Page 10

Truthfully, Bennett’s not the kind of dad to be too up in my business. We’re close, but my dad respects the fact that I lived the first fifteen years of my life without family. That doesn’t mean he gave me total freedom during my teenage years. Quite the opposite

But he held on loosely with certain things, because what’s the point of being overprotective when your kid had already been through a host of traumatic things by the time he was five? It was never about him overprotecting me, overcompensating. He gave me boundaries to let me know he cared.

I do wonder sometimes, though, if he’s a little more overprotective than I realize. Because he was up last night at some point, making sure I was home.

And hadn’t texted or anything to let me know he was waiting, or to say that he was worried. He’s not the type to get up in my business like that, but maybe my dad worries about me more than he pretends to.

I feel weirdly warmed by that.

The coffee maker is running too slow, and I pace around in front of it while Sarah serves herself pancakes.

“These are amazing,” she says, focusing on eating, which I can’t start until I have my coffee.

I realize that I left my phone in my room, and I go to grab it, because honestly, I wouldn’t put it past my mom to show up and knock, desperate for Intel. So, it’s better to just text her.

I grab my phone off my nightstand, and I see that I do, in fact, have two unread text messages.

I look at Kaylee’s text first.

I left breakfast for you and your friend out front.

And then my dad’s.

Sorry, ratted you out. You’re probably going to get interrogated later.

I press the message and give Dad a thumbs down, while I go back to my mom’s message and give her a thumbs up.

Then I return to the kitchen just in time for the coffee maker to finish running. I pour a cup of coffee for myself and one for Sarah, bringing it over to the table. I’ve never actually had breakfast with a woman in my house before. Another way that Sarah is special. As she should be.

Because she’s still one of the most important people in my life, even with a ten-year gap between meetings.

“Well, my family isn’t planning to invade, but we should go over to the house and meet everybody soon.” I pause. “How much do you want them to know?”

She looks down at her plate. “You can tell them whatever. I mean, you might as well tell them the truth. You have siblings, what if he follows us here…”

“First of all, that’s not going to happen.

He’s not tailing you, and we left your car for a reason.

We left a lot of things for a reason. Didn’t make a production out of moving out.

We’re six hours away. But also, he’d be rolling up on a whole Dodge militia.

My dad has two brothers, and his sister is pretty mean if I’m honest. And when I tell you, they’re not going to take kindly to you being threatened, I mean it. ”

She blinks. “Oh. Of course. You have this whole big family.”

“Yeah. I do.”

“It’s really amazing, Dallas. Whenever I thought of you, I was so worried that you were still alone. When I left you were still in foster care.”

“Yeah. I already mentioned that it kind of pushed me over the edge when you left. But all that is what led to finding my dad. They got desperate. They didn’t have anywhere else to put me.”

“Losing me really did that to you?” She looks hungry for the answer.

I get it. I know that feeling way too well, and she hasn’t had the family I’ve had these past nine years making everything better.

Reunification is supposed to be a good thing. It’s supposed to be the kind of thing that a kid in care dreams of. But in her case, it was a nightmare. It didn’t give her anything good. The irony that she lost support when she went back to her mother is definitely not lost on me.

“I knew you didn’t want to go back to her.

I think if you’d been happy, things would’ve been different.

I think I would’ve felt different,” I say.

“But I knew. I knew you didn’t want to go back to her.

I knew you wanted to stay with me. I couldn’t do anything.

I felt so powerless. Being just a kid, trapped in the system.

Not able to do anything. So, I lashed out.

At everyone. At everything. Because it was the only thing I could think of to do.

Or maybe it wasn’t even that calculated.

I was just angry. Angry that I lost you. ”

“Well. You have me again,” she says .

We eat the rest of our breakfast in silence, and then I decide it’s time for me to go talk to the family.

“Why don’t you wait here?” I suggest.

“Really?”

“Yeah. Just let me deal with it.”

“I’d like to meet your family.” She’s looking at me with suspicion, and I wonder if I hurt her feelings. Definitely not my intent.

“I’m not hiding you, I promise. I just don’t want to throw you in the middle of all the chaos.”

“I’m fine. Honestly. I am staying on your parents’ property, and I do feel like I should at least make an appearance. Otherwise, it’s going to be weirder.”

I laugh. “Well. True enough.”

“Just let me go get dressed. I don’t actually want to meet them in pajamas.” She grimaces. “If you can call my sweats pajamas.”

I think there’s something cute about them, though I don’t say that. She’s swamped by the fuzzy black pants, and it captivates me more than it should.

New kink unlocked? God, I hope not. Not only do I not need more issues to go with my issues, I don’t need to be panting after Sarah. My – hell, I don’t even know what to call her. My best friend. My charge.

Lord.

I go and take a quick shower, changing out of my road clothes and getting the grime off me. I broke all my own hygiene rules yesterday in the interest of getting home as quickly as possible.

When we meet up again, she’s wearing another one of those floral dresses she seems to favor.

“We can drive over, but it’s about a six-minute walk if you don’t mind. ”

“I think I’d like to walk,” she says. “Just so I can see… I mean, we rolled in the dark last night when I was mostly asleep.”

“Yeah.”

I gesture for her to follow me out of the cabin, and we’re greeted by the aggressively cheerful sunshine.

The front of the cabin is clean, but minimally landscaped.

There are a couple of planter boxes that Kaylee keeps up, but that’s all.

It’s surrounded by tall pines, and the scent of the wood, the soil and the trees is rich and sharp, as they bake in the sunshine.

“It’s beautiful here,” she says. “And quiet.”

“Sisters is probably a pretty quiet place to live.”

“Yes. Definitely.” She kicks a stone in the path. “The town gets really busy, particularly during summer. A lot of tourists.”

“Yeah. Gold Valley is the same. There’s a historic Main Street, which is where Sammy Daniels’ jewelry shop is. I’ll drive you by later. I mean, if you want to talk to her. You can also let it sit for a few days.”

“I’m going to have to figure something out. I can’t mooch off you forever.”

Wrong . That’s the word that rises up inside of me. The truth is I know it. I would take care of her for the rest of her life and I’d do it with a smile on my face.

“You have a place with me as long as you need one,” I say.

“Well, that’s… That’s really kind of you.”

We walk down the gravel road that leads back toward my parents’ place, and she lifts her face toward the sun, the way the light catches her hair, stopping me short for a moment.

I can see glimmers of the girl that she was, but she’s different, too.

I’m so sorry that she’s going through all of the bad things that she’s been dealing with, but I’m also proud of her.

She didn’t have the family that I did. She didn’t get rescued.

Everything she’s done so far, she’s done by rescuing herself, and I think that’s incredible.

I think she’s incredible. I don’t say that, though; instead, I just keep pace with her.

My dad’s house is neat and clean. He’s like that. Well-ordered and generally dependable. The house is a crisp white, and he has it repainted frequently to keep it looking perfect.

It makes me smile to see it. With all of its hanging flower pots and wide, tidy porch.

The front door bursts open, and two dogs come running out, with one old dog walking slowly behind. I can hear my sisters squealing at the chaos they’ve caused, and I hear their feet stomping on the hardwood as they run away from the scene of the crime.

The pups – who are a couple years old now but still act like squirmy babies – Jimmy and Blondie are racing around Sarah like they’re trying to do a ritual, while Dougie sits down on the porch, wagging his tail and looking up at me.

Sarah is laughing, but also clearly doesn’t entirely know what to do with the dogs. “Beasts,” I snap. “Go inside.”

The dogs stop, look at me, and race back up the porch stairs and into the house. Dougie doesn’t move. I walk up the steps and bend down, scratching him behind the ears. “Hey, buddy.”

Sarah walks up the steps slowly behind me.

“You can pet him,” I say. “He’s a good boy.”

Sarah looks reluctant but bends down and gives Dougie a brief pat on the head. She seems slightly uncomfortable around dogs, which I suddenly want to change. I don’t have a pet right now because I’m gone too much, but when I settle down, I’m going to have a lot of them.

I suddenly remember being an angry teen boy, who had never had much care in my life, being dropped into this new planet where people didn’t just care for each other, but animals too.

I can remember getting assigned to the care of Kaylee’s animals, back before she and Bennett were even dating.

“I don’t like animals,” I say.

“Why?” Kaylee is looking at me without judgment, which I know I don’t deserve.

“They’re pointless.”

“That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. Animals are important. Even if you don’t like them as pets, don’t tell me you’ve never eaten a steak. In which case, you definitely appreciate animals in one way at least.”

“I don’t understand pets,” I say.

“There’s nothing to understand. They keep you company. They love you. You love them.”

“I still don’t get it.”

“Okay. Show me where the stupid dogs are.”

“I don’t have any stupid dogs,” she says, still not angry, not taking my bait.

“Really?”

“They’re good dogs, Dallas.”

I smile as I think about that, about her. About how my family has changed my life in so many ways. I was little more than a feral animal when I came here; it took making me a bit more human for me to be able to appreciate the pets.

I look up and notice the door is still standing wide open. “Come on in,” I say. “Door’s open.”

Right as we walk in, Mom comes out of the kitchen, her strawberry blonde hair up in a bun, her smile warm. If she’s surprised to see Sarah standing there, she doesn’t really show it.

Oh God. She thinks that I’ve brought a woman home. In that way. I’ve never done that before. And it’s so far off my radar right now that it didn’t occur to me that she might think this is me making some kind of announcement.

“Bennett,” she says. “The prodigal has returned.”

“Hey, small fries,” I say. Lucy has red hair just like Kaylee, Cara has brown hair like our dad. Both are filled to the brim with energy in ways that make me feel old, honestly.

“Dallas Dallas Dallas Dallas Dallas.” They run my name together all in one shriek with no breath in between.

“Children children children children, I say back.

Which is when my dad comes into the room, surveying the situation. From the girls, back up to me.

My dad looks too young to be my dad, mostly because he is.

He and Kaylee are in their early forties.

That’s what happens when you become a teen parent.

Sometimes it feels a little bit strange to be in this house.

Even though they’ve never made me feel like I’m not exactly the same as the other kids, I don’t fit in the same way.

Lucy and Cara are the kids he meant to have.

Kaylee is the woman he chose to have children with, to spend his life with.

My mom was some early fling, and early heartbreak that faded into the background, and never would’ve come up again if not for me.

Even though I know they love me, and I don’t question that, it doesn’t mean I’m not different. It doesn’t mean I don’t occupy a whole different space in the family. One that’s unique to me.

“This is Sarah,” I say .

I know there are a lot of Sarahs. But still, they know who Sarah is.

I told them all about her. It’s Kaylee who realizes first. Kaylee who gasps, hand going to her chest as she walks right to Sarah and pulls her in for a hug.

“Oh. You’re Sarah.” She steps away from her.

“Sorry. I shouldn’t have just hugged you like that. ”

Sarah looks shocked. “Oh. It’s okay.”

“You’re his Sarah.”

Sarah’s cheeks turn pink. “I’m… I was in foster care with him.”

“He told us all about you,” Bennett says, looking grave. “How did you two find each other?”

“She came to the event this weekend.” I give them a quick summary of everything that’s happening. I don’t need to go into details about what happened with Chris; all they need to know is he went to jail for abusing her. That he’s out now and menacing her.

“You’ll be safe here,” my dad says, his voice definitive. “You’re part of our family now.”