Page 4 of Dust and Desire (Sagebrush Cowboys #5)

Dustin

I stood outside Dolly’s Diner, shifting back and forth nervously.

It wasn’t the first time I’d been invited to karaoke, and not even the first time I’d attended, but that didn’t stop the nerves from acting up.

The singing wasn’t the difficult part, not that I ever did that.

It was just the socializing… and the realization that I was the only one there without anyone. It made me feel horribly out of place.

I forced myself to take a deep breath. I was being pathetic again and feeling bad for myself.

And what did I have to feel bad about? I had money, my own place, and all the peace I could ask for.

I wasn’t tied down to a marriage anymore either.

But I still couldn’t help feeling like an outsider, like a stray that the others tolerated out of some sense of pity.

I pushed open the glass door to Dolly’s, the familiar chime announcing my arrival.

The diner was exactly what you’d expect from a small Texas town.

It had red vinyl booths, checkered linoleum floors, and the lingering scent of coffee and fried food permeated everything.

But tonight it felt different, alive with laughter and the buzz of conversation from the back corner where someone had set up a karaoke machine .

“Well, look who decided to show up!” Colt’s voice boomed across the restaurant, and I felt every pair of eyes in the place turn toward me. Heat crept up my neck as I spotted him waving me over to a large booth where the usual suspects were crammed together like sardines.

Logan and Dakota sat pressed close together on one side, Dakota’s arm draped casually over Logan’s shoulders.

Across from them, Eli had claimed the corner spot, leaving just enough room for Colt to slide in beside him.

The other couples were scattered around nearby tables, creating a small constellation of gay cowboys that would have been unthinkable in most small towns.

And then there was me. Standing there like an idiot with my hands shoved deep in my pockets.

“Dustin!” Dakota called out, gesturing to an empty chair they’d pulled up to the table. “We saved you a spot.”

I made my way over, acutely aware of how the chair separated me from the cozy booth arrangement. Like a kid at the adult table during Thanksgiving dinner.

“Thought you might chicken out,” Colt said with that trademark grin, but his eyes held genuine warmth. “Glad you made it.”

“Yeah, well,” I shrugged, settling into the chair. “Had to see if you could actually carry a tune or if it’s all hype.”

The group laughed, and some of the tension in my shoulders eased. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all.

“What can I get you, honey?” The waitress appeared at my elbow. It was Dolly herself, a woman in her mid-forties with teased blonde hair, red nails, and a smile that could charm the devil himself.

“Just a beer,” I said. “Whatever’s on tap.”

“Make it two,” a voice said behind me. “I’m buyin’.”

I turned to see a man I didn’t recognize sliding into the chair beside me.

He was younger than me, maybe late twenties, with dark hair and the kind of easy confidence that made people gravitate toward him.

But what caught my attention were his eyes, warm honey brown and focused entirely on me with an intensity that made my stomach flip.

“Alex Reyes,” he said, extending his hand. “I’m the new ranch hand at the Baker place.”

“Dustin Corvus,” I replied, shaking his hand. His grip was firm, calloused, and he held on just a beat longer than necessary, a silent grin in his eyes.

“The famous investor,” Alex said, not letting go of my hand. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

“Nothing good, I hope,” I managed, attempting to make a joke. I felt myself falling back into old corporate habits. Small talk was a skill I’d learned, not a natural gift. “How are you liking the place?”

“Like it just fine so far,” Alex said, finally releasing my hand but not breaking eye contact. “Though I’m still getting acquainted with all the... local attractions.”

The way he said it, with that slight pause and the hint of a smile playing at his lips, made heat pool low in my belly. Was he flirting with me? It had been so long since anyone had looked at me like that, I wasn’t sure I could trust my own judgment.

“Well, you picked a good night for it,” Logan interjected, seemingly oblivious to the tension crackling between Alex and me. “Colt’s been bragging all week about how he’s gonna show everyone up on the karaoke machine.”

“Is that so?” Alex turned that warm gaze toward Colt, but I caught him glancing back at me from the corner of his eye. “Might have some competition tonight.”

Colt straightened in his seat, that competitive streak I’d witnessed at the arena flaring to life. “You sing, new guy?”

“A little,” Alex said with false modesty that fooled absolutely no one at the table.

Dolly returned with our beers, setting them down with practiced efficiency. I took a long pull from mine, grateful for something to do with my hands. The cold liquid helped calm my nerves, but it did nothing to stop me from sneaking glances at Alex .

He was handsome in a rugged way that was completely different from Colt’s flashy rodeo star appeal.

Where Colt was all bright smiles and obvious charm, Alex had something quieter, more mysterious.

The kind of man who probably had stories he didn’t tell and secrets he kept close to his chest. Or maybe I’d just been reading too many romance novels alone in my tiny house.

That was probably the most likely answer.

“So, what’s your story, Dustin?” Alex asked, turning his full attention back to me. “Logan mentioned you’re from New York originally?”

“Corporate lawyer,” I said, then immediately wished I’d said something more interesting. “Was, anyway. Gave it up to move out here.”

“That’s quite a change,” Alex observed, leaning closer. His knee brushed against mine under the table, and I wasn’t sure if it was intentional or just the cramped seating arrangement. “What made you decide to trade skyscrapers for cattle?”

The honest answer was too complicated, too raw to share with a stranger in a crowded diner.

The divorce, the revelation about my sexuality, the crushing self-loathing that had nearly driven me to do something stupid.

Instead, I fell back on the sanitized version I’d been giving people since I moved to Sagebrush.

“Needed a change of scenery,” I said with a shrug. “Sometimes you just know when it’s time to start over.”

Alex nodded slowly, like he understood more than I was saying. “I get that. Sometimes running toward something new is the only way to stop running from what’s behind you.”

There was something in his voice, a note of personal experience that made me look at him more closely. What was he running from?

“Alright Reyes,” Colt said, slapping the table and startling us both. “Let’s see what you’ve got.”

“You’re on,” Alex replied without missing a beat.

He was much smoother than I was. It took me a moment to snap out of my spiral, to come back to the diner and the present.

It was so easy to get stuck in the past without realizing it sometimes.

However, the gorgeous view I was afforded as Alex and Colt walked to the karaoke machine was enough to bring any man back to his senses.

“Christ,” Eli sighed. “I never get tired of watching that man walk away.” He glanced over at me with a sly knowing grin. “Not bad, huh?”

“I… uh…” I stammered.

And thankfully I didn’t have to finish my thought because the music started up, both Alex and Colt taking up their microphones to get the night underway.

The opening guitar riff of “ Save a Horse (Ride a Cowboy) ” blasted through the diner’s speakers, and I nearly choked on my beer. Of course they’d pick that song. The irony wasn’t lost on me, nor on anyone else at the table, judging by the hoots and hollers that erupted.

Alex grabbed the mic first, launching into the opening verse with surprising confidence. His voice was rich and smooth, with just enough roughness around the edges to make it interesting. But when Colt joined in for the chorus, their voices blended in a way that sent shivers down my spine.

“Damn,” Dakota whispered, leaning across the table. “New guy’s got pipes.”

I couldn’t tear my eyes away from Alex. He moved with an easy grace, completely uninhibited as he played to the small crowd. When he caught me staring, he winked, actually fucking winked, and my face burned hot enough to fry an egg.

“I think someone’s got an admirer,” Eli said under his breath, nudging me with his elbow.

“What? No,” I protested weakly. “He’s just being friendly.”

Eli gave me a look that said he wasn’t buying it. “Friendly is asking how your day was. That—” he nodded toward Alex, who was now singing directly at me, “—is a man making his intentions crystal clear. ”

I sank lower in my chair, desperately wishing I could disappear.

Not because I wasn’t interested, God help me, I was about as lonely as they came, but because I had no idea what to do with that interest. It had been so long since I’d navigated anything resembling flirtation that I felt like I was drowning in unfamiliar waters.

The last person I’d ever dated was my ex-wife.

The song ended with both men striking dramatic poses, and the diner erupted in applause. They high-fived, competitive tension momentarily forgotten in their shared triumph, before making their way back to our table.

“Your turn,” Colt announced, dropping into his seat beside Eli. “Who’s up next?”

“Dustin hasn’t gone yet,” Alex suggested, sliding back into the chair beside me. He was slightly breathless from the performance, a fine sheen of sweat making his skin glow under the diner’s lights. “I bet he’s got a great voice.”

“Oh, I don’t—” I began, but Dakota was already nodding enthusiastically.

“Come on, Dustin! You can’t just watch all night.”

“I’m more of an observer,” I insisted, clutching my beer like a lifeline.

“I’ll go with you,” Alex offered, his voice dropping lower so only I could hear. “We can do a duet.”

The thought of standing next to him, sharing a microphone, possibly brushing against him in the small space by the karaoke machine… it was both terrifying and exhilarating.

“I really don’t sing,” I managed, hating the tremor in my voice.

Alex leaned closer, his shoulder brushing mine. “Everyone sings,” he said softly, his breath warm against my ear. “Some just need the right... motivation.”

The way he said “ motivation ” made my mouth go dry. I swallowed hard, trying to ignore how his proximity was making my heart race. The scent of him, sweet and rugged at the same time, was intoxicating .

“I think I need another beer before I’d consider that kind of public humiliation,” I said, draining what remained of my first.

“I can arrange that,” Alex replied with a grin, signaling to Dolly for two more. His eyes never left mine, and I found myself unable to look away, caught in his gaze like a deer in headlights.

Across the table, Logan and Dakota had launched into a spirited rendition of “ Islands in the Stream ,” their voices blending together with the ease of a couple who knew each other inside and out.

I watched them, a pang of envy twisting in my chest. They moved around each other with such natural grace, anticipating each other’s movements, sharing secret smiles.

It was the kind of connection I’d never had with Alicia, the kind I was beginning to think I’d never have with anyone.

“They’re good together,” Alex observed, following my gaze.

“Yeah,” I agreed, my voice softer than I intended. “They are.”

“They been together long?”

“A couple years now. They met just before Logan was trying to save the ranch.”

Alex nodded thoughtfully, his eyes still on the couple. “And what about you? Anyone special back in New York?”

I let out a humorless laugh. “No. And nobody here either.” My eyes darted to Colt for a moment before dipping back to my lap. “I’m not brave enough for that sort of thing.”

Alex’s hand was on my shoulder, squeezing it gently. “Maybe you just need someone to make the first move,” he suggested. He lowered his voice to a whisper, leaning close until his breath tickled my neck. “I hear you’ve got a nice little private spot out on the backside of the ranch. I could?—”

“I need to go,” I said suddenly, standing up so fast that I nearly shouldered Alex right in the jaw.

“What?” Colt cried, turning to face me. “You can’t leave yet! You just got here!”

“I… I forgot something back at the house,” I said, scrambling for so me sort of excuse. “The stove… is on. I think I left it on. I don’t want the place to burn down.”

“But Dustin?—”

“Gotta go!” I called, heading for the door before Colt or any of the others could stop me.

I allowed myself one tiny glance back at Alex, a look of surprise affixed to his expression.

His eyes were almost apologetic though, like he knew he’d driven me away.

But the truth was that I couldn’t handle his flirtations.

I didn’t know how to process them, how to accept them, or felt that I was deserving of them.

It was just too much to handle all at once.

And as I left the diner, I mentally kicked myself for being such a coward. Up until that moment I thought my lack of dating prospects was something outside of my control. But now I realized, once again, that it was my fault. I wasn’t brave enough to even try.