Page 21 of Denying Her Mate (The Wolves of Black Mountain #3)

Chapter 21

Roux

T he tight clasping of her hands together is the only indication Dove gives of her nerves, as she sits on the couch in Hester’s living room. The urge to touch her temple and drag all the things she knows out of her mind consumes me as I stare at her.

I want desperately to believe she is on our side, and not just because I want to like Dove. I have to hold onto the hope that the other women who are captives of the Order can regain their lives back.

“So… what are we doing?” Dove asks as the rest of the coven take their places around the room.

Tessa, who is sitting next to her, grabs her hands in hers. I track the movement, waiting for any reaction from her, but Dove doesn’t respond with aggression. It is almost as if all the fight she had when she first arrived has slowly drained out of her. “We thought we would have another look at the mind block, with your permission, of course.”

I wait for her to resist, expecting her to put up a fight, but she simply shifts her shoulders. “If you think it will help.”

“We want to get you back to who you are,” Halle says. “You deserve to know your past.”

“Have you remembered anything?” I ask the question, trying not to make it sound accusatory. I don’t want to think badly of Dove, but I can’t ignore Sawyer’s voice in the back of my mind asking questions.

Dove shakes her head. “It’s as if there is a wall between me and my memories. I can sense the magic, but I can’t push around it or through it.”

“And you shouldn’t,” Hester warns. “You have no idea what spells were put in place.”

The words are bleak enough to make me wince, even if I understand they are true. Magic is a complicated thing, and it can be damaging if used incorrectly. I have seen that firsthand in my interaction with Edward. Control is the most important element to be practiced. Not one of us in this room, aside from Hester, has complete control over our powers. We are all fledgling novices trying to navigate our way through a force we don’t fully understand. It does scare me, wondering if I might once again unintentionally hurt somebody I care about.

Sawyer trusts me, and I love him for it, but I’m not at a stage where I trust myself yet. If I ever hurt him, I wouldn’t survive it. Since our mating bond slipped into place, he has become part of me, interwoven with the very cells in my body.

“Do you think it’s a good idea to go poking around?” Apryle asks. As usual, she has taken up a position furthest from the rest of us, as if she cannot stand to be close to us.

Since Dove’s arrival, she has become more distant than ever and I hate it. Apryle was the first person I truly became friends with after running from my old pack. I know she is hurting, that she feels the presence of all these new people is too much. I wish there was something I could do to help her, but I suspect she would not allow it even if I could.

“I don’t,” Hester says, surprisingly with candor, “but what is the alternative? She remains ignorant, never remembering anything about her life?”

“I want to know,” Dove interjects before Apryle can reply. “It feels as if there is a dark spot in my mind that I cannot get past. I can’t explain it, but I feel like if I know the truth, it will make everything better.”

I don’t pretend to understand the emotions or thoughts Dove is having. I can’t imagine how it must feel to lose everything and have the sense that there are things hidden from you.

“Won’t your little pit bull be pissed if we do this?” I don’t miss the mocking tone of Apryle’s words, but if Dove hears it, she doesn’t show it.

“You mean Jackson?”

Apryle’s smile is thin. “Is that not what he is? Your pit bull?”

I slide my eyes in her direction, wondering what her response is going to be. Dove mirrors her. Sitting there in the pale dress she borrowed from Tessa, she looks innocent and not like the powerful witch she is. I can’t work out if it is an act she is putting on, but I keep my wits about me, ready for anything.

“Do you believe in kindred spirits?”

Considering our entire biology is based on the idea of fate, it’s an odd question. “Of course,” I say. The others mumble their agreement, other than Hester and Apryle.

“I know there is no mating bond between us, not that I can sense anyway, but I feel as if he is mine. I know saying that will anger some of you. I know I’m not welcome here, not really, but I don’t think I can leave without him.”

The way she is talking is what I would expect from a mated pair. She has a dreamy look in her eyes while she talks about Jackson as if he walks on water for her. Perhaps the magic that blocked her memories is also doing something to any mating bond that might exist between them. It’s the only explanation I can think of, because she’s not the only one who feels it, he is just as crazy for her.

“Maybe unblocking your mind will help to figure things out,” Halle suggests.

“I feel as if I know him. And I don’t mean from here,” she says. “He is so familiar to me, but I don’t know how that’s possible.”

Neither do I, and by all accounts, neither does Jackson. Anger bubbles in my belly at the way the Order is ruining lives. It’s not enough that they take innocent tau females from their lives, from everything they have known, and make them prisoners. They also have to erase everything they are. It’s cruel.

“Let us try to find you some answers,” Tessa says in her sweet voice.

I don’t miss the ripple of nervous energy that goes through Dove, but she holds her hands out anyway to take Tessa’s.

The rest of us step forward, taking each other’s hands until we are all joined in a circle. I feel the surge of magic as soon as the circle is connected. It morphs into a steady hum, one that is familiar and reassuring, as the power of my sisters flows through me. My wolf makes a low purring sound in the back of her throat, displaying her contentedness at being connected like this.

The first push of energy through our linked bodies comes from Hester. I feel it wash through me, gathering momentum with my own power, adding to that of the rest of the coven.

I’m not sure what to expect as we creep inside Dove’s mind. It feels wrong to be here, even though we have been given permission. This is invasive in a way that feels ugly, but we need to help her remember the truth, and not just for her sake. There are other lives at risk, women like the tau we were originally trying to find. Tessa’s visions are unpredictable, as are Hester’s. Both women only see what they are meant to see.

I let the others lead the way inside Dove’s mind, letting my magic flow freely and easily as we’ve learned in our time together at the Sanctuary. Each of my coven sisters feel different to me, the magic that flows through them uniquely marked for each woman. I don’t know how to describe it, but it is almost like a fingerprint that belongs specifically to each one.

So I can tell the moment Hester’s magic is pushed aside and Halle takes control. I can also sense the irritation from Hester, and her fight to regain the upper hand. Halle does not budge, forcefully pressing against the block as we reach it. It feels like hitting a brick wall at full speed, our magic rebounding off it. It gives me a headache, my temples throbbing with pain as Halle forces our magic against it again.

Sweat trickles down my back, pooling in the dip between my hips, as the pressure builds inside my brain. Halle opens more magic between us, drawing on more power as she slams everything we have against the wall in Dove’s mind. I feel Tessa’s hand shake in mine, and I squeeze tight, hoping to give her strength as the assault continues.

The pain in my skull reaches unbearable levels, making my stomach churn violently as everything rolls around me. I can hear voices screaming for us to stop, but I don’t let go of the two hands in mine. I’m scared of what will happen if I do, so I cling tight, as if I am holding onto the edge of a boat in stormy waters.

A scream pierces my awareness, deafening and bloodcurdling, but I ignore it. I let Halle draw more power from my reserves, pushing everything each of us has against the block. My knees are weak, my neck heavy, and just as I think of giving up, a pinprick of light appears in the wall.

It grows to the size of a dime, and as we push more power through the link, it becomes bigger again. I’m barely aware of what I am doing or what is happening. The only thought I have is breaking through that wall and releasing the dam behind it.

This is not what we told Dove we were going to do, and there is part of me that feels guilty for that. We were meant to be having a look, but Halle is determined to smash through the blocks by force if necessary.

I stumble, my legs suddenly unable to hold me up. The grip on either side of me is firm, keeping me from folding, as more power surges through our coven link.

A force slams into my chest. A wrecking ball to my body. The connection between me and my sisters is severed, and I’m flying backward. Pain erupts through my spine as I smash against something hard and crumple like tissue paper to the floor.

For a moment, all I can do is lie there winded, trying to breathe through the pain in my chest. I’m aware of my coven sisters in similar positions, groaning and whimpering in their own torment.

What the hell happened?

When I raise my head, I see Hester standing in front of Dove, her hands raised in the direction of Halle and the rest of us, as if to ward off the danger.

Dove has slumped back against the couch cushions, her head lolling onto her shoulder, her jaw slack and her eyes… The color has drained from them, leaving behind milky pools of white.

I scramble quickly onto my knees, my heart thudding like a speeding bullet train beneath my ribs.

What have we done to her?

“You stupid bitches,” Hester snarls. I have never seen her so angry, but in this moment, she looks as if she wants to strike us all down. “Do you have any idea what you have done?”

Tessa stumbles to her feet, tripping as she goes to Dove’s side. She seizes her face between her hands, trying to support her weight as her head seems to wobble on her neck. “Dove? Can you hear me?”

Dove’s eyes remain milky, unseeing. Her mouth moves, as if she is speaking a litany of words, but no sounds come out. Ice fills my gut as Halle struggles to push upright.

“At least we’ve done something .”

Hester tilts her head slightly to the side, a look of pure rage on her face. “I warned you of the dangers of meddling with magic you do not understand. You think you know it all, Halle Beauford, but there are forces at work that you cannot hope to comprehend.”

Halle’s jaw tightens, a look of despair in her eyes even as she tries to remain stubbornly resolute. “I broke through my blocks. I assumed Dove would be able to do the same with some help.”

Hester crosses the room, her strides eating up the space so fast, Halle doesn’t have time to respond. She grabs her by her throat and shoves her back against the wall behind her. “You na?ve, silly little girl. You understand nothing. You are a child in this world. Not even a child, a baby. And you may have just destroyed the mind of the only person who could have helped us discover the whereabouts of the other tau females in captivity.”

She releases Halle with a shove as the room is suddenly swarmed with wolves. Cade instantly gets between his mate and Hester, growling in her face like a rabid animal.

I am so focused, I don’t realize Sawyer is here until his hands cup my face, forcing my gaze toward him. “I felt… I felt you through the bond. You’re bleeding.”

I follow his line of sight, my fingers pressing under my nose to feel warm liquid there. Blood coats my skin. “I’m okay,” I lie. I don’t know what I am, but okay is not it.

“What the fuck did you do to her?” Jackson’s angry words bite through the air.

He is crouched in front of Dove, whose eyes still remain milky and vacant, and I don’t need any bond with him to know how angry he is.

He turns to his pack mates, huffing his breath as he glares at them. “Was this part of your plan? Get me away from Dove so they could hurt her?”

The tension in the air is unbearable, and I feel panicked. What have we done to Dove, and can we fix it?

Halle steps forward, pulling out of Cade’s grasp. “I just wanted to help her. She can’t live the way she is, without information or knowledge. She deserves to know the truth, Jackson.”

Jackson comes to his feet so fast I barely register what is happening, until Cade is between his pack mate and his mate. Both males’ eyes flash, revealing their wolves, and I sense the alpha waves coming off Cade.

Jackson should back down, but instead he bares his teeth. “You all need to stay the hell away from me and Dove. You come near us, and I’ll kill you.”

He backs away from Cade, not showing his back to his alpha until he has no choice but to. Then he turns, bending so he can scoop Dove into his arms. She doesn’t try to grab him or hold him, her arms flapping uselessly at her sides as he adjusts his grip on her.

Then, without another word, Jackson leaves the room, and silence descends between us all.

“Does someone want to explain what the fuck happened?” Cade demands.

I close my eyes, ignoring the non-stop pulsing in my head, as I hope we haven’t just destroyed the mind of an innocent woman.