Page 126 of Denim & Diamonds

He lowered his voice. “He’s sleeping, actually. Which is rare these days. So maybe thisisa good time for me to get a little shut-eye.” He took my hand and smiled. “Come here.”

Brock led me over to his sleeping baby in a little seat on the ground near the couch. He’d grown so much in just the few days he’d been alive. The resemblance to Brock was even clearer now. Patrick’s little chest rose and fell as he breathed in and out, looking so at peace.

Smiling, I bent to get a closer view, examining his perfect nose and rosy complexion. I looked up at Brock and whispered, “Go get some rest. I’ve got it.”

“Listen, I’m not sure if you know what you’re getting yourself into here.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“There are some diapers and wipes here on the end table, right on top of the changing pad.”

“Got it.” I nodded.

“I have to warn you, he has pretty good aim, so be careful if you have to change him. You might want to shut one eye.”

I chuckled. “I’ll be okay.”

“I should probably be shot for leaving you to take a nap right after you got here. But it’s too damn good an offer to pass up.” He leanedin and gave me a firm, hard kiss. “When I feel human again later, I’m gonna find a way to make it up to you.”

My body stirred.

After Brock lay down, I sat on the couch next to where Patrick was sleeping, praying he didn’t wake up. As much as I wanted to help Brock, I didn’treallyknow what I was doing. But I would’ve done anything so he could rest, even if it meant learning the ropes fast.

At one point, I peeked over at Brock to find he was sound asleep. That brought me great joy.

When I returned to my spot on the couch, though, Patrick started kicking his legs, and I knew my reprieve was over.

Growing nervous, I licked my lips. When he opened his eyes and saw me, he started to cry.

Oh no.I lifted him, bringing him over to the corner of the house farthest from Brock so as not to wake him. Bouncing him up and down gently, I said, “I can only imagine how scary it was for you to see me and not your daddy when you woke up. I know you don’t know me, but I promise it’s okay. I’m a good person.”

After several minutes of rocking back and forth, Patrick finally stopped crying.

“Are you hungry?” I cooed.

I didn’t want to wake Brock to ask him the last time Patrick had been fed, so I took a chance and reached for one of the bottles. Thankfully, Brock had containers of ready-to-pour formula right on the counter. I read the instructions on the back of one of them to make sure I wasn’t missing anything, and it seemed pretty straightforward. Just open and pour. After taking one of the clean bottles out of the drying rack next to the sink, I used my free hand to open the formula and pour it.

The moment I placed the nipple in Patrick’s mouth, he took it as if he had a vacuum attached to his little lips. The bottle was empty in no time, and I gave myself props for taking a chance and feeding him without having to interrupt his father.

Using my common sense, I held him up straighter and patted his back until he let out a burp.

“What do we do now?” I asked, placing a gentle kiss on his forehead.

It took only a few seconds before he answered in the form of a loud vibration against my arm that I surmised was an explosion.

“Oh no,” I muttered. I’d been hoping to avoid changing him.

I’d only been here a matter of minutes, but it was easy to see that caring for Patrick was a full-time job. Carrying him over to the diaper supplies on the end table, I took a deep breath and tried to remember how I used to do this when I babysat as a teenager.

“You can do this…” I murmured.

Placing the mat on the floor, I put Patrick down and braced myself for what I knew was coming. Call it muscle memory, but once I got started, it was all pretty easy. Though, I’d no sooner had that thought than urine shot up into my face. I couldn’t help but laugh. Brock had warned me.

After I cleaned up both of us, I took him over to the couch and held him in my arms. I could’ve sworn he smiled at me. Or maybe it was gas. Probably the latter.

We sat there examining each other for several minutes. As he looked up at me, probably still wondering who the hell this strange woman was, I thought about how this little person had changed the course of my life,whether he knew it or not. Despite the impact on my relationship with his father, Patrick deserved to be here, deserved to have a dad as wonderful as Brock.

“I won’t hold anything against you, little man. The timing was less than optimal, for sure. But you’re gonna make your daddy so proud. I just know it. And I’m so glad we have this quiet time to get to know each other without anyone else around. I’m not scared of you anymore, and I hope you’re not scared of me.”