Page 145 of Denim & Diamonds

“It’s complicated.”

“Is it? Because to me, it’s not. If you’re not sure whether something belongs in your life, you just close your eyes and imagine it’s no longer yourchoicewhether it’s in your life anymore. If that makes you feel like a panic attack is coming on, you pull your head out of your ass and act before that choice is taken away from you.”

“But...”

“Close your eyes.”

“What?”

“Just humor me. Close your eyes for a minute.”

I wasn’t much in the mood for games, yet I took a big breath and shut my eyes.

“Now tell me the first feeling that hits you when I say each thing.”

“Okay.”

“Your fancy purse company gets bought out by a big chain that pays you a lot of money.”

It surprised me, but my shoulders relaxed.

“Whatcha feeling?”

“I think I feel relieved.”

“Good. Let’s try another one. Brock gets engaged to another woman, and you won’t see him or Patrick ever again.”

A wave of nausea rushed through me. I slapped my hand over my mouth and opened my eyes. “Oh God. That makes me sick.”

Trevor smiled and shrugged. “See? Simple.”

Fifteen minutes later, Elvin came out from the back. I stood. “How is he?”

“He’s about as patient as a tornado in a trailer park.”

I smiled for the first time since knocking on Brock’s door and getting no answer. “Can I see him? Do you think they’ll let me go back?”

Elvin nodded. “Let me talk to Fran who works the desk. She’s friends with Linda. Besides, I’m pretty sure there isn’t a better medicine for my brother than you.”

Elvin gave Trevor a quick update—clear scan, no unusual bloodwork results, and BP normal—and said Patrick just had a bottle and fell asleep. After he walked over and spoke to the woman at the desk, we went back to the examination area together. I was a ball of nerves as we passed several patients who looked pretty sick.When we got to Brock’s suite, Elvin put his hand out. “I’m going to go call my other brothers. I’ll give you two a few minutes alone.”

I didn’t even answer him. I was too busy running to Brock.

“Oh my God!” I threw my arms around him. “Thank God you’re okay!”

He held me so tightly, it was difficult to breathe. When he pulled back, he cupped both my cheeks and drew me in for a kiss. “Fuck doing the right thing,” he grumbled. “Life’s too short, Red. Today was a reminder. Unless you tell me to back off, I won’t be pretending I can handle you not being in my life. I’m too damn in love with you.”

My chest felt full. “I’m in love with you, too.”

***

The following morning, I sat in my hotel room, staring down at my phone. Brock and Patrick had stayed overnight in the hospital for observation—something Brock wasnothappy about. But he’d hit the airbag hard enough that he had two black eyes and a broken clavicle, so staying for eighteen hours and having a follow-up head scan seemed like the safe thing to do. His brothers and I reminded him that it was best for both him and Patrick, so he really couldn’t say no, though I suspected that was exactly what he would’ve done if the baby wasn’t involved.

I hadn’t slept well last night, too busy tossing and turning, trying to figure out what to do with my life. This morning, I still didn’t have any answers, but I’d done enough soul searching to figure out part of the problem.I had unresolved issues that had nothing to do with Brock. So I took a deep breath, scrolled through my contacts, and pressed call when I got toDad.

The phone rang once, twice, and I felt more and more panicked. I wanted nothing more than to hang up, but my desire to figure things out with Brock was stronger than my need to run away. I thought I was about to get a reprieve when the fourth ring came, but then my dad’s voice came on the line.

“February?”