Page 49

Sex was one thing, but bringing emotions in—that was one gamble too far. Friendship and sex, a change to excise the wanting that was starting to take over his body, his life.

He was just now realizing that Sam was the reason he hadn’t had sex in eight months.

She was the reason none of the women in his life lasted for very long.

He couldn’t get over the longing. The what if.

And if they could just do it now, if he could take away the mystery, then maybe he could get over that desire.

Maybe he could go back to being the friend that he should be.

Yeah, somehow, in his lust-fogged mind, that made sense. A fix-it fuck. That was what they needed.

“Okay.”

She leaned in and kissed him again, that deep, sweet kiss that was like getting hit in the face with all the things he’d always wanted growing up but never had.

A home that felt like comfort, spice and love.

Companionship. Understanding. A place he could stay and rest forever.

A refuge from everything ugly. She was so beautiful, her kiss so intoxicating, there was no room for bad feelings.

He closed his eyes and let it all wash over him, through him. This was more than lust. More than want. More than the F word he’d thought of a moment ago. This was more than he’d bargained for.

And they’d only kissed. But it was a kiss that had altered his whole body, from the inside out.

She pulled away, extending her hand, touching his lips with the tips of her finger. “I didn’t know how much I wanted this,” she said.

“I knew how much I wanted it.” He grabbed her wrist and tugged her forward, leaning back and bringing her with him so that she was astride him.

She shrieked and braced herself on the couch arm behind his head.

His erection was cradled by the heat at the apex of her thighs, her legs draped over his.

He braced his hands on her hips and looked up at her, at her wide eyes and open mouth and he thought that if he died then, he could die happy.

Almost. It would be better if he could be inside of her first.

Just the thought made his blood pump hot and fast, made him feel like he was on the edge of losing it. His control, his mind. Everything.

Sam put her hands on his chest and leaned back, tilting her head to the side, her hair spilling over her shoulder, red with gold fire around the edges in the dim lamplight.

The movie was still on, but he didn’t care. He couldn’t care about anything right now. Anything beyond what it felt like to have Sam touch him like this.

“I seem to have forgotten how to do this,” she whispered. “It’s kind of embarrassing.”

“I’m at your mercy, Sam. If this is you forgetting how, I’m in big trouble if you ever remember your moves.”

“Can we stop talking?”

“I’m in favor of that.”

Sam’s whole body trembled as she leaned in and kissed Jace, her breasts pressed against his chest, her pulse pounding like a horse’s that had just escaped through an open gate. It was too late to go back. He was right. She would always wonder. She would always want.

And their little near miss, well, she hadn’t missed and she was sure he hadn’t either. They hadn’t fully consummated, but they had pushed things past the point of no return. So maybe if they pushed further, they would do a full circle.

A little bit of sex, and they would be able to reset everything. Go back to how it was, with the mystery solved. Successful experiment done.

Or something like that. Logic was a tricky thing with Jace’s hard cock up against her clit. Yes, yes it was. He even made her think words like that. Made her feel like a totally different person.

So strange that a man she’d known for almost half of her life was able to open up something in her she’d never found before.

It made sense in a weird way, though. That sex with him would have a depth to it nothing else did.

Because their relationship had depth to it that no other relationships in her life ever had.

She only hoped she survived this. More than that, she hoped they did.

Jace pushed his fingers beneath the hem of her sweater, his skin hot against her belly. His hands skimmed upward, cupping her breasts, not-so-expertly shielded by her lace bra.

“Oh...that feels...”

“Good?” he asked, his thumb sliding over her nipple.

She arched into him, the motion hitting all the right places between her thighs and thrusting her breast into firmer contact with his hand. “Oh...yes. Oh...how do you do that?”

“What?”

“You make me...” She couldn’t say it. She didn’t say things like this.

During sex or ever. But this was Jace, and she was always honest with him.

When she wasn’t, it blew up in her face like it had earlier today.

So she decided on honesty. “You touch me, and I feel like...one more little brush of your hand will make me come. Just like that. I don’t know how you do it. ”

“It’s not usually like this for you?”

“No. Finding an orgasm is usually like searching for the Holy Grail. Tricky. Hit or miss. Step on the right stones in the right combination. Either I get there or you step on the wrong stone and I throw a spear at your head.”

He laughed, the vibration hitting her between her legs. “I hope to make it out without getting a spear thrown at me. ”

“Your laugh just did more for me than my first boyfriend could do with forty minutes and a vibrator.”

“Do you have a vibrator?”

“Not with me.”

“Damn.”

“Jace!”

“What?” he grinned, wicked, sexy. Oh, he was so sexy it hurt. “You’re the one who brought it up.”

“But you’re...straitlaced and tidy.”

“When it comes to cleaning house,” he said. “But I know how to get my hands dirty when I work. And I damn sure know how to get dirty in the bedroom.”

He sat up and wrapped his arms around her waist, kissing her long and deep. He was the best kisser ever. It was official. She’d never enjoyed kissing so much. Because when it came right down to it, it was a little awkward and someone else’s tongue was in your mouth.

But with Jace...it wasn’t awkward. And she was happy to have his tongue in her mouth. More than happy.

He lowered his hands, gripped her thighs and pulled the heart of her harder against his denim-covered erection, still kissing her.

She pulled her mouth away, leaning back, trying to catch her breath, while he tried to prevent her from breathing by kissing a path from her neck to her collarbone.

He tugged her shirt up over her head and unclipped her bra. “Oh...yes.” He leaned down and drew one nipple into his mouth, sucking hard.

“Mmm” was the only noise she could make. It sounded sharp and kittenish and she didn’t care. He pinched her other nipple lightly between his thumb and forefinger and she made the sound again, kneading his back with her fingernail.

Poppy barked and they both froze.

They looked down at the dog, who was looking at them. “She thinks you’re hurting me,” Sam said, studying Poppy and feeling...embarrassed and somehow guilty for exposing her poor dog to her and Jace’s sexual activity.

Poppy wagged her tail and approached the couch. Jace stood, cupping Sam’s ass and holding her up against him. She flailed and wrapped her arms around his neck, trying to keep herself steady.

“Mine,” Jace said, his voice almost a growl, the word directed very clearly at Poppy. “Stay down here and sleep on the couch if you want. I don’t care. But she is mine tonight, and you don’t get to interrupt.”

Sam squeaked when Jace turned and started walking them toward the stairs, pausing for a moment to kiss her again, quick and hard. “I’m not sharing,” he said, his tone hard.

It was so stupid, but she felt like swooning a little bit. Thank God he was carrying her because her knees had turned to jelly and she wasn’t sure she would be able to support her own weight.

But Jace could. He carried her up the stairs and she was surprised by how much of a turn-on it was. Such a cliché, but it made her so conscious of his strength and size, of how much of a man he was. Of how much of a woman she was.

He carried her down the hall and to his room, and when he opened the door she was assaulted by the strangest sense of familiar and new colliding.

She’d been in Jace’s bedroom before. Lots of times.

But she’d never been carried into his room and set down on the bed.

She’d never been in his room while he was looking at her like she was dessert and he was a very hungry man.

That was the real difference. She’d never been in his room when she was quite so conscious of the fact that he was a man and she was a woman.

A woman who wanted him. Very much.

There was something extra terrifying about the desire tearing through her because it was directed at Jace. And something comforting about it too.

The entire experience was an exercise in extremes. Good and bad. Terrifying and...well, terrifying. Because she’d never wanted a man like she wanted Jace right now. She’d never trembled with it, had never been so close to the edge from just kissing and a little touching.

He moved away from the bed and pulled his shirt over his head, his hands going to the buckle on his belt. She wanted to stop him. She wanted him to go faster.

Jace was a contradiction, like everything else about this situation. So familiar, yet a stranger. The lines on his face, a face she’d know anywhere, looked sharper, more drawn, his expression much more...dangerous than she’d ever seen it before.

And it was that combination, that contradiction, that thrilled her, that made her feel like she was going to die if he didn’t hurry up and take those jeans off. And a little like she might die when he did.

And then he was pushing them down his lean hips, along with his underwear. And she was looking at her best friend, naked and aroused. For her.

And good Lord, he was the biggest man she’d ever seen.