Chapter Thirty-Two

“ T hat was incredible,” said Sienna, sitting at a high table in the upmarket bar she, Philippa and Roderick had directly adjourned to following the meeting.

“It was,” said Philippa. “You did an excellent job. Well done.”

“I can’t believe he just said then and there we had the contract,” said Sienna. “I didn’t think that would happen.” Her eyes were wide.

“It’s certainly unusual,” agreed Philippa.

Roderick returned from the bar with a bottle of Champagne and three glasses. “If we can’t celebrate with bubbles today, when can we?” he said, grinning as he sat down. “Well done to you both. That was outstanding work.”

Philippa raised her eyebrows. She hadn’t expected him to be so magnanimous. “Well thank you, for being here and helping to answer questions.”

“You’re welcome. Anything I can do to get it over the line,” he said, pouring each of them a generous glass of fizz. “And Sienna, you’ve done a great little job on this.”

Philippa sighed inwardly. “There’s no little about it. Sienna did a great job.”

“Thanks,” she said, her face glowing as she looked across at Philippa, barely acknowledging Roderick.

“And I have to say, Philippa,” said Roderick, clearly keen to stay in the conversation, “the design work you had done was a stroke of genius. It really brought everything to life. I loved it.”

“Thanks,” said Philippa. “Sienna worked hard on that, too. But yes, I agree. It seemed to impress the panel.”

Philippa texted Alex to meet her outside the bar in half an hour.

In a bid to reclaim her life from work, she’d decided she would only stay for one drink with her colleagues.

She was excited to see the woman who had turned her into what Chrissie termed ‘giggly Philippa’.

She wondered if that was a version of her that Dottie had ever seen. Perhaps she should.

The three colleagues replayed the key moments from the presentation, including the moment that Gerry had proffered his hand across the boardroom table to shake Philippa’s. “It was like a scene from The Apprentice ,” said Sienna, her cheeks pink from the bubbles.

“That was brilliant,” said Roderick. “But hey, I need to make a move. The wife will never forgive me if I’m late home.

” He rolled his eyes. Sienna laughed awkwardly, but Philippa’s face remained stoney.

She made a mental note to ensure that Roderick had done his EDI training, particularly when it came to gender equality and sexism.

“God, you’re fearless,” said Sienna after Roderick had left the room. She drained her glass and poured herself another. “You just faced him down right there.”

“I don’t know what you mean,” said Philippa drily. Technically, Roderick was a partner in the firm, albeit a junior one, and she didn’t want to criticise him in front of an employee. She did allow herself the glimmer of a smile though.

“You are, though,” said Sienna. “Wow, this has totally gone to my head.” She took another generous sip.

“Well, we deserve to celebrate,” said Philippa. “After all, we’ve just taken our company into a new chapter. You deserve a bit of fun.”

“Maybe you do, too,” said Sienna, looking intently at her boss.

Philippa laughed. “I think we all do.”

“But I mean it,” said Sienna. “You work so hard, and you seem on top of everything. I feel like you deserve to relax a bit.” Sienna’s voice was low, and Philippa had the sense that she was trying to say more than just those words.

Philippa smiled. “Well, perhaps.”

Sienna adjusted herself on the stool she was on to face Philippa and leaned slightly forwards. “I think you don’t get how amazing you are,” she said.

“Sorry?” said Philippa, aware that Sienna’s hand was apparently resting on her knee.

“You can’t see it,” said Sienna, into Philippa’s confused face, “but I can.”

“I…” but Philippa was cut off by the younger woman leaning in and touching her lips to Philippa’s.

“I see the pitch went well,” said a voice beside them. Philippa and Sienna flew apart. It was Alex. “I’m a little early.” Her mouth was a straight line.

“Hi,” said Philippa, “yes, you are. Sorry.”

“We were just celebrating,” said Sienna.

“I can see that,” said Alex, raising her eyebrows. “I’ll leave you guys to it.” She turned and walked out of the bar.

Philippa was momentarily thrown. She stood to follow, but Alex turned and held out her hand. “No,” she said, “don’t follow me.” The bar door slammed, and so did Philippa’s heart.

Philippa sat back down and looked towards Sienna. “This is not happening, Sienna.”

“I’m sorry,” said the younger woman, biting her lip. “I got carried away.”

“You did,” said Philippa. “And there are many, many reasons why it’s not happening. Not least because of the power dynamic here. That, and Alex over there is special to me.”

“Oh,” said Sienna, her already red face rapidly getting even redder. “Oh god, I’m such an idiot. I’ll resign immediately. I’m so sorry.”

Philippa held up her hands. “Shhh. That won’t be necessary.” She sighed. “Go home, sober up, and we’ll speak no more of this.”

Sienna nodded meekly. She gathered her jacket and her bag and crept out of the bar, following in Alex’s footsteps.

Philippa lifted her glass to her lips. Suddenly, Champagne seemed like the wrong thing to be drinking. She drained her glass and poured herself the remnants of the bottle. She couldn’t face going home right now, not after she’d messed everything up with Alex.

Philippa pulled out her phone, hoping against hope that there was a message from Alex there. There was, but it had been sent twenty minutes earlier. “Hey gorgeous, can’t wait to see you and I bet you’ll be celebrating. I’ll be a bit early x”

Philippa rested her chin on her hands. She’d just had the best sex of her life, with a woman who meant more to her than one hot night, and she’d wrecked it thanks to a misjudged conversation with a member of staff.

Alex had warned her that Sienna had a thing for her, but Philippa couldn’t see it.

The whole idea that women might want her was new to her, and she wasn’t ready.

What made it even more frustrating was that while objectively she could see that Sienna was an attractive woman, Philippa didn’t fancy her at all. It was all such a mess.

She looked at her phone again. Alex might have told her not to follow her, but she couldn’t resist sending a text. But what could she say? As she was staring at it, her phone lit up again. “How did the bid go, bab? x” It was Charlie.

“Brilliantly, but now I’ve ruined my life and I need your help. Gin and tonic do you? x” texted back Philippa.

“??? send me the address xx” came back from Charlie.

Philippa smiled. She was lucky to have him as a friend. If anyone understood, it would be Charlie. And he knew Alex, so maybe he could help her understand what best to do next.

She ordered gin and tonics for them both. Champagne was rapidly losing its appeal.