Page 21 of Fierce-Jax (Fierce Matchmaking #18)

FEEL SO GOOD ABOUT MYSELF

“ Y our boyfriend spent the night I see,” her father said the minute she walked into her parents’ backdoor.

Dillion looked around like a deer in the headlights with a tractor-trailer bearing down on her to see if her daughter was anywhere within hearing.

“Where’s Gianna?”

It was ten, and Jax had left about thirty minutes ago. Plenty enough time for them to eat breakfast, race to her room and fling their clothes off fast, then clean the kitchen, her kissing him full of more to come as he walked out her door.

“She’s playing with your mother in the front room,” her father said.

“To keep her away so I could get a lecture?” she asked, lifting her chin. “I’m thirty-three years old and have a four-year-old daughter. I’m not a virgin, Dad.”

Dylan closed one eye at her, the frown not leaving his face. If anything, it only got deeper. “Don’t remind me.”

She laughed and walked over to pat his cheek.

She felt too light and happy this morning for anything to get her down. “Be happy for me,” she said. “Jax is a great guy.”

“So your mother has reminded me by the way you’ve been acting. I think you’ve been avoiding me though.”

“As if you’d let me avoid you for long,” she said. “I know it was your idea to put pressure on Mom for me to pick Gianna up this morning.”

Her father snorted. “It got you here. What’s wrong with me wanting to see with my own eyes if my daughter is okay?”

“Nothing,” she said. “As you can tell I’m doing great. Dad, I appreciate the concern. I do. Jax is not Alec.”

“Thank God for that,” Dylan said. “But I’ll be the judge.”

“Judge all you want when you get to meet him. They have completely distinct personalities. They are nothing alike. He’s sweet and nice and...just makes me feel so good about myself. I can’t even put it into words. Can’t that be enough for now?”

“Yes,” her mother said, coming into the room. “It can be. You’re absolutely glowing on top of it.”

“I’m leaving,” her father said. “I can’t be in here if you talk like that.”

She laughed when her father exited the room to go toward the front of the house. He was either going to his office or to see Gianna.

“What’s Gianna doing?” she asked.

“Watching a movie,” her mother said. “That should give us about ten minutes before she comes looking for me and knows you’re here.”

“You didn’t tell her I was on the way?”

“And give up a chance to see how your night went?” her mother asked. “No way. Coffee?”

“Sure,” she said. “I could use another.”

Her mother turned to get a few cups down and Dillion got the creamer out of the fridge.

“I wasn’t lying when I said you were glowing. I take it it went well.”

She walked to the hallway to make sure her father wasn’t within hearing distance. Her parents' house was bigger than hers and only one story so that made everything spread out much more.

“I swear it was the best night of my life. Once we got it out of our system, then he was so calculated.”

“What?” her mother asked. “That doesn’t sound good.”

“Oh,” she said, “it was. It’s as if he’s a fast learner and took mental notes of what I liked and then he expanded on them. I don’t know if I’ve ever been with a man that knew my body so well.”

She closed her eyes and tried to picture it in her head again, her body all but feeling ghost tingles from the night before.

From an hour ago.

“Good for you,” her mother said. “I don’t know that I’ve ever seen you so relaxed. So at peace and sure of yourself on top of it. I never did with Alec, that is for sure.”

She sighed. “Mom. Life was different with Alec. I was doing my residency, he was an ER doctor. We had very little time on our hands and demanding careers we were both starting, then add an unplanned child to it.”

“I understand,” her mother said. “And we know how well he managed that.”

“Mom,” she said. “Don’t go there. I don’t need any reminders of what happened. Of what life was like. I would have never wished harm to him and you know that.”

“I’m sorry,” her mother said. “Dillion. He lied to you. Everything was a lie and you didn’t know it.”

She put her hands over her ears like Gianna did when she didn’t want to be told to get to bed. “I can’t hear you. Because you know, that would pour rain over my happy sunny day. You wouldn’t want to do that, would you?”

“No,” her mother said. “And my granddaughter did that same move last night for ten minutes before I could get her in bed. Wonder where she learned it.”

She laughed and removed her hands. “Not me. I’ve never done it in front of her before.”

Dillion couldn’t remember ever doing it as an adult. Maybe as a teen was the last time.

Which of course only made it funnier to her when she saw Gianna doing it.

At least her daughter seemed to take after her more than her father.

Definitely a good thing.

But even though Alec’s high intellect got him through med school and made him a good doctor, some of his negative characteristics came out too often in their daughter and Dillion had to address them as best as she could.

Her mother handed her a cup of brewed coffee and she poured the creamer in.

“When do we get to meet Jax?” her mother asked. “Your father is going to be pestering me. He knows enough not to pester you. You two have gotten along much better in the past few years and we don’t need those fights again.”

She rolled her eyes. “I’m mature enough to know that Dad always meant well even if his approach was more drastic and controlling than I appreciated.”

“Because he told you all along that Alec wasn’t right for you. That something felt off.”

“Dad said that because Alec had no relationship with his parents. That he hadn’t talked to them in over ten years.”

“And that is a sign,” her mother argued. “As much as people might not be close to their parents, they still have some communication. Alec cut his parents out of his life. People don’t do that without a reason.”

“I know the reason,” she said. “I told you it. He said they abused him. Verbally and his father even was physical. His mother turned a blind eye. He made something of himself despite that and never looked back. I don’t know why you couldn’t appreciate that fact.”

It was one thing she admired about Alec.

Too bad her mother was right, and he lied about so much. Or had secrets.

He didn’t handle things as well as he always let on and she was too caught up in her own life to pay much attention to things in front of her face.

She didn’t have that worry with Jax though.

Not in the least.

What you saw was what you got.

Besides, the Fierces would have never picked him out for her if they didn’t think he was an upstanding citizen.

She’d take that any day over what she’d learned about with Alec.

“I think it’s wonderful that Alec became a doctor despite everything he went through in his life. If his parents even knew that about him. You said they didn’t come to the funeral. Do they even know about Gianna? You’ve never said.”

“I’ve had no way to reach them and don’t even know their names,” she admitted.

“Dillion Marie!” her mother snapped. “You never said that to me. Ever. What if he lied about his parents and they do not know that he died? That they are hoping for a reunion. Or that they’ve got a grandchild they know nothing about?”

It’d weighed on her mind for years.

“Gianna is mine,” she said. “I believe the things Alec told me about his father. If he wanted them to know he had a child, he could have done it at any point when I was pregnant and didn’t. Alec might have been deceptive about a lot of things, but he had a troubled childhood. I know it. Trust me.”

“But you didn’t trust Alec,” her mother said. “So how can you trust what he said?”

“Because I refuse to believe everything we had was a complete lie,” she argued.

“Did we have a solid relationship? No. Do I think we would have lasted if he hadn’t died?

Absolutely not. I would have never condoned what he’d done and didn’t want any part of it.

Very few know and it’s better that way. But I lived with him.

I saw him when he talked about his childhood. It wasn’t good.”

She didn’t need to explain anymore and she wouldn’t.

She was tired of defending the father of her daughter. They’d meant a great deal to each other early on. She wouldn’t forget those times even if she didn’t think she could forgive him for what he’d done.

“Mom,” Gianna said, running into the room. Perfect timing. “I didn’t know you were here.”

“I just got here a few minutes ago,” she said, picking her daughter up for a hug. She’d never grow tired of this. “I was having coffee with Grandma. How was your night?”

“It was so much fun,” Gianna said. “And since I could only bring some of my stuffed animals, I’ve got to bring the others next weekend. Grandma told me I could and we have next Saturday all planned out.”

“You’re welcome,” her mother said, lifting an eyebrow.