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CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

REPUTATIONS AND VILLAGES

PENN

I’m the last one to show up at Luminary, which isn’t surprising. Our room is noisy when I walk in, and the guys all stop talking to say hello. Rhodes looks like he could use a nap, and Bowie’s already drinking his coffee like it’s a lifeline. Weston and Henley are sharing a muffin.

“You can’t get your own muffin?” I ask Weston.

He shrugs. “Trying to do what your wife said and cut out some of the sugar.”

I grin. Despite my worries lately, it still makes my heart zing when I realize I’ve got a wife.

It’s the weirdest thing.

“All right,” Henley says, stretching his shoulders. “What’s the emergency?”

“Yeah, we’re all wondering, and I am sleepy, so I’m not sure I will have the best tips.” Rhodes yawns. “Unless it’s to tell you about this move I tried on Elle last night that was?—”

“Okay,” I hold up my hand, “normally I’d be all about hearing that move, but I don’t have long today. I need to get home as soon as I can. I’m worried, guys.” I run a hand through my hair and plop in the chair, leaning my elbows on the table. “It’s Addy.”

Weston frowns. “Is she okay?”

“I don’t know.” I swallow hard and look up. “I don’t think so.”

Bowie shifts in his seat. “What’s going on?”

“She’s tired. Exhausted, really. And distant.

I don’t know how much longer she can keep going like this.

” I rub the back of my neck. “Sam and Winnie are amazing, and Addy is just…she’s unbelievable with them.

She loves them so much. But she’s trying to give her all to her job, give her all to our marriage…

and give her all to the kids…and—” I shake my head.

“I don’t know if she’s happy. I don’t think she can keep going this way.

And I don’t feel right about her giving up her dream job.

My contract will expire before too long.

I want to take her into account when I make my decision. I don’t have to keep doing this.”

Rhodes straightens. “You’d quit football?”

“I’ve made enough money for us to be set,” I say.

“I love the game. You know I do. But Addy—she’s worked for years to get where she is too.

If I can do something to help alleviate the pressure, I feel like I should.

And I’m the one who got her into this situation.

Two kids overnight?” I groan. “What was I thinking?”

Even though she offered to help me get Sam, we didn’t know it would be like this. Winnie is a gift we weren’t expecting—the best gift—but it’s a lot, and I feel like all the pressure is breaking Addy down with each passing day.

And I’m not sure she still feels like she did the right thing.

Henley whistles. “Wow.”

Weston leans forward. “Have you talked to her about it?”

I exhale. “I’ve tried. But right now, I’m scared that if I bring it up, she’ll feel like she’s failing. Like I think she can’t handle it.”

“You need to talk to her,” Rhodes says firmly. “Let her know you see how hard she’s working. And that she doesn’t have to do this alone.”

“Yes,” Weston agrees. “Sadie’s mentioned that Addy hasn’t been to the last few girls’ nights. If she’s isolating herself, that’s not good.”

Bowie nods. “And they’d love to help her. She needs to know there’s support. It’s hard to become a full-time mom overnight.”

Henley puts his hand on my shoulder and squeezes. “It takes a village, remember?”

“What if she says she can’t do it anymore?” I pick at the napkin that came with my drink.

“Then you figure it out together,” Weston says. “This is probably still just all of you trying to find your equilibrium.”

“Yeah.” I swallow hard. “Okay. Thanks. This is helping me breathe a little easier.”

After I leave the guys, I spot Coach Evans sitting at one of the corner tables. He’s alone, his hands wrapped around a mug. I hesitate for half a second before walking over.

“Hey, Coach.”

He looks up, surprised, then looks to see if Addy or the kids are with me. “Penn. Sit down?”

“Sure.” I sit down across from him and try not to tap my fingers on the table. It drives him crazy when I do that. “How’ve you been?”

He pauses before taking a drink and then says, “Actually, I’m glad to see you. I’ve been worried about Addy.”

I blink. “Me too.”

His eyes sharpen. “She tells you more than she tells me, I guess.”

I shift in my seat. “I don’t know about that. But I think she’s overwhelmed. And honestly…” I rub my jaw and lean in so he’s the only one who can hear me. “I’ve been thinking about quitting football when my contract is up.”

His eyes widen. “Quitting?”

The shock in his voice would make me laugh if this weren’t so serious.

“Yeah. I don’t want her to give up her job because of me and the kids.” I keep my voice low. “She’s worked so hard for it. If one of us has to step back, it should be me.”

He stares at me for several long beats, until I shift uncomfortably in my seat.

“You’d really walk away from football for her?” he asks softly.

“In a heartbeat,” I say without hesitation.

He leans back in his chair, his mouth opening and closing. Finally, he rubs a hand down his face. “You know, Penn…I think I may have been wrong about you.”

My brow furrows, but I wait to hear what he has to say. I can’t tell if he’s angry with me or about to cry.

He lets out a soft breath. “I owe you an apology.”

Not what I was expecting.

“I’ve always been hard on you because…well, you remind me of my little brother.”

“Really?” Another surprise.

Coach’s mouth lifts in a bittersweet smile.

“Charismatic, too good-looking for his own good. Sounds like someone else we know, right?” He smirks at me.

“He was always riding the next high, always looking for the next party and the prettiest girl in the room to charm.” His smile fades.

“He died in a car accident during his senior year.”

“Oh God,” I breathe. “Coach, I’m so sorry.”

His gaze is distant. “I thought I saw so much of him in you. But you’re not him. He would’ve never sacrificed his dreams for someone else. Maybe he would’ve gotten there eventually…we’ll never know.” He sighs. “But you? I believe you when you say you’d do it.”

I nod. “I do mean it. I’m just not sure if it’ll be enough to help her.”

“The fact that you’re willing means a lot to me, kid. Thanks for loving my daughter enough to be willing.” He pauses. “I hope she’ll talk to me. You know, my wife and I would love to get in on more of that grandkid action.”

“We’d love that. I’m sorry we haven’t done more to make that happen. We’re still trying to figure this all out.”

He chuckles. “I can understand that.”

An idea strikes me. “How about you come over Monday night when we get back in town? You and Danielle. The kids would love to see you. Maybe we can figure some things out together.”

He nods slowly. “I’d like that.”

We sit in the quiet for a moment.

“Penn?”

“Yeah?”

His mouth lifts. “You’re a good man.”

The words catch me off guard. I clear my throat and glance around the coffee shop. “Don’t go soft on me now, Coach. I’ve got a reputation to maintain.” But my smile to him is warm, and it’s the most relaxed conversation we’ve ever had.

He chuckles. “I think that reputation might be changing.”

When I get home, I see the kids on the way inside and stop to hug them and chat for a few minutes before I go find Addy. She’s in the kitchen, placing warm cookies on the counter.

“There she is,” I say. “And my favorite cookies too. You’re spoiling us.”

I come up behind her and kiss her neck, and she leans into me.

“How was your day?” I ask.

“Didn’t sit down all day,” she says.

“And you’re not now either. Why not?”

She turns in my arms and puts her hands in my hair. “Too much to do.”

“How about you put your feet up? Don’t do anything else tonight. Let me take care of things around here. Let me take care of you.”

“You’ve had a long day too. You’re probably exhausted.”

I lean in and kiss her. “Let me take care of you,” I repeat.

She smiles. “Has anyone ever told you you’re sweet, Penn Hudson?”

I frown and pretend to be thinking. “Besides my mother? Nope, don’t think so.”

She laughs. “Well, you’re not fooling anyone.”

I lift her and carry her to the couch, placing her carefully there and then putting the blanket over her.

“Hot tea?” I ask.

She blinks and nods slowly. “That sounds nice.”

“With cookies?”

“No, I’ve already had a couple.” She laughs.

“So with two cubes of sugar then. Coming right up.”

Her eyes shine. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you’re paying attention, Preacher Man.”

“Oh, I’m not missing a thing about you, Mrs. Hudson.”

When I bring her the tea, her eyes open when I place the tea on the coffee table.

“Rest. I’ll make you another cup later,” I tell her.

“Tell me something I don’t know about you yet,” she says.

I pause and sit on the couch. “Hmm. Well…I wasn’t always this…confident. I was pretty shy as a kid.”

“Really? That surprises me. You’re so self-assured now.”

“I had a growth spurt right between my freshman and sophomore years of high school. And I’d been okay at football before that, but always a little clumsy. It was like everything suddenly started working for me.”

She grins and takes my hand, lacing our fingers together. “I bet the girls noticed.”

I smile back. “Hell, yeah, they did. That might have helped with the self-esteem just a little bit.”

She rolls her eyes and laughs. “Mm-hmm. I’m sure.”

“What about you? What were you like back then?”

She lifts her shoulders and yawns. “Not much has changed about me.”

“Did you always dream of being a dietitian for the Mustangs?”

Her eyes get a faraway look. “You know what? No, that came much later. I know it’s not very progressive of me, but…what I always dreamed of was falling in love, having a family, making our home feel special…” She blinks and her cheeks get pink.

I rub my thumb on her cheek and she leans into my hand.

“Dreams can’t be discounted. Ever.” I bring her hand to my lips and kiss her knuckles.

“You helped make my dream come true, that’s for sure…

getting Sam into this house finally.” I smooth her blanket down before my eyes meet hers again.

“But it’s turned into so much more. I didn’t even dare hope that I could have all of this, Addy.

But…you’ve surpassed every dream I’ve ever had.

I hope…” I clear my throat, needing to get this out, but suddenly a little nervous.

“I hope I’m doing the same for you too.”

She sits up and winds her hands through my hair, pressing her forehead against mine. “You are. More than I can say.”

I exhale, relief spreading through me.

“And it’s not just the kids, Penn. Or this house, or all the beautiful things. It’s you.”

“I didn’t know how much I needed to hear that.” I pull back, staring at her intently. “It’s you for me too. I’m so in love with you, I don’t even know up from down anymore.”

She laughs and it’s the best sound. “I’m right there with you. I love you so much, Penn. What are we gonna do?”

I wrap my arms around her as we laugh. “We’re going to enjoy the ride.”