigga’s mama.”

We all shared a laugh, at the same time as the door opened.

When I looked up, my eyes landed on a popular ghost himself.

Aysun was the only nigga I knew who stayed low in the trenches but didn’t have to.

He claimed it was because he liked to see his money be made.

I didn’t get it, but I respected it. I respected his moves and his hustle.

“Y’all niggas sitting in here looking like straight up marks. The fuck is up?” He looked around, before taking a seat.

“Shit. Tryna see where yo’ ass been.” Trek looked at him.

“Out here livin’. I’m young and ‘bout my paper.”

“I see. Yo’ count be good.”

He nodded. “What’s up with y’all and that Aylo nigga?”

“Nothing too deep, I know he looking to retaliate, but don’t know shit about beefing with niggas.” Cruz laughed.

Trek shook his head. “We ain’t gonna touch ‘em yet. We touch his money, but that bullet touched Fari.”

“Oh damn. The brother shot Fari, right?” Aysun asked.

I nodded. “Don’t mean they ain’t gonna both feel that shit. Fari moves on his own resonance. I’m shock?—”

A face standing in the doorway halted my words.

“Boss, word just came through. They found that nigga Alias hanging from the light pole on Mafia territory.” After a few seconds Cody walked away leaving us in the small office to confer.

Fari’s retaliation would ultimately be taken as a transgression by us.

He was his own entity, but Aylo’s need to show the streets who he thought he was would drive him to do some stupid shit.

The type of shit that would land him as well in a casket before the month was out .

“Ain’t like y’all ain’t know that shit would happen.” Cartrek shrugged, pulling his phone from his pocket. Within a few seconds he had it to his ear.

“Where you at?” A moment later a smile creased his lips, which let me know who he was talking to. Peach. He spoke with her for a while longer before he ultimately hung up and focused back on the conversation at hand.

“So, we don’t move on a nigga unless he moves on us?” Aysun asked with a questioning glare.

“Or if you got it and you’re up for it take the shot. Don’t put that word out to the lil’ niggas though. Be just our luck they do some reckless shit and shoot up a crowd.”

Just that easy word for Aylo’s life was dangling and in the hands of the four of us. Funny thing is we all knew Aysun would be the one to take it, because though he was the youngest he’d make an executive decision in a minute. Blood was non-confrontational but would vent a niggas skull in a minute.

“But on another note, how you get stabbed in the middle of Thirteen’s joint?” Aysun’s eyes were on mine, and now so were my brother’s.

I shook my head. “Bitch caught me off guard. I’m reaching for my food and she’s driving a fucking steak knife through my shoulder.” Shit pissed me off just thinking about it.

“And she still walking around here?”

“For now. My baby mama wanted to touch her, but I can’t even let that shit rock. She’s carrying the future.”

He nodded. “I know a few bitches off the block that’ll handle that for you.”

I nodded. “Right now?”

“Hell yeah, hos just be itching to fight.”

“Bet.”

“Y’all niggas be reckless as fuck together. Don’t be on no mess,” Cruz started. He loved to lecture, but before he laid low was the most reckless of us all.

Sun shook his head. “What, you wanna hold my balls for me nigga?”

We kicked it for a while longer, talking shit before it was time to handle business.

I was ready to be in my baby mama’s face because I hadn’t seen her since I left her sleep this morning.

Jovie was a heavy sleeper, hell the type to wanna fight a nigga if I woke her up so I just kissed her forehead and left a few bucks on the nightstand for her since I knew she was going to get her nails, toes and shit taken care of today.

We left the mattress store a few minutes later, me hopping in the ride with him. “I know I be on some missing shit, but you wanna tell me how you went out here and made a baby?” He turned his loud ass music down and glanced in my direction briefly.

“Man, I fucked one time. Got to know her and knew I couldn’t let her slip through. Course she kept me on bone for a while ‘cause I fucked her girl bu?—”

“You done fell yo’ goofy ass in love.”

I laughed at his teasing. “Swear I didn’t see this shit coming, but Jovie got a nigga in the stuck field.”

“I’m happy for you, but on me it couldn’t be me. I’m not looking for shit past some head. These females are trifling and disloyal as fuck. Think I wanna lay-up and trust a bitch when she could be holding the knife to stab a nigga in the back?”

“Not all of ‘em like that though. Nigga Trek took one of the biggest L’s of ‘em all but look at ‘em. Giving that shit a chance again.”

“Yeah, I heard about that. Fari’s sister. I seen her before, shorty look good than a motherfucker.”

I chuckled. “Don’t let that nigga hear you say that.”