Page 11 of Falling Together

Chapter 11

Blair

Blair paced back and forth in her room as she tried to sort out all of her thoughts. Since it was Friday, she’d normally be watching Nolan, but it was the Fourth of July, which meant Erin didn’t work. It probably would have been a relief to have the day off if Erin wasn’t

coming back to her house today.

How the hell did she get herself into this mess? She was supposed to be separating her personal and professional life, not bringing them together like two long-lost twins separated at birth.

“Would you please stop pacing and tell me what the hell has you so rattled?” Marisol asked.

Blair stopped and took a deep breath. She needed to tell Marisol now, so she wasn’t shocked when Erin showed up in a few hours. “So, someone is coming today.”

“Okay. Who is it?” Marisol’s eyes lit up. “Is it the girl you were hooking up with? I figured things had fizzled out since you didn’t say anything else about her, but was that because things were becoming more serious?” Marisol wiggled her eyebrows.

“Nope.” Blair shook her head dramatically. “It’s Nolan. And Erin…” Blair hesitated for a moment. “And Erin’s family.”

Marisol’s eyes went wide in amusement, and she let out a low whistle. “Meeting the fams, huh? This is getting serious.” She waved her hand in a go on motion. “I need details. How did this happen? When did you invite her?”

“It happened on Monday, but I didn’t invite her. My dad did.”

“Hold up!

What

?” Marisol jumped from the bed and made a mind-blown sign over her head. “She already met your parents? And your dad invited her to the Fourth of July party just like that?”

Blair nodded. “I brought Nolan here on Monday, because the public pool was closed. When Erin came to pick him up, my mom invited her for dinner. Then, my dad proceeded to invite her and her

whole family

to our Fourth of July party. I think they are overcompensating since they know she’s a single mom. You know how my parents are. They mean well but take things too far sometimes.”

Marisol sat back down. “I guess I’m more shocked that she actually said yes.”

Blair hesitantly put one hand in the air. “That’s kind of on me. I told her I really wanted her to come. Practically begged her to say yes.”

Marisol laughed. “Of course you did.”

Blair sat down next to Marisol and petted Moon, who had followed her onto the bed and laid down right beside her. “It’s not like that. I got this strange feeling that she realized my parents had ulterior motives. Well-meaning motives, but still. The last thing I wanted was for her to feel like people were taking pity on her. I know she wouldn’t want that.”

“Okay. That actually makes sense. But why did you wait until today to tell me? We’ve texted every day this week and even hung out on Wednesday night. You didn’t say anything.”

“That’s because I was putting off hearing what I know you’re going to say next.”

“And what would that be? That this totally

isn’t

a lush anymore?”

Blair cringed. “Yep. That would be it.”

“Luckily, you didn’t need me to say it since

you

clearly already realized that.”

“I know.” Blair lay back on the bed and Moon moved with her, pushing against her side like a needy child. “What the hell am I supposed to do? I can’t have a crush on the mom of the kid I babysit for and clearly my original plan to distance myself isn’t working. So, what now?”

Marisol lay down beside her and took her hand. “I realize I’ve been teasing you about this all summer, but it’s really no big deal. It’s a crush. I know it’s all new to you since you never let yourself have them for whatever reason, but a crush doesn’t have to be the end of the world. Have fun with it. Picture her naked. When you masturbate, fantasize about her having her wicked way with you. After a while, you’ll get over it and you’ll move on to your next victim, who just might happen to be someone you actually have a chance with.” Marisol elbowed Blair playfully in the side.

Blair knew Marisol was teasing her, and it’s not like she was wrong. Of course she didn’t have a chance with Erin. Still, hearing the words spoken out loud definitely stung. She wanted all of those moments they shared to be more than just wishful thinking. She wanted to believe she wasn’t just imagining the way Erin sometimes looked at her.

“So, just have fun with it, huh?” Blair asked, trying to keep her voice as level as possible to avoid showing Marisol just how deep this crush was.

“Exactly. Since you’re the queen of fun, I’m sure you’ll have no problem with that.”

Maybe Marisol was right. Why couldn’t Blair just have fun with this? Her

boss

was hot and fun, and Blair got to spend time with her outside of “work.” What more could she ask for from her first job? Blair wasn’t naive enough to think there was any chance they could ride off into the sunset together, so why not enjoy whatever ride they were on right now? Plus, Marisol wasn’t wrong. This was the type of thing wet dreams were made of. If she wasn’t going to get the girl (which she obviously wasn’t), she might as well get a few orgasms out of the deal.

“You know what? You’re right.”

“Of course I’m right. I’m

always

right.” Marisol rolled onto her side. “Now we just need to figure out what you’re wearing today.”

***

After much discussion, Blair and Marisol settled on a skimpy red bikini top and rainbow board shorts. Any questions Blair had about whether that was the right choice flew out the window when Erin arrived with her family.

As soon as Blair opened the door, Erin’s jaw dropped and there was no question what it was in response to. That was made obvious by the fact that she didn’t take her eyes off of Blair from the moment they walked through the door. Blair couldn’t help but smile as Erin’s eyes subtly moved up her body, slowing down when they scanned past her bikini. To anyone not paying close attention, it would have gone unnoticed, but Blair was

very

focused on Erin. Her blonde hair was in a messy bun on top of her head, right behind a pair of large sunglasses that she should have kept on if she wanted to hide her wandering eyes.

When those eyes met Blair’s, it felt like all of the air was sucked from the room. Blair could hardly breathe as all of the noise surrounding them faded away and time seemed to stop. She wanted to spend the whole day lost in Erin’s eyes, but she knew if she didn’t look away soon, someone might notice. As much as Erin clearly liked what she saw, Blair was sure the last thing she wanted was for anyone to think she had a crush on the young babysitter. Because she obviously didn’t. How could she? Erin was mature and sweet and a fucking amazing mom. She would never have time for someone like Blair, even if she did find her aesthetically pleasing.

She forced her eyes away and focused on the older woman standing next to Erin. She stuck a hand out toward her. “Hi. I’m Blair. You must be Erin’s sister.”

The woman’s face lit up just like Blair hoped it would. “Aren’t you a charmer?” she asked with a laugh. “I am obviously the mom.” She put her hand on Nolan’s head. “Or the grandma, depending on who you’re talking to.”

“Well, Mrs. Corcoran, it's a pleasure to meet you.”

“It’s actually Mrs. Morrison, but it’s also fine if you call me Martha. Either one works for me.”

Of course. Erin probably changed her name when she got married. Why didn’t Blair think of that?

Probably because

I don’t want to think

about her being with anyone else, even though she’s not actually with me.

“Sorry. Very nice to meet you,

Mrs. Morrison.

” Blair still felt like she was too young to get away with calling adults by their first names, even if they told her it was okay. She turned to the next person in line, who was another woman who looked very similar to both Erin and her mom. “And you must actually be the sister.”

“That I am. My name is April.”

After shaking hands, April introduced Blair to her husband, Wesley, and their kids, Sydney (who was fourteen), and Tanner (who was twelve).

After introductions were done, Nolan offered (or more so demanded) to show Erin’s family the pool, leaving Erin and Blair behind.

“So, I take it you still have your ex’s name?” Blair asked, internally reprimanding herself as soon as the question was out.

That’s none of your business.

“No, actually. My mom switched back to her maiden name after my dad left us, but she kept our last names the same because she thought it would be too confusing for us if she changed them.” Erin clenched her jaw. “I really wish she had though. I hate sharing anything with that man.”

“I’m really sorry.” Blair didn’t actually know anything about Erin’s family. Before today, she didn’t even know their names, which made sense since she and Erin never really had personal conversations. The fact that Erin’s dad clearly left her and then her ex-wife did the same to Nolan, broke her heart.

Erin looked out into the distance as if she was trying to avoid looking at Blair. “It’s okay. I’m not even sure why I said that out loud. I don’t need to bore you with all of my past traumas.”

Before she could overthink it, Blair reached out and squeezed Erin’s hand. “You could never bore me.”

Her words caused Erin to turn her head, and when those eyes met Blair's, she was transported right back to that moment they were having when Erin first walked in. Blair swallowed hard as she watched Erin bite her bottom lip and bring her eyes to Blair’s lips, almost as if she was thinking about kissing them as much as Blair thought about kissing hers.

Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case, and as much fun as it was to imagine, there was a time and place to do it and standing by the front door at her parents’ house was not it. “Well, for what it’s worth, I think someone would have to be an idiot to leave you.”

“Yet people seem to have no trouble doing it,” Erin said with a strained laugh. She blinked her eyes in what looked like an effort to hold back tears.

Blair nodded toward the door. “Do you want to go for a walk?”

Erin shook her head. “You don’t need to do that. I’ll be fine, I promise.”

“I know I don’t

need

to. I

want

to.” She squeezed Erin’s arm, but this time, more playfully. “Come on. I’m sure Nolan is going to keep your family occupied for at least a few minutes giving his grand tour, so what do you say?”

Erin smiled, and for the first time in the past few minutes, it was a sincere smile that actually reached her eyes. “Okay, let’s go.”

Blair led her out the front door and onto the sidewalk that ran in a circle around her neighborhood. “Talk to me,” she said when she realized Erin wasn’t going to say anything without a little prompting.

“I’m seriously fine. I’m sorry. I don’t know why I was starting to get emotional. I think I’m getting my period or something.” Erin laughed and shook her head. “Not that you needed to know that.”

“Hey, we’re both women. It’s nothing I haven’t dealt with myself. You don’t need to apologize, though.

I’m

the one who should be apologizing. I shouldn’t have brought up your last name.”

Erin shrugged. “I’m sure it would’ve come up eventually. My dad left when I was two, which is really ironic since that’s the same age Nolan was when his other mom left. I can’t remember my dad, so all I know about him are the things I’ve heard. In reality, his leaving should be much harder on April since he left when she was ten, but it always felt like he left

because

of me. He was with my mom for seven years before my sister was born and then stayed around for ten years of her life, but couldn’t make it more than two years with me.”

This was a lot for Blair to take in, and she wasn’t sure what to say. She knew nothing she could say would make things better, but she wanted to say

something.

“Well, since I know he didn’t

actually

leave because of you, do you know why he did?”

Erin gritted her teeth as she stared straight ahead. “He was having an affair. It apparently started right after I was born, and he left when his other woman got pregnant. He essentially exchanged his old family for a newer model. I only know that because I overheard my mom talking about it with one of her friends when she didn’t think I was around. He paid child support and would send a birthday card to me every year. He never wrote anything in it. Just signed

Dad

and threw in a hundred-dollar bill, like that somehow made up for him not being in my life. That’s why I told Bianca, my ex, that I didn’t want anything from her when she left, not even child support. If she doesn’t want to be part of Nolan’s life, I want her completely out of it in every way.”

Blair took a breath and blew it out. This was some deep shit, and nothing she said in response would make it better, but she also didn’t want to make it worse. She stopped walking and turned to look at Erin. “I wish I knew what to say to all of that, but I know I can’t make it better or change the effect it has on you. What I can tell you is even though I’ve only known you a month, I couldn’t imagine ever walking away from you.”

Shit. That might’ve been a bit much.

“I mean, I know I’m just the babysitter and that doesn’t hold much weight, but I think you’re pretty awesome.”

Erin stared at Blair for a long time, her mouth opening and closing multiple times as if she couldn’t think of what to say in response. The fourth time she snapped it shut, she squeezed her eyes closed as well. A few seconds later, tears started to stream down her face.

“Shit.” Unsure what to do, Blair wrapped Erin in an awkward loose hug and patted her on the back as if she was Nolan. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

Much to her surprise, Erin held her tight and cried onto her shoulder.

“Shh, it’s okay,” Blair said softly. “Let it out. Everything is okay. I’m here. I’ve got you.”

Blair wasn’t sure how much time passed, but eventually, Erin pulled away and promptly wiped her eyes on her shirt as if she thought that would erase the past few minutes. “I’m so sorry about that. I think I’ve held it in for so long that it all just came flooding out at once. I try to be so strong for Nolan, and because of that, I haven’t really given myself a chance to feel. I shouldn’t have put that all on you though. It’s not fair.”

Blair reached out her hand and rubbed Erin’s arm. “Hey, I asked, didn’t I? I’m just sorry if I said something wrong.”

Erin shook her head. “You didn’t. It was the opposite, actually. I can’t remember the last time someone said something so sweet to me.”

Something so sweet?

All Blair had done was tell her the truth. “If that’s truly the case, then I’m sorry more people in your life aren’t telling you how amazing you are. You’re like superwoman, and you deserve to be reminded of that every day.”

Erin chuckled as a few more tears ran down her cheeks. “God, I’m sorry I’m such a mess. Today is supposed to be a celebration, and here I am unloading all of my baggage on you from the past thirty-two years.”

Blair waved a hand at her. “Don’t sweat it. What are we even celebrating? In case you missed it, America kind of sucks right now. I think crying today is far more logical than running around shouting

’Merica

!”

Erin laughed again. “You’re not wrong.”

Blair smirked. “I never am.”

If it were up to Blair, they would have spent the whole day out there, away from everyone else. Just the two of them. She didn’t want a superficial relationship with Erin. Now that she had gotten a peek into her past, she wanted to know more. She wanted to know what made her laugh and exactly how she looked when she did. She wanted to know what made her the happiest, so she could give it to her. She wanted to know

her

, all of the best and the worst parts.

Unfortunately, less than a minute later, Erin pointed back toward the house. “We should probably get back to the party before my family realizes I’m missing and thinks I bailed on them.”

Blair put her hands in her pockets and rocked back and forth on the heels of her feet. She wanted to think of any excuse to keep Erin out here with her, even if that was completely selfish. “I’m sure they’re okay. My mom probably swept them up in some long-winded conversation about who knows what.”

Erin stared back at the house as if she was watching for someone. “I don’t want Nolan to get upset.”

That was all Blair needed to hear. As much as she wanted to be selfish and try to take advantage of finally having alone time with Erin, she knew someone else needed Erin more, and she would never do anything to hurt the little boy who had quickly become her favorite person in the world.