Page 15 of Giving Him Something He Can Feel

I was so busy watching her little bowlegs that I didn’t feel Cartrek in my space, until his lips were against my neck and a hand squeezing my ass.

He definitely brought dick.

“How was work?” his question filled the kitchen. Though I couldn’t see him, I know he was clearing off the table from our dinner.

“I didn’t do much there today. I just went in and printed my quarterly reports. You?”

“Long ass day. Nigga needed a moment to just be.” He placed a few plates in the dishwasher, before reaching to close it.

I nodded. “I get that some days are just exhausting.”

“As fuck, but somehow when I come here with y’all…” His sentence trailed off. Something he normally did when he was biting back his words, looking for the right thing to say so he doesn’t come off as too open.

“You get a lil’ boost. I get it, you use us for our energy.”

He chuckled. “Among other things.” Within seconds he was behind me, dick stabbing me in the lower back while his hand rested on my side.

“Good, We got a mutual agreement.”

His lips found my neck and within seconds I was forced against the sink. “A mutual agreement, huh?” another peck behind my ear.

“Yep.”

In one swift motion he’d turned me around and put me up on the edge of the sink stepping between my legs.

We kissed for what felt like a brief forever before he picked me up and carried me off to my bedroom. He was sure to stop at Adorie’s door to look in on her before we continued to my bedroom.

He placed me on the floor in front of my bed, before stepping back. “You still seeing that nigga?”

“You still getting head in cars?”

He continued to pull his shirt off his body. “You just gon’ keep playing with fire ‘til you got somebody blood on your hands.”

“How? Unlike this thing where you pop up, fuck me, and go about your business, he actually takes me out. And before you ask, I’m not fucking him.”

“You want dates, Peach?” he asked while continuing to come out of his clothes.

Stupidly I nodded. “Look, I know we are?—”

“I ain’t just fucking and ducking you, Peach. I be busy.”

“Sure, so busy that when I wake up in the morning you be gone.” I immediately regretted the words as they escaped my lips. Scorned and all.

Before I knew it he was in my face, looking at me with an expression that I couldn’t read. One that I knew for sure was the opposite of my emotion-filled confession.

“Maybe we need to cool off. I’m not equipped for this. ” I don’t know what I was saying, but I felt like I needed to say it. I felt like I needed to run while I was ahead instead of getting my ass caught up in the mix with an emotionally unavailable man like him.

“You want me to leave?” His question hit me like somebody was stoning me. Mouth dry as hell and emotions at an all-time high.

“No, but I think it’s best if you did.”

He nodded, and before I knew it he was retracing his steps. Redressing to leave at night instead of in the morning while I slept.

He was gone less than twenty minutes later and I was left wondering if I made the right decision, because technically my feelings were my problem. Not his.

After he was gone I lay in my bed questioning myself wondering if I had done right in sending him home, but I had to right? It was necessary. That is what I told myself up until my phone started ringing.

When I glanced down to see who it was, of course it wasn’t him. It was Aylo, requesting to FaceTime like always.

“Yesss..” I sang into the phone.

“See, I knew you could hit them high notes, but you be playing.” He was lying against deep blue sheets with a DIOR printed du-rag on his head.

“I cannot. I was ju?—”

“Naw naw don’t try to downplay it now. You can blow, Mama.”

I laughed at his silly ass. “Yeah whatever, I’ma let you keep thinking that. Why are you in so early? Usually you’re out running the streets.”

He chuckled. “Damn that’s cold. A brother can’t just be tired?”

“So, you’re tired?”

“As hell.” He shook his head. “Plus I wanted to talk to you. Niggas know for a fact if they don’t call you at a certain time you won’t answer the line. Be knocked the fuck out.”

I laughed, because though he was right mostly I also didn’t answer the phone because some of the time he did call my ass was laid up next to Cartrek and I wasn’t dumb enough to answer the damn phone no matter how unserious things with he and I were.

Jovie

I had a doctor’s appointment early this morning, one that confirmed that I was indeed carrying this crazy man’s baby.

While I surly looked upside his head, he had the biggest smile on his face.

A smile so damn big that his teeth were threatening to break out of his mouth.

So I kind of came to the conclusion on my own at home, having a doctor confirm it made this so much more real.

He had really trapped me, and I was really going to have his baby.

This was probably the most unorthodox situation I had ever been in.

His smile in the doctor’s office was ingrained in my brain because he was so happy and I didn’t really know how to feel.

I mean yes I felt this thing between us, but things were moving in a way I wasn’t used to.

Shit I wasn’t the relationship type, and he knew that because he wasn’t either.

As a matter of fact we talked about this that night.

The night that started this whole thing.

When I climbed into this man’s car the last thing I expected was for us to end up in a hotel at two in the morning.

Wasn’t one of those trashy joints either, it was nice but not the one I was supposed to be in while I was here.

Our girls trip to Miami had gone nothing like planned.

Tay had hooked up with some nigga from the club, while Gema had ditched us for Cruz.

That left me with Tasha who didn’t know how to party and this nigga, Cartier.

Wasn’t anything wrong with Cartier, shit if anything he was too fine and easy on the eyes.

Type of nigga you just knew brought his own set of issues and had whole bunches of bitches following up behind him to get chose. Hood rich niggas had it like that.

“You good over there, Jovie? Yeen finna bust out the door and run off on me are you?”

I giggled, broken from my mental tangent for the first time since we walked in the room giving him a thorough look. He’d shed his shirt since I last gave him a look, now showcasing the swamp of tattoos that loitered his beautiful body. “No.”

“Good.” He was in my face seconds later pulling me against him before he picked me up and carried me into the bedroom of the suite.

Like magnets my legs locked around his waist loving the feel of his face in my neck.

I was wasted as fuck, because I knew this shouldn’t have been happening, but I couldn’t stop it.

I couldn’t free the words from my brain because I wanted it, I wanted to break my celibacy for him, for this moment right here.

Seconds later my back was flushed against the cool hotel goose down, while he gripped my body at the edge of the bed. Hands locked on my ankles forcefully moving my body to where he wanted me.

“Fuck,” he murmured just before licking his full lips.

That was when he first made contact, his heavy index finger tracing the outline of my pussy while his middle finger occasionally traveled deeper.

“I wanna taste it first, you gonna let me?” his eyes bore into mine, daring me to deny him.

“Nn...noo,” I stammered, now sitting up on my elbows with the desire to watch him do just that.

Him tightening his grip around my hand grounded me, bringing me back to the present. Now mentally back in the car with him, I gazed over at him with a knowing smirk. “We have just never used condoms. Not the first time and damn sure not now.”

He laughed. “First time we were both fucked up, not thinking ‘bout it. Then after that, shit was a conscious effort.”

“A conscious effort, Cartier?”

“Yep. I wanted you, and you acted like you couldn’t get over some shit that didn’t matter. Now we stuck together, least for the next eighteen.”

“What if I was a fucked up female and you just made a whole baby with me. What if I’m the wors?—”

“You ain’t.”

“But how do you know that, Cartier?” I asked attempting to emphasize my point. “You made a baby with me because you liked the se?—”

“I been stalking yo’ mean ass for years, Jo.

Plotting, tryna get to know you and peeping err’time you turn niggas down.

You think that night was some fly by the way shit?

Well it wasn’t that night I was drunk enough to go for what I wanted instead of watching you from a fer like I been doing.

I ain’t no scary nigga by any means, but the idea of something real with you scared the fuck out of me.

One look at you let me know that you wasn’t shit like err’body else, that I was gonna feel you and be fucking stuck ‘cause that’s how you had me when I first met you. When Gema first introduced you to me.”

I blinked a few times just looking at him, mentally attempting to travel all the way back. It wasn’t possible was it? He had to be bullshitting me, because that would mean I had been oblivious to this with him way longer than before. “Are you serious?”

“Shit had just popped off with Trek, and I wasn’t looking for shit serious but I wanted you. I just knew I wasn’t in the best headspace and I was gonna fuck it up, so I never stepped to you. Kept it cool.”

I nodded. “That night I broke my vow of celibacy with you.”

He smiled. “I know.”

I turned my head in his direction taken aback. “Those bitches were feeding you my business like ninety going north, huh?”

He chuckled. “Makes you feel any better, I didn’t ask about none of it. Motherfuckers knew I wanted you. Only person who didn’t know was you.”