Page 118 of Denim & Diamonds
Trevor sighed. “I know my brother would want to hear from you, no matter what’s going on. Why don’t you just call him?”
There were so many answers to that question.
Because I don’t want to face reality.
Because I’m afraid of hearing in his voice that having a baby somehow changed him.
Because I’ll have to face that another woman gave birth to his son.
Because once it happens, it might really be over between us.
“I might call…at some point,” I said.
After a long moment of silence, he added, “It’s okay to be freaked out.”
I swallowed. “I guess I’m not very good at hiding it, huh?”
“I don’t think my brother expects you to be handling this well. Certainly not any better than he’s handling it.” Trevor laughed. “He doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing. This is gonna be interesting to watch.”
“You’d better do more than watch. He’s gonna need your help.”
“It’ll be like the blind leading the blind, then.” He cackled. “But yeah, I already told him I’d take babysitting classes and shit.”
“That’ll score you some points with the ladies.”
“You think? Maybe I can score a hot single mom?” His tone turned serious. “Look, February, Brock wouldn’t want you to be sad right now. I happen to know he cares very deeply for you. And I’m just…really sorry this whole thing happened.” He paused. “Brock’s been such a good brother. He deserves happiness. And you make him happy. I wish he could have it all. But I can also understand why you might not be able to stick around anymore. No one would fault you for that.”
Heat rose from my neck to my face as my feelings consumed me, mostly guilt and sadness.
“All that said… If you have it in you to stick it out, to let my brother show you what he’s capable of, maybe things won’t work out so badly in the end. It just might take a while before he can give you the kind of attention you need.”
This conversation had gone a bit deeper than I’d expected. But I was grateful for his candor. “I’d better go,” I told him. “Thank you so much for taking my call and for the talk. I appreciate it more than you know, Trevor.”
“I’ll call you back if I hear anything, okay?”
“That would be wonderful. I appreciate it.”
“No problem. Take care, February.”
“You, too.”
After we hung up, I somehow found myself in front of the psychic place again. How the heck didthathappen? I looked around and realized that while I’dthought I’d been walking home, I’d walked in a circle, ending up where I started.
Just great. Now you’ve totally lost your mind.
That was my life lately, I supposed. Just when I thought I was making headway in getting over Brock, or at least accepting reality, I’d end up at square one, second-guessing everything.
I took the fact that I was here again as a sign to go inside and give Luna a piece of my mind for freaking me out.
But the moment I entered, she rushed to me, her eyes wide. “I’m so glad you came back!”
“Why?”
“I received further clarification. The symbols were very much about birth, not death. There isdefinitelya rebirth happening in your life, if not an actual birth.” She leaned in. “Is there any possibility that you could be pregnant?”
Pausing to think, I realized I’d just gotten my period. “No. That’s definitely not the case.” Imagine that plot twist, huh? I cringed at the thought. “There’s no pregnancy on the horizon. That’s all I can tell you.”Not mine at least.Now I worried the psychic was able to sense something pertaining to Brock’s baby. I decided I didn’t want to know anything else and exited before she could give me any other info.
Taking out my phone, I made sure to open a navigation app this time, so I knew where the hell I was going. I had the directions under control this time, but as I began to walk, tears rolled down my cheeks as I finally lost the last shred of my ability to manage my emotions.
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