Page 70 of Forgive Me, Father
But if it was what Alfonso needed, I would try.It was one thing my mother made sure I knew how to do: fulfill my duties.It was in his contract, too.
I guess time was the only thing I could give him now until he was ready to give me his answer.
TWENTY-FOUR
THE LITTLE RUNAWAY
I hadn't seenAlfonso all day, and a knot of anxiety twisted in my chest.A small, haunting thought kept clawing at my mind, had he gone back to Sarah?
But Nico was still here, and I overheard him mention that they went diving for crawfish.
When he and Bas came back, he didn’t acknowledge me.
He roamed around the yacht like a ghost.The silence between us remained unbearable.
Alfonso was distant, locked in his broody silence, and every fiber of my being ached for him.
When he passed me without so much as a glance, a sharp pang of regret pierced my heart.I wish I could take back everything I had said.But I wasn’t going to make it, knowing that he took other women to soothe a sexual need that kept his darkness at bay.
I wasn’t that type.
Around five, I took a shower and got dressed for dinner.I pulled on a summer dress over another bikini and put on my make-up, blow-dried my hair, and placed it in a beautiful ponytail.
I found him, Nico, and Bas around a table set for four.There was no sign of any other guests.Just us four.
They all stood up from their chairs as I reached the table and I sat down next to Alfonso.
The air between us was still electrifying.I just wanted to touch him.I want us to be okay.But I doubted either of us would budge.
We dished up the crawfish and a few minutes later, Nico and Bas created a fun vibe by speaking about stupid random shit.
I was grateful for them.
After dinner, I was stuffed.
“You want to have a nightcap with me and watch the stars?”Alfonso asked.
“I’d love to.”I smiled, watching as the faintest curve tugged at the corner of his lips.But it wasn’t a true smile, it didn’t reach his eyes, and that hurt more than I expected.
He poured me a glass of sweet wine, then his usual whiskey, and we made our way to the front deck.The soft daybed in the middle of the space beckoned, and we both stretched out on it, letting the quiet of the night wrap around us.The stars above were brilliant, twinkling like diamonds scattered across velvet, and the sound of the waves was just distant enough to be soothing.I let myself relax for a moment, losing myself in the stillness of the night, but something in the air between us felt off, as if the silence was too heavy to bear.
I took a sip of my sweet drink, and it was magic on my tongue.
Alfonso was too quiet for my taste, and I wished I could just pull him out of it.
“I don’t want you to fear me or hate me.”
“I don’t fear you.A fearforyou, Alfonso.You have a dark side, and I guess it gets darker the longer you try to hold on.”
He nodded.
“Tell me the truth.How many times in a month do you need to visit the dungeon?”
He froze.
“That was where you were?”
“Yes, but I also had to come and kill the fire that our wedding caused.It wasn’t just that.Hurting you was a sign that I needed to put my darkness back in the box.”
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