Page 46

“You lost someone,” she says, and that statement hits me like a punch. Images of Louis and Leo pop up in my head, of their last moments in life. Of the blood, the pain, the emptiness in Leo’s eyes.

I swallow.

The happiness from moments before is instantly replaced by something darker, oozing like a wound never allowed to heal and festering with all the missed chances and unspoken words.

Ara’s hand lands on my arm, a comfort, sunshine in the vortex of darkness that threatens to swallow me. Her touch grounds me and pulls me back into the here and now, away from the abyss of grief and rage.

“The only way to honor the dead is by living,” she whispers. The words reverberate inside my chest like I’ve heard them before but forgot.

“It’s what my father used to say.” She smiles at me sadly.

“So… that is what I’m trying to do… to honor him.

” Her breath hitches, and she looks out into the dark.

“It’s funny really how others gained a hero while I lost mine.

” Her voice breaks, and she bites her lip, her breath slow and deep, like she’s breathing away her pain.

And I feel it, feel the pain in my chest lessen marginally while I breathe in rhythm with her.

“When you held the eulogy after the attack…I knew then,” she says, squeezing my arm before dropping her hand. I instantly miss her touch.

“I’m so, so sorry, Daddy…I hope you know that.” She whispers so softly that I would have missed it if not for my connection to the air around us. “I’ll make sure they are safe.” I know those words weren’t for me, but I can’t help but wonder what she means by that.

My chest is a mangled mess of feelings, and I couldn’t have talked even if I tried. Instead, I cover her hand with mine, where it rests on the stone between us, and I hope she understands.

We sit like that for a while until Ara extracts her hand and runs her fingers over the back of mine.

A soft caress I feel in my soul. Her fingers are so light against my marked skin.

She looks up at me with a sad smile before she leans in and brushes her lips over my cheek. I freeze, afraid to spook her.

“Good night, Tate.” She jumps up and hurries off while I still savor the feeling of her lips on my skin and the sound of my name rolling off her tongue.

I’m stunned, rattled, and awed but also slightly less broken than before. Like Ara started to push the shattered pieces of my soul back together.

Never in a thousand lives would I have guessed that the same pain and regret lurked beneath Ara’s sunny surface, that she would understand so completely without me having to say a word.

Ara is the only one at the breakfast table when I enter the dining hall the following morning.

“Good morning, sunshine,” I murmur while dropping into the seat next to her. I relax when she smiles at me instead of shutting me out.

“Sunshine?” she asks.

“Your mood, your name.” I shrug. “It fits.”

“What fits?” Jared plops down next to me.

Ara and I share a smile.

“Finally,” he sighs. “The tension between you was giving me anxiety just by watching,” he whispers even though no one else is in the room yet.

“Why are you always up so early?” I ask Ara one of the questions that bugged me since before I knew her name.

“I hate braiding up my hair while it’s wet,” she confesses.

“Maybe you should date someone with air magic who could help you out with that,” Jared suggests innocently, and I kick him under the table.

“Ouch, what was that for?” he complains while Ara giggles.

I glare at him. While we talked, I’m still not sure if my questions or the almost-kiss had her avoiding me for the past two days.

And I will not risk pushing her away because my best friend thinks he’s funny.

The next days are like a quiet dance between us, both of us unsure of the steps.

We’re back at the academy, which means we have to be careful of watchful eyes, and Ara is back with her squadron.

Janus released her from punishment after we got back.

He didn’t have much choice since Tanner and I reported excellent behavior.

It’s good for her, but fuck, I miss having her around.

Since she has classes and I’m on patrols, we often don’t exchange more than a glance or superficial chitchat when we pass in the hallway.

I catch her watching me during strategy meetings, when we are both in the sparring hall, or during lunch, and my eyes sure as hell find her whenever she’s around.

Today, all riders from our division had a drill up in the mountains to practice handling large-scale operations. It made us late for lunch, so I haven’t had a chance to see her yet.

I’m sitting opposite Jared, both of us quietly digging in, when her scent hits me.

“Why don’t you like cake and cookies?” Ara’s voice is teasing, and I find her standing behind me when I turn around.

She holds a plate of cake, placing a big piece into her mouth, her teeth trapping the fork while she grins around it.

She lets the fork glide out against her soft lips while holding my gaze, then moves right back to the cake for another piece.

I swallow.

“Sugar is not part of a healthy diet,” I answer. I wouldn’t have anything against the sugar clinging to her upper lip right now, though. Her tongue darts out, cleaning it off, and I nearly groan.

Fuck. Focus on something besides her mouth.

“Really, not tempted at all?” she asks, and I narrow my eyes at her. That has to be on purpose. But the look she gives me is pure innocence, like she just continues our game of simple questions.

“Nope.” Liar.

I hear Jared choke behind me. His coughing is accompanied by the sound of a hand pounding his back. She smiles like she knows I’m full of shit.

“I, for my part, like to live dangerously,” Ara says.

“Don’t I know it,” I mutter, replaying the encounter with a certain dragon in my mind. Another piece of cake disappears into her mouth. Yes, I’m definitely tempted.

“ Come on. What is your favorite cake?” she inquires. “There has to be one you would make an exception for.”

I don’t think anyone has ever asked me such an innocent and, at the same time, loaded question before.

A smile tugs at the corners of my mouth. She is something.

“Chocolate cake,” I answer. It was my choice for every birthday back home.

“Good one. Fits you,” she declares, nodding.

I blink. How can a choice of cake be fitting? She laughs at my face and leans in until her breath tickles my ear.

“Dark, tempting, delicious, and much sweeter than anticipated.” She sends me a devilish smile before she turns and vanishes in the group of runners at the buffet. Heat surges through my body, making my skin sing and turning my thoughts into mush. I shake my head, trying to clear it.

Holy shit. How did she manage to turn me on by comparing me to cake?

When I tear my gaze from the spot where she just vanished, my eyes meet a smirking Jared.

“What?” I ask.

“I would pay dearly to know what Summer whispered in your ear,” he says. I scowl at him. I will not repeat that. The bastard throws his head back and laughs.